autism school project

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Hello. My name is Heidi Laberda, and I am a student at Osseo Senior High. For my English class, we're writing a research paper, and I'm researching how disciplining an autistic child differs from other children, because I am interested in learning how to encourage positive behavior in an autistic child and how to discipline for unacceptable behavior. For my paper, I need to do some interviews by October 4th, and I would greatly appreciate it if you take some time out of your busy schedule to answer these ten questions (in great detail).

1. what kind of behavior can you expect from autistic children?

2. How can a parent calm an autistic child down from a temper tantrum?

3. what is the best (positive) technique for disciplining an autistic child for bad behavior?

4. how do you think siblings grow up with their autistic sibling being treated different than them?

5. what should you do when an autistic child uses violence when throwing a tantrum?

6. how do you teach an autistic child something new, even though they demand repetition and hate change?

7. explain how you explain to someone about an autistic child's behavior.

8. how do you feel when someone feels that people use autism as an excuse for autistic behavior?

9. explain your thoughts on using the gluten and casein free diet on autistic children.

10. do you think once an autistic child learns a habit, it can't be undone?

Getting started with your project a bit late, eh? October 4th is tomorrow.

I don't have an "official" diagnosis yet, but since no one else has posted yet I'll put in my two cents. I think your questions show some misconceptions that need to be corrected.

1) All autistic children are not the same.

2) It depends on whether it is really a temper tantrum or a meltdown, which is different. A temper tantrum is what non-autistic children do to manipulate people and get their way. I suppose an autistic child could do this also, although I don't remember ever trying to manipulate my parents in this way, but generally what appears to be a tantrum is probably really a meltdown due to sensory and/or emotional overload. In this case, I suppose it would be best to quietly and calmly take precautions to keep the child from hurting him/herself, causing damage, or hurting others. Do not raise your voice, and avoid touch if possible, since these will tend to aggravate the situation. It is not a time to discipline the child. Having a meltdown is an absolutely miserable experience. I'm in my twenties and I still have them, by the way.

3) Again, first you have to make a distinction between what is bad behavior and what isn't. If it really is bad behavior, like biting someone, then, I don't know, my parents used to deprive me of things I liked such as a bedtime story.

4) I don't understand the question.

5) See #2.

6) I don't understand this question either. We can learn new things; we're not robots. I have read that incorporating the child's special interest into academic subjects can help a lot with focus and motivation, and I can see from my own experience how that would be helpful, since I tend to be a lot more focused when I am reading about what interests me.

7) Not being a parent, I have never had to explain my child's behavior to someone. But I suppose it would depend on what the behavior was and one would have to know the underlying cause, for instance, if the child is being nonresponsive, it might be because they are shutting down due to too much sensory input, or if they are screaming in the grocery store, maybe it's because the fluorescent lights and loud noises are upsetting them and they feel helpless.

8 ) Isn't autism by definition an "excuse" for autistic behavior? If an autistic person is rocking, which is considered to be an "autistic behavior," the reason why they are doing that is presumably related to their autism.

9) If the child is gluten intolerant, then I guess it would help. If not, then it wouldn't.

10) No, I don't think that.

Good luck with your project.

1. what kind of behavior can you expect from autistic children?
You can expect them to be children, for one. They're not robots and they don't do everything they do just "because they're autistic". And they are all different. The best you can do to know what to expect is to meet a lot of autistic children and learn about the range of behavior. You could get anything from not talking to you to buttonholing you and giving you a lecture about some topic that's supposed to be way too complex for kids. You could get somebody who's fascinated with Sesame Street, or you could get somebody who's fascinated with the ceiling fan. Overwhelmed autistic kids could do anything from running away to having a meltdown to shutting down completely. Really, you'd have to meet a lot of kids and get to know them. You can't predict a thing about a kid's behavior just by knowing they're autistic.

2. How can a parent calm an autistic child down from a temper tantrum?
If it's a meltdown: Back off. Find a quiet spot. Let it run its course. When I'm in meltdown mode, I can't understand what people are saying to me, anyway. If it's a manipulative temper tantrum, oddly enough, same thing: Back off. Kids throwing manipulative tantrums are looking for attention; kids having meltdowns are overwhelmed by attention. Either way, best to just back off, make sure nobody gets hurt, and wait until the kid's calm again and has had some time to recharge before you figure out what went wrong and how to prevent it happening again.

3. what is the best (positive) technique for disciplining an autistic child for bad behavior?
Let the kid know what the rules are and--this is the important thing--how to obey them. You can't just say "Keep your room clean." You have to define what clean means; and you have to teach him how to do it. I used to get yelled at for not keeping my room clean when in reality I had no idea where to start or how to do such a job; and instead of being taught how, I got blamed for it. It's important to let them know exactly what's expected of them and exactly what will happen if they fall short of those expectations; and then to only have expectations that they can actually fulfill. You ask them to do something they can't do, and they'll only feel helpless and stupid for it.

