Feeling More "Aspie" During Certian Times?

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I have just experienced a very strange phenomenon which I thought may be of interest to others on the spectrum.

I am what most people would call "well-adjusted" despite my diagnosises of AS and PDD-NOS. I have learned social skills, my sensory difficulties that I had in the past are gone, and my interests have been toned down. I still have problems with heavy anxiety, but my biggest struggle is that I miss my unique way of percieving the world as a kid, and I want it back. I have this intense yearning to recover the vivid, dreamlike world of my childhood to the point where I have become depressed and have recently went through a period where I did drugs and engaged in binge drinking (something I'm still trying to manage today).

There is a period every year where a heavy sinus infection strikes me due to my seasonal allergies...I have horrible nausea, headaches, pains and mild fever...and I am experiencing this right now. The weird thing about it is that I will often experience extremely vivid dreams during this time, and during these dreams I feel like I percieve things like...or rather I am, the enigmatic kid with full blown AS again.

Sounds and colours are brighter, music is playing through my head, and I become "lost in a feeling" as I often was as a child. When I wake up, I feel like I'm seven years old and for and hour or so after waking I will have the vivid sensations and perceptions that I used to have...but the more time I spend awake, the more they fade away until they are gone altogether. I keep sleeping as long as possible, of course, because I don't want this feeling to fade. In these dreams I am transported to somewhere secure and chock full of my past special interests...and not only that but I percieve things like I did when younger.

In this dream I was in a student residence by a vast ocean (if this means anything). It was near an airport with jet planes flying above my head (a past special interest) and there were students around me. I didn't interact with them, in fact I didn't know how to, but I took their physical variations in with great interest (like red hair earrings etc, just like I did when i was a kid). Later on when I entered the residence I had no idea where to go and what to do and was afraid to ask anyone (typical me in grade 4), but there was a book of all the students in the residence ordered by last name...and I just POURED through it even when people asked what I was doing (one of my last most intense interests was lists of names...especially of people my age). At the end of the dream there were school buses and I would stare at them and take in all the details and numbers (another past interest).

It was so weird. This has happened many times when I've had sinus infections...but I've never documented it.

Just wondering what your views on this are from an AS perspective and if any of you can relate to this phenomenon at all. Do any of you experience periods where you feel more "aspie" than usual, where you feel like a younger version of yourself? Anyone have the "dream" phenomenon I just described?

My AS seems to get more severe when I am stressed out or have anxiety or when I go through depression or when I am not working. But when I work, I seem to be able to function better and I am more normal. My mind seems to be normal when it wants to be so I find myself doing eye contact or having normal conversations. But occasionally I will have a breakout and bam there I am going on and on about my obsessions stating facts and trivia. Something I used to do all the time as a kid and then I stopped when I started to work on not talking about them and not wanting to sound arrogant.

As my mom says, they come and go.

I'd attribute any time that you feel 'more' afflicted to simply being more aware of it. Sometimes I'll catch myself doing something very typically AS and have a bit of a chuckle to myself.

I started a thread about this back in May: http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt125965.html

Since then, I have discovered that the following factors will affect my level of "Aspergianess" and a good combination of them will have me feeling just about NT (for a little while):

1. Sleep: If I can manage to get a good 8-9 hours of uninterrupted, unmedicated sleep, then I can function very well, but only for maybe a work day... then I need a nap. Also, oddly if I get only around four hours of sleep, I feel very clear-headed and social, but it only lasts for about an hour after I get up, then, BAM, I'm feeling super-autistic and need to go back to bed.

2. Diet: This is more in the sense of the consequence of BAD diet. If I eat a wholesome, nutritious diet, I don't feel more more NT, but if I eat a bad diet of junk or fatty food, I become less able to function, getting very reptitive, and I cannot handle people. So, I try to eat as well as I can.

3. Aerobic exercise: Right after about 20-25 minutes of cardiovascular exercise, I can outdo the average corporate management NT, but it only lasts about an hour, maybe two, at most and also running to the office in the morning and arriving all sweaty isn't very practical anyway.

When I just get over a cold or flu I always feel hyperfunctional as well. But those are my observations myself... if it helps.

I definitely feel my AS at some times more than others; however, I'm not sure if the cause is that I'm stressed/anxious/depressed, or that I just happen to be paying attention to it more.

Totally! Great topic. I find my symptoms of not communicating well and feeling more awkward get worse when I'm tired, upset or eating too much sugar. It's kind of like someone who's learnt another language and when they get upset or tired they lapse into their original tongue. Except in my case I can't speak and end up uttering gibberish which usually ensures I lose every single heated argument I'm in.

I think we are all subject to energy problems. Even NT's will be cranky after a bad nights sleep. I seem to have a problem with winter and summer. I am in UK and we have such a difference between those two seasons. The summer I am happier and have more energy. I tend to devote my energy to the gym, or my special interest. If I am working I become more chatty and relaxed with coleagues.

In about November (now) I slip into winter mode. I am much more tired and so get very cranky and tend to keep myself out of everyones sight. I sleep whenever I can and my food intake drops. Winter will also make me depressed. It is during the winters that I have lost most my jobs and p*ssed others off.

I love it when the spring comes. I forget all about the bad stuff I did all winter and start smiling again.

I don't think my Aspie traits are worse in the winter. But I do think that during the winter I am less able to act like an NT.

I become more self-conscious about my autistic traits if I've watched or read something that has to do with autism.

My AS is only obvious when I am around people.

If I'm an aspie, then I don't think my AS 'comes and goes' like that.

I'm pretty much consistently aware of it. It's almost as though my AS is another side of me completely.