Diagnosed
It's like solving a puzzle, I've had the pieces floating around for years and now they are all connected at last.
So, how did you feel after the diagnosis?
Yeah, pretty much like that. When you've spent the greater part of your life bumbling about in the dark, knowing you're not like everyone else and just feeling like its only because you're some strange sort of mutant, its really amazing and wonderful to have someone turn on a light and show you there are others experiencing the same problems and that there's a reason why it happens that way.
Then there's a period after that initial elation when it really starts to sink in that it is what it is, and that its never really going to change or go away, because in fact, you're handicapped - disabled - fundamentally and to the core. That's very sobering, and kind of a bummer for a while, but eventually you absorb it, accept it as a part of who you are, but just a part.
Then there's a period, as you learn more about AS and Autism in general, that you gain a broader perspective on how truly pervasive its effects are in your life, that it goes deeper than you ever realized, that it has shaped your personality since you were born, because it affects the way you experience and perceive literally everything that happens to you and everything and everyone you interact with. And you become kind of hyper-aware of your Autism as you go through your day, and you wonder if others can see it when they look at you, if your behaviors give you away. Then you realize 'Of course they can - they always could - all those years I thought I was acting like one of them and pulling it off, they could see it all the time.'
At that point you just relax and stop trying to even act 'normal' anymore - its too much strain and effort and it wasn't really working anyway.
indeed
It's like solving a puzzle, I've had the pieces floating around for years and now they are all connected at last.
So, how did you feel after the diagnosis?
---
Yes, agree that a correct diagnosis helps to put things in place better whether the diagnosis is Asperger's for some or, for others, things like central auditory processing disorder (CAPD), mild dyspraxia, or ADHD Inattentive type.
I congratulate you on following through to get a clinical opinion. that can be really helpful to strengthening your stance and being the real you toward those who have always found you to be difficult and frustrating but have had to put up with you.
i agree with everything willard said. now it is the time to stop trying so hard to be "Exactly" like everyone else to satisfy them and stand up for who you are, embrace your talents, and push them to the front in dealing with life and people.
_________________
http://youhaventmetyourselfyet.blogspot.com/
Learn the answers to all your wondering... get Complete Guide to asperger's by Dr. Tony Attwood.
http://www.aspiescentral.com/member.php/75-eon
ADHDer since 1990. Diagnosed Aspie 8/2010
I felt interested. I immediately started studying autism. That's what I do when I'm diagnosed with anything.
Anyway, I'm glad you didn't get thrown off balance by your diagnosis. Getting one can be difficult, but it sounds like you're not going to get caught in the "OMG I have a label, woe is me" trap. Finding solutions to problems is what a diagnosis is for; and now you have more resources you can use to find those solutions.
_________________
Reports from a Resident Alien:
http://chaoticidealism.livejournal.com
Autism Memorial:
http://autism-memorial.livejournal.com
Remember to read things critically--there are many, many opinions about autism, and many things we don't fully understand.
_________________
Reports from a Resident Alien:
http://chaoticidealism.livejournal.com
Autism Memorial:
http://autism-memorial.livejournal.com
Congrats.
As to how I felt, it was a little jarring. I never really considered myself "Asperger's" prior to talking to the doctor. I had read The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime , and I had understood the condition to be about little boys who could barely communicate, had no empathy or imagination, stared at ceiling fans, and were obsessed with train schedules.
How wrong I was. It was odd because the psychologist confirmed what I had previous thought to be just my imagination: I AM weird.
Good luck.
I am really curious - why couldn't you do it before you were diagnosed? In my opinion, you should not try to be like anyone else whether you are diagnosed with anything or not.
I am really curious - why couldn't you do it before you were diagnosed? In my opinion, you should not try to be like anyone else whether you are diagnosed with anything or not.
I'm not speaking for Eon. I'm just curious to see if my answer would be the same.
I don't think it's really a matter of whether or not we "can" do it beforehand. It's more a matter of not really knowing for certain, so we kind of have to go on the premise there really is nothing different about us, so we feel obliged to continue trying as hard as we can to do and be like everyone around us. It's societal expectation. Once you learn that even the NT world of psychology agrees there is something measurably different, it's like a pressure valve being released. Not that we should use our diagnosis to NOT do our best and keep trying our hardest, but at least we know our limitations aren't just imaginary. They are real, therefore we can now embrace who we are, come to understand it, better, and most importantly, get to know what our true strengths and weaknesses are, and work with both rather than against them.
_________________
I'm not likely to be around much longer. As before when I first signed up here years ago, I'm finding that after a long hiatus, and after only a few days back on here, I'm spending way too much time here again already. So I'm requesting my account be locked, banned or whatever. It's just time. Until then, well, I dunno...
I am really curious - why couldn't you do it before you were diagnosed? In my opinion, you should not try to be like anyone else whether you are diagnosed with anything or not.
I'm not speaking for Eon. I'm just curious to see if my answer would be the same.
I don't think it's really a matter of whether or not we "can" do it beforehand. It's more a matter of not really knowing for certain, so we kind of have to go on the premise there really is nothing different about us, so we feel obliged to continue trying as hard as we can to do and be like everyone around us. It's societal expectation. Once you learn that even the NT world of psychology agrees there is something measurably different, it's like a pressure valve being released. Not that we should use our diagnosis to NOT do our best and keep trying our hardest, but at least we know our limitations aren't just imaginary. They are real, therefore we can now embrace who we are, come to understand it, better, and most importantly, get to know what our true strengths and weaknesses are, and work with both rather than against them.
And there are the millions of people nagging you about it every day, often including parents.
"Why can't you keep your hands to yourself? No one else has to touch everything they see!"
"Stop pacing! You're annoying me!"
"How can you be so clueless? You must be TRYING to be clueless; just PAY ATTENTION!"
I'm not even AS (well, not entirely sure) and I can come up with hundreds of those. I am far too well aware of the things that parents like me believe the child should know and be able to do, and the pressure we get to just force our kids to do it. I am also aware of how hopeless that made my child feel, because some of that stuff he could NOT control, and because we trying to halt stims he NEEDED to do to be able to think straight.
_________________
Mom to an amazing young adult AS son, plus an also amazing non-AS daughter. Most likely part of the "Broader Autism Phenotype" (some traits).
Similar Topics | |
---|---|
Just got officially diagnosed |
04 Mar 2024, 7:11 am |
Best friend's got diagnosed with AS |
14 Mar 2024, 7:18 pm |
Newly diagnosed and struggling |
19 Apr 2024, 11:51 pm |
King Charles diagnosed with cancer |
25 Mar 2024, 12:04 pm |