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zeldapsychology
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06 Apr 2011, 2:07 pm

This falls under the show emotions differently part of AS so I thought it fit here. Dad called (to check on the pool being built) and said he totalled his jeep. I said no way and took it as a joke (since he is a morbid jokester. At one time he said tell mom the light is green when it's red and she'll go.) So ya odd since of humour there. Mom came home and said he was in a wreck so I believed it finally then I cried and was emotional and upset. I am thankful he's ok but OMG! he could have rolled or been thrown out or died!! SHEESH!! ! FOR GOD SAKE THE MAN DOESN'T WEAR HIS SEATBELT! I am thankful he's ok but am also shocked too. I had an aunt die in a wreck as a child and feel OMG! wow! dad survived when IMO he should be dead! Is this delayed reaction or this reaction an issue at all? Thank You WP members. :-)



wavefreak58
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06 Apr 2011, 2:16 pm

Maybe asking other aspiesif this is an odd reaction isn't such a good idea :lol: :lol: :lol:

Seems to me that if your dad is a serial jokester, your reaction was completely understandable.


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zeldapsychology
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06 Apr 2011, 2:46 pm

wavefreak58 wrote:
Maybe asking other aspiesif this is an odd reaction isn't such a good idea :lol: :lol: :lol:

Seems to me that if your dad is a serial jokester, your reaction was completely understandable.


Good point. :-)



Mar1976
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06 Apr 2011, 3:13 pm

It's just how you process information I guess, so not "odd" to you.

I find I don't react to bad news the way most people do until I think about it intensly or see the evidence; like you said until you got the information straight from your Mum you didn't believe it.

The following will probably sound heartless (my reaction to the situation), but I only 'processed' and 'made real' the situation, right at the last minute when it could have been too late.

A member of my family was ill and taken to hospital urgently from the GP practise; I was called to say what had happened and was worried, but sort of went on with my life; I called every day to check that everything was ok, but did nothing else.

I think a whole week past and it was then explained to me that they were very, very lucky that it had been spotted because the outcome could have been fatal and they still weren't 'out of the woods' yet. It was only then that I realised that I was expected to be there (I live some distance from my family).
So, I made the trip, arrived at the hospital, greeted with some disgusted looks from the family who were visiting them, saw my ill relative lying in the hospital bed with an oxygen 'mask' on, tubes coming out of their arm looking vulnerable and half the person I knew; it was THEN I got a lump in my throat and reality struck.

I'm guessing that some of my family probably think I was heartless, selfish and thoughtless.
But for me it was partly a delayed reaction, but mostly a lack of physical evidence to make it real for me; I'm guessing that's pretty odd!



zeldapsychology
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06 Apr 2011, 3:44 pm

Mar1976 wrote:
It's just how you process information I guess, so not "odd" to you.

I find I don't react to bad news the way most people do until I think about it intensly or see the evidence; like you said until you got the information straight from your Mum you didn't believe it.

The following will probably sound heartless (my reaction to the situation), but I only 'processed' and 'made real' the situation, right at the last minute when it could have been too late.

A member of my family was ill and taken to hospital urgently from the GP practise; I was called to say what had happened and was worried, but sort of went on with my life; I called every day to check that everything was ok, but did nothing else.

I think a whole week past and it was then explained to me that they were very, very lucky that it had been spotted because the outcome could have been fatal and they still weren't 'out of the woods' yet. It was only then that I realised that I was expected to be there (I live some distance from my family).
So, I made the trip, arrived at the hospital, greeted with some disgusted looks from the family who were visiting them, saw my ill relative lying in the hospital bed with an oxygen 'mask' on, tubes coming out of their arm looking vulnerable and half the person I knew; it was THEN I got a lump in my throat and reality struck.

I'm guessing that some of my family probably think I was heartless, selfish and thoughtless.
But for me it was partly a delayed reaction, but mostly a lack of physical evidence to make it real for me; I'm guessing that's pretty odd!


Thanks for the story. :-)



another_1
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06 Apr 2011, 3:52 pm

Mar1976 wrote:

I think a whole week past and it was then explained to me that they were very, very lucky that it had been spotted because the outcome could have been fatal and they still weren't 'out of the woods' yet. It was only then that I realised that I was expected to be there (I live some distance from my family).


Their fault for not making the gravity of the situation clear to begin with. There are MANY things which can truly require an "urgent" trip to the hospital but be a simple matter of treatment and recovery once the trip is made.

But you're not completely blameless, either. When (s)he didn't come home in a day or two, you should have directly asked how serious it was. Neither side should have waited a week to clarify the circumstances.

I hope your relative made a full recovery - and that you never have to face a similar situation. If you do, however, you'll know to ask for details soomer.



daydreamer84
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06 Apr 2011, 11:01 pm

I think I would react exactly the same way. I have delayed but very extreme emotional reactions to some things. I don't think it was at all odd to think it was a joke if it came from someone who is a habitual joker.



Verdandi
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06 Apr 2011, 11:13 pm

This reaction seems normal to me.



raisedbyignorance
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06 Apr 2011, 11:19 pm

zeldapsychology wrote:
This falls under the show emotions differently part of AS so I thought it fit here. Dad called (to check on the pool being built) and said he totalled his jeep. I said no way and took it as a joke (since he is a morbid jokester. At one time he said tell mom the light is green when it's red and she'll go.) So ya odd since of humour there. Mom came home and said he was in a wreck so I believed it finally then I cried and was emotional and upset. I am thankful he's ok but OMG! he could have rolled or been thrown out or died!! SHEESH!! ! FOR GOD SAKE THE MAN DOESN'T WEAR HIS SEATBELT! I am thankful he's ok but am also shocked too. I had an aunt die in a wreck as a child and feel OMG! wow! dad survived when IMO he should be dead! Is this delayed reaction or this reaction an issue at all? Thank You WP members. :-)


I don't see it as an odd reaction. It's common for people to be in denial when something bad or serious is happening and knowing your father, it is understandable why you didn't believe him right away. It's a bit of a "cry wolf" scenario.