how to find support groups for people who HAVE aspergers?!?!

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ericmc783
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14 Jul 2006, 4:35 am

grrrrrrrr. i have done much searching online for support groups relating to AS (ones that actually meet in real life, not on a website). while i have found many AS related support groups, pretty much all of them dealt with support for parents of a child with AS, or siblings of an AS child. its as if there is no such thing in the world as a support group for adults who actually HAVE AS. 8O :evil:

keep in mind that i have a mild case of AS. im not like an extreme case of it where i cant possibly carry on a conversation with anybody. i like talking to ppl and i feel that if i were able to meetup with other ppl who have as, that they might be able to understand my quirks and irregularities better than people i currently talk to in everyday life.

is anybody here currently involved in any sort of support group specifically for people with as or autism?? (and i of course mean a real life group, not an online forum, although this place is kewl). if so, how did you find out about your support group.


any help at all would be appreciated.

thank you kindly,

-Eric



Tim_Tex
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14 Jul 2006, 5:27 am

I also fit the mild AS category, and I am also irritated that there are very few Aspie groups here (in Houston).

Tim



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14 Jul 2006, 5:59 am

I actually feel kinda hurt that all AS and Autism support groups here are for family and friends of someone With AS.

It implies that living and interacting with us is a burden, and they should be felt sorry for, like we're some sort of cancerous cyst attatched to them sucking out all their life, and we ourselves have "nothing to complain about" and are all the blame.

My mother tells me on a regular basis that I cause half her problems and depression.

I can see how hard it is for her, but she seems to have trouble accepting how hard life has been for me.



Hellfire418
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14 Jul 2006, 6:19 am

it sucks that your mom tells you that

if my mom were to tell me that i would tell her to get a life, most of her problems stem from her lack of self control with money which i unfortunately inherited. if it wasnt for my wife getting me out of those bad habits i would probably be beyond broke and still living with her.

you are not the cause of her depression

you are a scapegoat that she uses because she cant deal with it so instead of blaming herself she blames you.
trust me i get it from my mom too



hale_bopp
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14 Jul 2006, 7:23 am

Hellfire418 wrote:
you are a scapegoat that she uses because she cant deal with it so instead of blaming herself she blames you.
trust me i get it from my mom too


Oh it's always everyones fault exept hers, mine, dads, my sisters, the cats, the grandparents, the neighbours ect. Any time anything is mentioned to make her think even slightly that she's responsible for some of it herself, she puts her back up so quickly it's like talking to a brick wall. It's always about how s**t life is for her and how noone understands her.

Its her fault she married my dad, and she never stops complaing about it and keeps making excuses for herself. "I didn't know he had depression and AS when I married him.. BLAH BLAH BLAH"

And when I try to tell her this, she just puts on a big guiltrip trying to make me feel bad for saying it.

Dad's no better either, he always tells me to "get a life" when I try and defend myself in any way whatsoever about anything, My sister is a hot tempered jerk that won't accept that I don't want to talk all the time, The only person I can relate to in this family is the cat, then they wonder why I give the cat so much more love than them.



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14 Jul 2006, 7:36 am

Not trying to sound stupid,but sometimes I don't really understand WHY they make groups for parents or siblings that have a family member with AS.WE are the ones that have to go through it,not THEM.

OKay,okay,so they do have to live with us and all,but they aren't the ones who have it(unless you have a parent with AS,like I do,but my Mom's a b***h so I'm kinda screwed over there...).

And the books that are written about AS for parents and professionals?Yes,those are good,but why the crap is there books written ONLY for parrnts and pro's?I have seen some autobiographies of people with AS,and I'm sure theere are some self-help books for people with AS,but...-shakes head-


-SpaceCase :x


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Raph522
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14 Jul 2006, 7:47 am

support groups...........
I don't think i have ever seen one made for people AS.... its a very strange world



hale_bopp
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14 Jul 2006, 8:10 am

and anyway, why do they need support groups because someone they know has AS?

They can escape it.

We can't.



larsenjw92286
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14 Jul 2006, 8:34 am

Actually, I am considering joining a group for people with AS.

Ironically, the group is located in the county right next door to me in New York. The place where it is located has lots of computer work facilities. I find that a coincidence because a job in computers is something that I (and a lot of other people with AS for that matter) would be very good at.


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CockneyRebel
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14 Jul 2006, 8:42 am

I feel that they should take the focus off of our callous Family Members and put the focus on US.



Michael1973
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14 Jul 2006, 8:52 am

I'm in Connecticut, and we have an Aspie support group here. There are also some in southern New York state as well. Not sure about other parts of the world.



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14 Jul 2006, 9:38 am

I've been thinking that maybe a bigbrother bigsister program would be a good idea.
What I need is mostly just interaction.
And I feel like what aspie kids need is just someone who understands what they face.
It could be helpful to everyone I think.


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14 Jul 2006, 10:14 am

Eric,

I cannot get an idea as to where you are at so I cannot say much about availablity. I think that Adult groups tend to form in 2 places:

1) The adults themselves form the group whether they have support of the other local organizations or not
2) Those running organizations for persons with ASDs are more enlightened

For example, the Twin Cities area seems to have a more enlightened (and more accurate) viewpoint of those with ASDs. There are 2 adult groups in the cities. One I think is ran by adult aspies and the other is ran by the Autism Society. There is no push for cures and the facilitators primarily work to make sure everyone gets a chance to speak.

I also noticed that curbie organizations do not tend to visit Minnesota. Now you can say that it is due to the lack of population but I do not think that is so. Minneapolis Metro area is larger than the Buffalo or Rochester NY and yet the curbie organizations visit those 2 other cities all of the time. Not only that but Minnesota is being hit harder by ASDs then upstate NY. I do not know if this is evidence of lack of support for these organizations but it is interesting.

As far as parents/siblings groups, I think the answer comes from "Do Not Mourn For Us". Simply put, we are not the child they were expecting and as we get older, we are not following the normal patterns. Some parents follow the advice of the article and accept what is going on. Those parents may need support but mostly to realize that they are not alone. Other parents are still in the grief process and you see that by the way they blame the child for their problems or otherwise think of the child as something that is damaged. Those are the people that need the support groups but if my suspisions are correct, the support they get is that their own feelings are valid which does not help us.


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juliekitty
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14 Jul 2006, 10:19 am

I found a local group here: http://www.meetup.com/

Unfortunately their first meeting is the day before an exam. But I definitely plan to make the next one.



krex
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14 Jul 2006, 10:27 am

I just found an AS support group in Minnesota ...I was just surfing for AS info...looking for web sites and stumbled on it.They only meet once a month and I dont know if I will ever get up the courage to go.....I'm going in for DX on the 20th, so I'm not even sure I have AS ...considering I might have schizoid personality instead.....point being....I misunderstood about AS and thought it had more social avoidance.....I really dont like being in groups so the idea of a social group seems a little pointless for me....I was more interested in socializing in teens and twentys but at forty....I think i've had enough of social groups.....though I love forums and chatting on line....can leave with a click of the mouse :D

I would suggest you try .....the letters of your state as you would write them on an envalope......ie...Minnesota=MN....followed by aspie.com....and see if you come up with anything....
Hope that helps


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14 Jul 2006, 11:07 am

I joined an autism society in Denmark. They only have activities for parents, parents and smaller children, and siblings. Not for ASD's at all. I'm not a member any more. Oh and theres a lot of courses for proffesionals.

I found a support group run by a psychologist but it costs a lot of money.