In need of social skills therapy, anyone have advice?

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Unfortunately I haven't any friends or family to do it for "free". Looking online for solutions to being trapped and alone, it seemed to be the one thing that has proven successful in saving us whom have nothing from losing everything. The only problem is I can't afford professional help.

Where can I turn? I'm apposed to churches because of their strongly judgmental predispositions and I'm too old for an autism clinic or group, my town only has services for children. DSHS might be able to find me financial help, but they don't have anything for personal issues.

I'm so lost!

http://www.wired.com/wired/archive/9.12/aqtest.html
AQ Score: 42
Apparantly.. 32 or higher is considered autistic.

http://www.queendom.com/tests/access_pa ... gTest=3037
Emotional IQ score = 55
Subscale percentile = 0.13

According to your self-report answers, your emotional intelligence is very poor. People who score like you do feel that they have trouble dealing with their own emotions and those of others. They struggle to overcome difficulties in their lives and they are unable to control their moods. It's hard for them to understand how best to motivate themselves and reach their goals. In addition, they find social interactions quite difficult, for several reasons. They may have trouble allowing themselves to get close with others, finding it difficult to be vulnerable enough to establish intimacy. They also report having trouble offering support to others, likely due to the fact that they do not understand where others are coming from or they lack ideas about how best to help. Perhaps by working on your problem areas, you can become more confident in dealing with your own emotions and those of others.

http://www.okcupid.com/results/the-broa ... _aloof=108
Autistic/BAP Phenotype test: You scored 108 aloof, 92 rigid and 121 pragmatic
You scored above the cutoff on all three scales. Clearly, you are either autistic or on the broader autistic phenotype. You probably are not very social, and when you do interact with others, you come off as strange or rude without meaning to. You probably also like things to be familiar and predictable and don't like changes, especially unexpected ones.

What do you want?

I get the feeling you're feeling socially isolated and want to do something to address that? And in addition, you can't do that because you lack the requisite skills to make meaningful social connections and keep those up in a way that fulfills you?

Respond to that and maybe we can give you some help. If I'm correct, elaborate and let us know perhaps what you've tried, where you're at, where you think you'd need to be to feel better about things.

If you had a special interest you could join a club.

I surf and always meet new people at the beach. I never take it further but could have a few times.

I know heaps of people with poor skills who dont mind getting rejected every now and then, so are really quite outgoing. Finding a place to go where people are kinder always helps.

You might be a good dancer. Men are really in demand at dance schools

before they dropped the bomb on me i had all sorts of skills, like skateboarding snowboarding and as a matter of fact, dancing. especially to dubstep and electronic music

i guess i haven't really tried anything. my neighbors invite me over to listen to music, and really pretty girls on facebook keep inviting me to parties, but when i'm anywhere i feel consciously dead, like theres nothing going on in my mind. i guess the awkward silences and not having anything to say are just too much, it takes all the joy from the experience and turns it in to feelings of uncomfortably. i told my neighbor i would come over this afternoon and listen to music, but flaked on him because i was too nervous. super hot red head invited me to her birthday tomorrow like 5 times! i think she likes me, but i think i don't like me. i still haven't replied

additionally, my skin has grown pale from being inside all the time, and my eyes have become red and have the appearance of someone who is truly lost. i used to look like fabio, now i look like dracula. in the figurative sense of the word, i am a ghost. its so shameful. i think i'm too self conscious?

people walk past me on the street, in the supermarket, and at the park. but i can never engage them. i never talk to strangers, it takes weeks of seeing someone around before i muster the balls to speak just one word

it may seem all fine and dandy, but it's really not. i cannot talk to people normally. and i desperately want to, more than anything in the whole wide world. i don't think ive had a conversation for longer than a half hour in my entire life, and its never seemed to satisfy the other person, i cant say what they want to hear :'( but on the bright side, my complaining and whining skills are getting better

So it looks like the proper term for what I'm looking for is a cognitive behavioral therapist

this is a microcosm of my entire life. i cry out for help, and get a stiff cold shoulder from the entire world. what's the point?

ok I think what you are suffering from is the same as what I am, it is what I call 'connection frustration'. Basically like sexual frustration but when any sort of real connection to another person is blocked, not just sexual connections. It is completely maddening. It is the feeling of being so close yet so far ALL THE TIME. Talking to people for a few minutes and then 'running away' either literally or inside yourself by shutting down. A hot girl asks you to her birthday, and you have every reason to go, but you dont. (I'm assuming) Then you start to feel pathetic or crazy. "People are friendly to me, there are so many people that I want to be with, why can't I just be with them normally?" This is the main question that runs through your mind, and then you eventually stop asking it and become numb, because there's basically no answer.

The feeling of being what you call 'consciously dead' is what I call being like ' a deer stuck in headlights'. Completely blank, just stupid anxiousness takes over your entire mind. Is there such thing as a comfortable silence? Probably not in a party situation, because if someone isn't talking, well, theres a million other people at the party who are talking, so whats the point of being with that person. One on one and in smaller groups I believe that comfortable silences are possible, you have to become good at listening and also feeling safe saying stuff that you want to say, when the right times present themselves.

Just rambling now. Try accepting the awkwardness because fighting against it is obviously not working, maybe?