Isolating

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How long should my aspie friend be free to isolate? Is it unhealthy to choose not to interact with NTs and focus on their special interest exclusively?

um not really sure how to answer your questions but just one thing that might be relevant is that responding to contact might be easier than making contact for your aspie friend. Like, it doesn't usually occur to me to call my friends but when they call me it's good.

It's not unhealthy as long as the person is content being that way...it's really up to the person to decide whether they want to interact with NTs or not.
However, too much isolation can lead to other problems in themselves, like social anxiety and agoraphobia...and I know this from personal experience.

Give them time to have their breaks from hanging out with NT's. It can be really exhausting being around you lot. My friend is constantly inviting me to gigs, even after we just went to one. I have to get tough and say 'look, I can only go to one gig a month.'
I've got severe sensory issues and barely say a word to my NT friends when I'm like that, so I feel it's pointless. It always stresses me out and makes me doubt myself so I'm better on my own.

Thanks for your helpful replies. Helps me be patient.

Q1: I don't know the age of your friend but the special interest will be one day maybe his occupation. The question is more what can fill a life and what makes them happy. So let them as long as they like, it's part of him and that's okay. It's nothing wrong on obsessions.

Q2: I have an Aspie friend on facebook and he posted a few weeks ago something. He told there that his thirst for knowledge is infinite. But he fears one day he will be lonely, he fears people will leave him one day because he can't show them that he likes them and that they are important for them.
As long as they have friends it's okay, it doesn't matter if they are NT's or Aspies. But if they really want close friends and they doesn't know how to keep them and how to get in contact with them I think they can feel quite lonely. The more often they feel misunderstood, communication fails and that leads to losing friends, pain and disappointments they probably give up one day just because they think no one really wants them. They probably just don't realise that it's only based on misunderstandings and that is just sad and they suffer through this. I don't think Aspies have that poor communication skills, I think they are only different with communication. So people see sometimes the rational and honest answers as hurtful even it is not meant that way.
Therefore I think it's important to explain who they are and that there are problems in communication. Once I had an online friend and we talked for a few weeks almost every day a bit. Then he told me something, I saw this as a total rejection and I was hurt. I didn't understand it that time. It caused a lot of trouble. I thought I lose them as a friend so I tried to talk with them all the time. I ran behind them and annoyed them. One misunderstanding led to the next trouble and now we just can't talk anymore. He thinks I'm still clingy but actually my actions wasn't clinginess, they were my desperate try to show them loyalty and how much I like them. Now I understand but now it's probably too late. Things went too uncomfortable and too emotional. Every communication fails and I have no idea what to do.

If your friend thinks it's okay to have only a few friends it's alright. I know some Aspies who don't need people. Everyone is different. So you should ask your friend if he feels comfortable that way and if yes it's okay. I would like to recommend the books 'Look me in the eye' and 'be different' from John Elder Robison if you haven't read it yet. It helped me a lot to understand.

Sorry that I replied that late, I got a migraine and then I really can't think If there's something still wrong with my expression you can blame the rest of my migraine.

Your reply was insightful. Thank you for your candidness. Much appreciated.

My friend is a middle-aged adult and his preoccupation is his occupation. He works from home. And his work fulfills him and makes him happy.

The fear of "aloneness" is one I deal with also. I don't often have friends I consider close. So when my friend withdraws, which we've talked about at length and I understand his need to do so, I feel a sense of rejection, even though I know that is a lie. He simply needs to be by himself for a while. And I need to get over myself and fill my life with other interests. Yet, it's important to occasionally connect and let him know I value him as a friend.

I hope things will turn around for you and your friend. Thanks for the book recommendations. I have read "Look Me In the Eye" but not his other book.

Your reply was not too late. You obviously gave it some thought before you responded. I thank you for that.

Thank you as well.
Yeah right I see you understood what I mean. I post sometimes things on Twitter for him to show him that I still care but I don't even know if it's the right way and I don't know if he ever read them. It maybe let me look to them as I still would be too clingy. Otherwise I fear if I totally stop he probably could think I gave up on him so I really don't know.
I just try to be true to myself, what I feel and think.

But thanks for your wishes. I won't give up I hope the key is patience, to affirm them and to wait.

I'm since a few weeks diagnosed on the autistic spectrum as well with a very, very mild form. So actually I'm quite confused and don't know really where I belong to. I'm married and have a son. Many people struggle with social fears and I had them as well as I was a child and during my time as an adolescent. I think Aspies shouldn't give up on people. Maybe they need to make them to one of their special interest, I think they can learn how to interact from the rational side as well. It's probably very hard but it must be possible. I read a lot of things about it. Basically it needs a positive setting on life and support from friends I think and then everything is possible. Never accept boundaries, we grow every day in life.
My Aspie score is 156/200 and my NT score is 58/200. It explains my life and some things I struggled with and I probably still do.

Wish you good luck and best wishes