Is it common for some aspies to not like themselves?

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I know I don't really like myself because of my condition and weight. I wonder if it's common for some people with disabilities to not like themselves.

I hate myself.
I don't know if it's common with autism.
Maybe common because of bullying/abuse because of being autistic.
I think mine stems from narcissistic abuse from childhood, the narrative of which has stayed with me all through my life.

Based on books and wrong planet posts, it appears to me that autistics tend to have a lot more difficulty with social relationships and work, than neurotypicals. As a result of inadequate social relationships and work, it sounds justified that autistics would dislike themselves more than neurotypicals.

However, I think most neurotypicals, especially extroverts, are way too full of themselves. (Confidence not proportional to competence)

But you can't measure hatred or confidence.

Not a representative sample

The only perfectionists that don't hate themselves are narcissists. Any self-respecting perfectionist holds themselves to an even higher standard than they hold everyone else.

It really bugs me that my ex mental health doctor and nurse told me to have self respect. I can't do that and I don't like it when people I know give me a compliment. My self esteem is really low and I would rather like other people than myself like for example my friends. If someone I know tells me that they are proud of me I feel intense anger. I would people wouldn't praise me and if they have to that they would tell someone else the praise or go somewhere else where out of my space.

I don’t know if I am an Aspie but I am an autistic individual for sure.

I don't like myself.

I can perfectly be able to know if I appreciate or love certain people because I can feel it but I don't feel this strong feeling when I am thinking about myself. If I had, I would have known.

I don't know if I hate myself.
I don't even know if I dislike myself.
I don't know how we find out about this.

I only really started liking myself in my 50s i.e. now. I think it was because whatever I did, I was always wrong so that grinds you down doesn't it. Always wrong, always unpopular logically leads to the conclusion that I am an unlikeable person. Like now days I have no friends so logically I an unlikeable person.

But I don't care as much now I'm older.

I don't like myself not because I'm autistic or different.

I don't like myself because of having to deal with human BS that is the physical and psychological needs, the crappy habits that were passed down to me and want to unlearn so badly, and everything to do with executive dysfunction that prevents fulfilling and changing that respectively.

Just get rid of that, then I'll be a happy autistic.
And yes, getting rid of EDF BS and consequently being able to manage human BS more easily as an autistic is possible.

I've experienced that; and it was the happiest days of my life as an adult and feeling like myself -- not trapped in some EDF crap that translates into 'developmental delay'.

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When you are treated different or ostracized for just being alive .. And that goes on from early years, it is easy to be
HARD on yourself...And try to figure if this or that were different, then i would be treated differently . . or if i could only do this or ?. But if you give yourself a break, and start to look for things that might be good about you .
And remember them often..then sometimes , if noone else might? you can start to appreciate yourself , hopefully.
Maybe even carry that into the next day and maybe the day after ....And after that...you might be able to forgive the people that might not have appreciated you ? . possibly ? but only my opinion.

I like myself more than I used to. I had a difficult upbringing. If I had a different family who wasn't abusive, I think things would've been better. Even with this understanding, I often wish that I wasn't alive and don't really foresee things getting much better. A lot of that is related to trauma, though. It's very hard to separate complex trauma from autism in my brain.

I don't have negative feelings about autism or neurodiversity. It's not something that I would change about myself if I could. I'd certainly change past experiences, though.

I sometimes think, what would I be like if I wasn't autistic? Yes a lot of my life would be easier BUT what would happen to my imagination? Supposing it disappeared? Or what about my laser focus on finding mistakes in writing? If I lost that I'd have to do a different job.

Supposing I became a shallow person only interested in celebrities and shopping?

OMFG. I couldn't bear that!

It is pretty common. Just look at the depression, suicide ideation, and suicide rates of autistics.

Not caring about fitting in is not an autistic trait. If you want to fit in and it is difficult or impossible to do so there is a good possibility you will have little to no self esteem/hating oneself. This becomes a catch 22/negative loop situation. Bad self esteem lessons your chance of fitting in, which makes you feel worse about yourself.

Perhaps imagine a child,raised with "concepts of heaven and hell." Then a family that is raising that child . Not necessarily realising that that same child is autistic..( Particularily if the child is raised before Autism or ND nervous systems become known about . ) So then family is not understanding differences. Feels in order to make this child ready for life outside the family, they enforce things upon the child that does not fit with teachings of heaven/ hell.
But those people raising the child have no support for dealing with such a child..or are embarrassed of the situation.
Frustration might follow So where is the source of their frustration? ( the child) abusive situations follow
Parents not getting the results they want as the child grows,only fuel frustration. But , on the childs side . They almost have no escape . Maybe special interests follow,to escape possibly?or just cause those interests are big positive things in their reality.But families not understanding keep up the abuse. And the child from a very early life , knows heaven would be an escape from this situation,(very deep implanted concept).Reinforced abuse follows a logic pattern in youthful Aspie. That it must be me. Cause they are not seeing this happen in other families. And even the TV programs they see as part of being in the family sitting around the tv,is a accepted behaviour. But none of the programs on TV shows anything like what they are going through in the family . Being the ONLY reference they have for family. It is apparently logical and natural to think, maybe feel, that "they are the problem."
Back to the life they are feeling, is wrong or bad . And have been treated as such , validating the only input they have from society(their family at the time). So naturally ,being taught heaven is nice , And Gawd represents good
Then obvious, logic pattern follows, to escape bad they feel and are trapped in this family. Their mind goes to only concievable escape to their minds from a early age . ..Suicidal ideations follow .And a pattern is set from early years . But for some Aspies they might ,perhaps realise from things they see ,that are "not" representative of their upbringings in their birth/native family. Concepts of better things are potentially on their horizons. And like a person
lost in the ocean...from a sinking ship ( family/whatever) they swim desperately to a better situation/ shore.
If they are able to even process those possibilities.
(Based on Personal experiences as a Aspie growing up in very late 1950s and 60s,70's)in a highly dyfunctional family
but as a individually kinda/ somewhat successful Growd up Aspie. And against the odds,As my Halloween T shirt says
( i ain't dead yet)
[ this example does not include variables of Psychopaths or Sociopaths as siblings or parents] but did have 3 brothers that qualified , from outward observations of Symptoms of these disorders,later in life.

I'm not a particularly confident person. I wouldn't say that I dislike myself as such. Perhaps though my physical appearance - being overweight specifically, is something I dislike about myself.