4. how do you think siblings grow up with their autistic sibling being treated different than them?
Well, my situation was unusual: My mom married a sociopathic sort of a fellow who figured that I was a good target for his abusive jerkwad behavior. So because I didn't have the ability, socially, to pacify him, I was the person he used to take out his anger on, and my sister mostly hid instead. She ran away from home at sixteen, a year after I left home, and is currently an English teacher in China. As far as I can tell, she recovered well enough from the experience; she went to counseling for some time but is doing pretty well for herself now.

5. what should you do when an autistic child uses violence when throwing a tantrum?
Make sure he doesn't hurt himself or anybody else. If you can get him to an environment with no sharp edges, that's good (like just out in the middle of the floor instead of near furniture). Don't try to pin him down; he'll probably panic. I know I did, when they did that to me.

6. how do you teach an autistic child something new, even though they demand repetition and hate change?
Actually, routine and change-resistance don't really interfere all that much with learning new things; many of us are voracious self-taught and self-motivated collectors of facts and information. It's unpredictable new things that we really have trouble with. Just tell us what's coming up, and we'll be OK.

7. explain how you explain to someone about an autistic child's behavior.
Depends on the behavior. If I'm rocking, and someone comments on it, I might say, "Oh, I always fidget like that," or, "I think better this way." It's easier to explain things in terms that typical people understand than if you try to explain autism all at once to somebody who hasn't been studying it for a while like I have. So, the classic situation of an autistic kid overwhelmed and having a meltdown in a grocery store, the parent might say, "She's tired and just couldn't take it anymore." (And think twice about taking an exhausted autistic kid into a grocery store, if she can help it; that's just plain torture.)

8. how do you feel when someone feels that people use autism as an excuse for autistic behavior?
Umm... What? That's like saying I use being a girl as an excuse for female behavior. Of course I behave in an autistic way! I am autistic!

9. explain your thoughts on using the gluten and casein free diet on autistic children.
If you have an allergy or celiac disease, it can really help; but that's true for non-autistics, too. The difference might be that autistics are more easily overwhelmed by symptoms of allergies or celiac disease, and treating these conditions is even more important than it usually is because, hey, we need all the resources we can get; we don't need to use up part of our stress-tolerance level on symptoms that could be removed just by getting rid of some food we can't digest. As for treating actual symptoms of autism with GF/CF, in the absence of allergies or celiac disease: No. That's been tested in a controlled study and shown not to work.

10. do you think once an autistic child learns a habit, it can't be undone?
No. Don't be silly; we learn like anyone else. Can be more difficult to re-learn, of course, but that also means good habits are harder to break. It's a trade-off.

yes i'm aware that there are misconceptions and i started this late especially since this project determines me graduating on time. i've been busy trying to contact various autism organizations and psychologists and pcas' through e-mails but it's been hard trying to get in contact with people who aren't busy or didn't flake out on me. this project is meant for the average reader that might not fully understand autism. thank you to those who took time out of your busy lives to help this irresponsible senior with her essay.

i apologize for questions 6: i meant to say "when people think it's an excuse for bad behavior

hi it sounds an interesting project, but could i just add an irrelivant point(s)?

most 'layman's' info on autism is concentrated on children- it would open your proj out a bit if you mentioned something of the experiance of adults with AS- after all- the chlidren will grow up, and spend most of their lves as adults. so the care of them is in part to prepare them for the world at large.

it may be a child care class or something, im not sure, and even though its for school... its just frustrating to CONSTANTLY find this subconscious expectation that autism perhaps 'wears off', as most people relate it only to children, + young ones at that.
so even though your proj will only be read by your tutors, it'd be good academically, as well as -um- for justice- if you related all this to adult life; even just a line at the end of each chapter on several of the probs adults w autism face concerning that aspect, and how early years experiance helped/hindered them.
+ mention the behaviour those dx'd late recieved- force fed, force hugged (!), force- well- lots of things.

its my obsession today, sorry, but if you're not including this aspect of autistic childcare, it would be relivant, and might earn you extra brownie points.

also, as a general reply to your questions, its important to preface your proj w a paragrap in bold, caps etc- atht WE ARE ALL DIFFERENT.
what little the public know of autism is really the old fashioned definition- sheldon in the big bang theory, rainman- when really - lots of us are more like phoebe from friends (i am, just much less happy). its much more nuanced, so much is hidden... there are always threads here baout 'you dont look like you're autistic'. we all get it.

you need to clarify its really hard to generalise; mention that that there are no established subtypes, (even the male female diffs have cross over points, and female autism is massivly undiagnosed- read tony attwood)- there have been subtype threads on here. so some types will eg- learn better than others.

so- there- ive just suggested loads of extra studying for you! my work is done.
also it changes- some days are worse than others.