Useless advice from NT's

Post Reply New Topic

See if you can come up with any, just for kicks...I have quite a few down below...the question is, are the people giving us this advice naive, or just being polite?? The unfortunate thing is, in the past I've actually gotten some of these from psychiatrists.

#1 - "Just be yourself. If people don't accept you for who they are, they're not worth it."

#2 - "Well, everyone's different in some way...imagine how boring the world would be if we were all the same."

#3 - "Well, I reallly think you just need to listen to what people are REALLY telling you."

#4 - "Well, I've noticed that when you're really interested in something, you seem to be good at it...so just try that approach with other things."

#5 - "You can do these things if you really want to - some people just need to try harder than others."

Contrast #5 above with #6 & #7 below:

#6 - "Well, I think you sometimes just need to stop trying so hard when [insert social situation here], just let it come naturally to you."

#7 - "Try to not overanalyze things so much - sometimes you just need to go with your gut instinct."

#8 - "Well, some people are really good at some things, and some people are really good at other things, so don't let it bother you."

#9 - (This was said by a job counsellor when I asked whether I should disclose Aspergers at an interview; I was between jobs at the time) "Well...I really think you need to get _a feel_ for how they _might_ react if you were to tell them that, then just go with your gut." (I held my laughter just long enough for when I got out of her office.)

#10 - any given religious leader: "I think G** has special plans for you"

So, again I ask the question...are they being naive, or just polite???
I am successful today with a house, wife/daughter, career, and some friends - I still have my struggles, but I don't think my life would have turned out so well if I took the "cliche advice" above.

I get tired of hearing cliche inspirational comments ad nauseum as well. I have a system where I just shake my head in agreement while simultaneously erasing the event from my mind.

Only 10 sucks.

I've heard all of those things plenty. Especially the god one. *gag*

Actually, being myself does come easily to me, and I get a lot of respect these days. The rest of the advice is useless to me.

I've given myself most of this advice in the last couple of months since I worked out who I was.
Then found the fatal flaw in each line. So far my best idea - one I've been working on for several
years now - is this:

"Go home. Stay home."

I suppose I can't blame unversed NTs for thinking the same things I thought, of myself

How about...

I think sometimes they really believe that this applies to most people and is genuinely helpful. Like # 3 4 5 6 7 and 9, that's the kind of stuff people seem to honestly believe helps you specifically because well, it works for them. They can't imagine that someone can simply not have those same instincts and gut reactions to call upon.

The rest sound like the usual drivel platitudes people spout because they want to give you advice and hope, but have no clue what to say and don't want to admit that (which is odd since admitting that I really don't have good advice but it sounds like what they're going through sucks seems to make people say I'm a good friend for listening - perhaps some double standard I'm not sensing?). So it's easier for them to use a standard cliche. Even if it's about as helpful as a hard drive to a penguin.