The ASD margarine - Low Low Low

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Low confidence, Low self-esteem, Low mood. I currently have all 3 but my mood isn't low all the time.

I wish there was some organisation that would just sort things out for us but then again maybe there is in the Cedar Foundation. I don't know, I was only diagnosed last year and so the Cedar Foundation is still quite new to me, also I'm socially isolated and because I'm low I'm not accessing much media currently.

Maybe this part of the forum isn't the place for that but even thinking about it now I still don't know where it should go.

If you're depressed, you could try better nutrition, exercise, psychotherapy, CAM (alternative medicine) or pharmacotherapy (probably an SSRI).

For building self-esteem, I found that writing in my diary helped. If I felt that way, I would write why.

Just do what you can. Take it one day at a time. Where do you go tomorrow-- work, school?

If you want to be less socially isolated, your next step is to try to make friends, or move acquaintances into friend territory. Maybe this would be easier online, like on WP. You could try doing something that will get you "in" with some group, preferably a nerdy one. (Play DnD?) A site like nanowrimo.org may allow you to get together (relatively) safely with other members sometimes, which could lead to friendships. Or if you get a job, you could try to be friendly to your coworkers. (Smile when you see them. If they say hi, you say hi. Act confident. Don't monologue.)

Isn't margarine fake butter?

I can't believe it's not...Asperger's?!

o_O

What kind of schemes are afoot here?

Thanks for your reply DandelionFireworks and the others who replied while I was composing this. I found the I can't believe it's not Asperger's one witty. Margarine is a subsitute for butter.

DandelionFireworks. I don't think I'm depressed, I just don't have as full a life as I should. I only get out socially every two or three weeks when my 2 friends, (both men but all 3 of us are straight), come round and we do things like meals, the cinema, ten-pin-bowling and this Thursday we'll be playing crazy golf. We don't interact with other people apart from when ordering and paying.

I'm not depressed, I just don't have a lot of freedom at the moment, hopefully that will change soon as, like I seem to be telling everyone on this forum, I've been receiving clinical psychology for my behaviour and now my psychologist is talking about me having more freedom, gradually. Whether or not I'll be given orders on what to do or not before I do leave the house completely on my own remains to be seen.

I've known for a wee while now that I think it's the lack of freedom that's getting me down, as well as having to go to my horrible health placment every week. Seriously all I do is hang around the house waiting for my Dad to have a message to do when I'm not at an appointment, at my placement, at my psychologist's social group or out on an outing with my two friends. It sounds like I have a lot happening in my life but in reality I'm hanging around the house nearly all the time.

I'm not down ALL the time as I just brush things off and get on with my life, in which things look set to get better for me. However I'm down when I'm in my room bored.

As for monologuing, for me learning social skills is easy but putting some of them into practice is hard.

Sorry for such a long post but I'm going to answer your questions now. Tomorrow morning I'll be going to my horrible health placement, which I hate and that's just the start of a tough week. All of that means I'm really looking forward to my social outing with my two friends on Thursday night. Secondly I have good communicational skills, apart from being verbose, I say hello to people I don't know. (who say it to me first) and hi to people I do know but if some young person I don't know says hi to me I say hi back.

Thanks for reading.

I'm puzzled by the subject title? Was does margarine have to do with anything? I take it it's some sort of metaphor (or simile, or such), but I can't figure it out.

Same I have missed what margarine is referring to. At first my mind was wondering if what we mean is margin, but couldn't find any meaning there either.

Is it an inside joke between long time WPers?

I definitely know that feeling. Find something you can do that no one else can follow you on-- bury yourself in a special interest so obscure no one else knows even the faintest thing about it, or something. And then don't talk about it. Make your life someplace else, in your head. Then it won't bother you to stay in the house, because you won't really be in the house. Trust me, I've been there, done that, and it's the only thing you can do. Don't even bother to try to gain control of your space, unless it's urgent (like, you need to practice for going off to college, or if something is so bad you're going to go crazy if you keep dealing with it for another few days); instead, make another space.

After a while, you'll hardly notice you're missing anything; after all, it's not like you're staying around the house. You've been going out for coffee with all sorts of people. Or maybe you've been fighting a war alongside them. In space. (And if you're like me, you'll end up with a million story ideas.)

If that doesn't work, seek a tiny private space (like a closet, or under your bed) and make sure no one knows you even use it.

Or learn another language. Then listen to music in it. They can take the tune, but they can never take the lyrics.

I don't see why you're really bothered by not seeing friends that often. I'd be hard-pressed to think of a recent thing I've done with friends in person outside of my social skills group, which meets weekly. (I went to see a movie with an NT friend... sometime before the end of June. And I went to a friend's for Passover, so that's around Easter. Before that, I went to a party in early December. Averaging one thing every two months, there. Oh, yeah, and at one point I went for a walk to a park for a few minutes.)

Can you maybe ask to quit your health placement? Maybe you can do something better, or maybe nothing at all, with that time, but can you stop what you don't want? I quit having OT about a year ago because it wasn't helping.

I think everyone gets down when in their room bored. So be in your room not bored and not down. Take up whittling. Drawing. Writing. Reading. Creating languages. It doesn't really matter what. I used fanfic; it doesn't get much more pathetic than that, except when I actually took up playing videogames alone in the dark.

This thread is making me hungry.

Think of the trans fats!!

Don't blame you for feeling down if you're sitting around all the time. You've got to find something to do with yourself--if you don't, you'll petrify!

Hello all and thanks for the replies

Mysty, eon, there is a product here in the UK that's either butter or a butter substitute that is low in calories and low in cholesterol and it's called Low Low.

DandelionFireworks, Callista, it's not all bad, I only tend to be stuck in my room with nothing to do at night. I suppose I could play Civilizaion III more and I'm thinking of buying Civilization V when it comes out in September.

I was lucky today, my Mum was at work and my Dad had nothing to go out for but he took me for an ice-cream.

I've been on my health placement for nearly 3 years now and I've got used to it, still I don't like the "goody-two shoes" environment and the fact that I'm doing catering there, I don't have very much confidence when it comes to following recipes or cooking in general so I just tend to make the juices, put them out, put the tea-pots out and dry things, all of which I did today apart from the tea-pots. I couldn't quit it because I still live with my Mum and Dad and they wouldn't let me. However there are indications that I'll be out of it before the end of the year because I'm in a new scheme. Next year it will be college courses and maybe work-placements.

I don't want to repeat myself but I can find no other way to say this, now that I have stopped the behaviour that was getting me into trouble I might be given more freedom and my quality of life might improve.

Basically I might just have to wait a wee while and my life will get better. It's good that you're out the other side DandelionFireworks.

That social group I mentioned that I mentioned that my psychologist runs is a social skills group. So I shoukl really be asking questions. I can't think of any so I'll offer advice: you've only got one shot at this life so aim high and be determined. That's another reason why I don't like my health placement, it's very low-down. However I'll be starting college in September.

Oh and whatshername, have you tried Mullerice? During my 12-week "healthwise" programme at the gym my personal trainer reccomended them as a snack. I like the vanilla custard one.

Well, that's good, then. I'm aiming high already. See you at the top.