Do you avoid events which attract people who do not like you

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Alla
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15 Oct 2010, 6:37 pm

Do you avoid going to places or events where people who do not like also
go to?
In the academic world, one is bound to make lots of enemies, especially aspie academics. A couple of aspies I know, including myself, avoid going to conferences or other academic events where the people who do not like us may show up. I honestly do it because I do not want to interact with these people.....their mere presence brings bad memories and ruins my day. It is also notworth spending time with people who dislike you and who spread rumors about you.

So, do you avoid situations like these?



ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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15 Oct 2010, 6:42 pm

Oh, definitely! I won't go to places where I know people who have harassed me will be. I just don't want to deal with them.



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15 Oct 2010, 6:46 pm

Of course I avoid places like that! It's just common sense.



Kaybee
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15 Oct 2010, 7:03 pm

I can't tell who does and doesn't like me.


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15 Oct 2010, 7:06 pm

I avoid such places, as well.


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15 Oct 2010, 7:21 pm

Unless they are really in my face direct, I don't notice or care what people who I don't know, think of me. The few times that someone did decide to push my buttons I ignored them. On 2 occasions someone managed to push me too far despite my ignoring them, they thought twice about doing it again. One of those times was at Mardi Gras (how i ended up in that crowd is a long story) I was already stressed my the huge crowd and a guy starts yelling at me, I ignored him, but he was showing off for his friends.. he grabbed my arm and I punched him in the gut, knocking the wind out of him and I left. Another time at a Florida State game a guy poured a beer over my head on purpose, I lost my temper and shoved him over the seats below us.. I regained composure just as I landed on top of him and he apologised. Neither case I'm proud of and NEVER favor violence over diplomacy. I still find ignoring them and walking away the best solution.. There will be idiots usually trying to make themselves look cool in front of other idiots, but I won't stop living my life because of them..


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15 Oct 2010, 7:39 pm

I don't care who likes or doesn't like me.


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15 Oct 2010, 7:56 pm

MizLiz wrote:
I don't care who likes or doesn't like me.


Now see! I could have just said that.. but Noooo I had to get all long winded again... lol


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15 Oct 2010, 9:11 pm

Definitely. It's not fun to be with people who don't like me.

Although I guess if it's important enough, I do sometimes suck it up & go. It's stressful though.



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15 Oct 2010, 9:48 pm

Alla wrote:
In the academic world, one is bound to make lots of enemies, especially aspie academics. A couple of aspies I know, including myself, avoid going to conferences or other academic events where the people who do not like us may show up.


Ah, politics. :roll: Personally, if the conference/event was that important to me, professionally speaking, I'd probably go anyway and just try to avoid them. I don't want to let bullies dictate what I do or don't do.


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ADHDorASDorBoth
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15 Oct 2010, 10:34 pm

No, I just prefer to avoid going anywhere with humans present.



wavefreak58
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15 Oct 2010, 11:05 pm

This seems like an odd question. I would think even an NT would avoid places where they are disliked.



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15 Oct 2010, 11:16 pm

It may seem like an absurd question...but I know a girl who has AS and has troubles with this. She'll assign people to be her friends based on what she thinks of them, rather than the "like" being mutual. Of course, when they meet, she's all smily and nice and they can be polite...but she doesn't understand that some of them don't respect her as much as other people.


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My longtime psychiatrist has confirmed that I do not qualify for an ASD diagnosis (but have traits & OCD-like traits).

Mostly keeping a distance from ASD-related things (including WP).


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15 Oct 2010, 11:48 pm

No. If they don't like me, that's their problem, and if I don't like them, that's their fault.



matt
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16 Oct 2010, 12:37 am

Yes.

I also avoid events which attract people who do like me.



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16 Oct 2010, 1:20 am

I think a lot of people do this :P