Help - my mum dosnt like me and doesnt care about my asperg

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she says it in a sarcastic way


we dont get on well - for years we had fights - i felt she never understood or wanted to understand my problems - she cares about small children with autism (server autism eg at a primary school where she works

when i was diagnosed about 5 years ago - she didnt believe it - she thought people with autism - you could see they were different - ive spent hours and hours explaining to her about it - she just doesnt care - its not fair:( all other mums really care:(


but to me - couldnt care - she say sarcastically- yea - its your aspergers / sesnory issues

Not true. Many people have parents who won't or can't listen to the idea. Even with an official diagnosis, my father will never be convinced.. that the diagnosis is legit, or even enough to investigate what the diagnosis would mean... no chance. My sister will likely find reasons to deny the diagnostic criteria. My step mother will likely joke about it and call it "more of M's bull@#!$".

When I tried to present the ide ato my mom and stepfather, it resulted in a confrontationa nd meltdown. Words were spoken by my stepfather that have not been repealed and have caused me to lose any respect for him.... oddly enough, it was him talking to his shrink (alcoholism) about the incident that led his shrink to suggest ASD might actually be a diagnosis that suits me... And that's when my mother started to put SOME credence in my idea.

So you aren't the only one.

I never had a DX until my parents died(I'm old)

But they and my sister were nasty to me, much of the time

Yeah that s**t happens with my mom too.She claim to understand me but she don't really.She mostly think I'm an Aspie who think very closely to an NT and treath me as such.My bro is a f*cking cruel little brat and I don't hold any love or respect for him for what he did to me because I'm an Aspie.My stepfather thinks I'm some kind of ret*d and when I said I didn't want to take meds he said that meant I wasn't Asperger anymore since Aspies must take meds.My dad denied my DX for a while,"saying it was some BS my mom invented to not take the bkame because she raised me badly"...Most of my family isn't better (aunts,cousins,etc...),they basically can't tell the difference between LFA and autism and always ask me questions like "If you're autistic how can you be able to talk" and they think I'm mentally diseased or I'm like a prisonner or some s**t like this.Ever since I made my autistic "coming out" many people treathed me like some kind of second class citizen and I was mostly rejected.The only times people talked to me they talked to me like a baby,but one day I was pissed off so I explained them about my condition and they apologised and now they're cool about it.

My mum's sarcastic all the time and extremely verbally abusive and was physically abusive when I was small until late teens. Like punching me in the side of my head repeatedly while holding a clump of my hair in her fist while I was sitting at my desk in my room. I don't even understand what sets her off. I've tried giving her "my all" but even if I made looking after her a full time job she still wouldn't be happy. When I confront her about the physical abuse she denys it and says I'm crazy. She seems to set me up to get in trouble, like saying something just as I shut a door so that I hear some of what she says then getting angry when I ignore it. I can't go mute around her because that makes her just as angry. Often I consider leaving and never seeing her again.

Last edited by Pobodys_Nerfect on 28 Sep 2010, 6:56 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Maybe you could try asking her to read some books about Asperger's Syndrome, just so she can see that plenty of research has been done on this condition? I'm sorry she's being so unreasonable. You'd think that, since she works with children with autism, she'd be able to realize that there are tons of autism-spectrum disorders, including Asperger's Syndrome. It's quite odd that she seems to be in denial that Asperger's Syndrome even exists.

Hm. Well see my mom cares, but doesn't think I have asperger's, only because she is socially awkward herself and sees me as normal.

The fights with your mom, I understand. It's inexplicable, my understanding, but I know the manner of the reason behind it, obviously most of it sprouting from your autism.

There's nothing I or anyone else can do. Talking to her yourself really is all that would do any help. And you would talk about why she doesn't care.