I hope somebody look at this!

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I hope everybody will read it carefull.

I'm still very confused with my diagnose.
I was diagnosed last year as 'mild ASS spectrum'. She me told I was maybe 1% autistic.

I NEVER thought I was autistic, I just had a very big concentration problem.

I talked with my doctor (not that [] who give me the diagnose) and he gave me some Ritalin.
When I toke it, I felt good after 45 mins.
No euphoria, but just a 'feeling normal' feeling. I could concentrate on everything I saw.
I even see stuff I never saw before, like the color of a particular chair, or cool painting in the school hall. And I'm not the whole day tired anymore.
I can tell my mother I love her without being ashamed now.

I NEVER had problems reading emotions, or understanding social clues.
When I'm not in a fight I will NEVER say something that can touch somebody.

But when my emotions play with my head..
Sometimes I'm rude and I shout very bad stuff at my family when I'm angry. But its more impulsive, I'm like a train at that moment. I'm the only person who exist and I just want to break the person. But 5 min later when I take a walk or go to a shop.. the emotions come back to normal.. And I say: "s**t, I made a mess"...

At school when I'm with my friends outside, I usually think 100% about making a good image and categorizing other people.

I always thought I was bipolar my emotions change every hour to very tired, to awake, to feeling smart, to feeling useless, to feeling good, etc..

I'm ashamed to show my emotions, I can show them.. but I'm usually ashamed.
I only feel guilty or have empathy for animals or my family.
I got alot of close friends, but I don't really feel empathy for them, I feel like acting 100% of time.

I'm not a weirdo or somebody without social skills like most Aspies.

I want to be the best or special. I like to make myself look smart or special. I really feel like smarter then most people, more pretty looking then other people. I always wanted to be choosen, I don't feel like other.. I feel like I'm bigger not like the rest.
When I'm explaining you guys this you could think i'm narcisistic/sociopath/psychopath but why would I tell you this guys?

I

So maybe you're not autistic. Maybe she was wrong. Maybe Ritalin and some therapy is what you need.

???

If the ritalin worked then perhaps you were just ADHD.
And did you just call us weirdos? Would rather be a weirdo than conceited.

Maybe you have this too:
http://www.minddisorders.com/Flu-Inv/Hi ... order.html

A lot of that sounds like being 16.
Ritalin is an "upper". If you were "normal" on the Ritalin then you likely have a chemical imbalance like ADD or ADHD. I am not a doctor, just someone who has researched her own issues for years.

I'm kinda in de same shoes, i mite ave autism coz i woz actually smart 4 ma age n dat n plus 4 sum odd reason i find socializing so exhausting... can i ask how do u get diagnosed?

It sounds like you got ADHD. I have that as well as AS. A lot of poeple are misdiagnosed. ADHD doesn't make you stupid, it just means you can't concentrate so good. If the Ritalin works for you that's good. I don't think you shoudl woory about mental health because ADHD can cause verbally agressive outbursts. I should know...

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I have HFA, ADHD, OCD & Tourette syndrome. I love animals, especially my bunnies and hamster. I skate in a roller derby team (but I'll try not to bite )

The obvious distinction people keep missing on the "everyone is autistic" quote is starting to frustrate me.

There is a very very important and massive difference to having traits that match autism and *being* in any way autistic, 1% or 100%. You can have 10% of autistic traits and be 0% autistic. I can bump into things, a trait of being partial sighted, but be 0% partial sighted. People with ADHD have lots of autistic traits but can be 0% autistic.

So yes everyone has autistic traits, but they are still 0% autistic.

It's not what you do, it's why you do it.

How can someone even make an estimation that one is "x"% autistic anyway? It doesn't really work like that. Unless you're going by an AQ score or something.

Oh and the last bit sounds like NPD.
But then again, most people sound NPD or HPD when one actually really studies behaviour.
And of course only traits.
I think.
Except those people on My Super Sweet 16.
They definitely have NPD and HPD.