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Kaelynn
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17 Aug 2011, 6:27 pm

I started my frist day of high school today and at my school most of every one there is an aspie. I really thought I would like the other aspies but I dont. They are just weird. They talk about video games and Xbox and things like that and I dont know why. But thats all they seem to know how to talk about. I want to be friends with them and stuff but I know nothing about video games and stuff so I dont know what to say to them. It also doesnt help that Im the only girl aspie in the class but I still wanna be friends with them. Not really sure what to do.


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17 Aug 2011, 6:46 pm

Kaelynn wrote:
I started my frist day of high school today and at my school most of every one there is an aspie. I really thought I would like the other aspies but I dont. They are just weird. They talk about video games and Xbox and things like that and I dont know why. But thats all they seem to know how to talk about. I want to be friends with them and stuff but I know nothing about video games and stuff so I dont know what to say to them. It also doesnt help that Im the only girl aspie in the class but I still wanna be friends with them. Not really sure what to do.



There were likely a few other individuals in some of my classes who also had AS and we got along fine. Most of the time we did not talk about video games....come to think about it, I don't really recall what we talked about. I guess I wasn't paying attention.



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17 Aug 2011, 7:16 pm

Depends on weither or not they share an obsession or speical intrest of mine. Most of my friends on Deviant Art are other people with AS who have a Sonic obsession. Obsessions have and will always be my strongest AS trait. It's nice to have an obsession and be able to actualy find things related to it in stores again and unlike in 1994, I can actualy buy them and not have to beg. The best part? Not being told to shut up about it all the time or told I need to "widen my horizons" all the time. I'm allowed to have an obsession as an adult. I never had a happy childhood mostly because of bullies and being rushed back and forth from shrink to shrink but also because I was never allowed to talk about what made me happy.


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17 Aug 2011, 7:52 pm

Come to think of it, I don't think I've ever gotten along with any Aspies in person. The ones I've met were always too immature for me and didn't care what people thought of them, where as I'm the complete opposite. I've gone through horrible bullying in the past and I think too much of what people think of me because of it.

I totally get it about the obsessions. My friends have always learned to put up with me whenever I get into something because they know that it's easier to go along with it than to just try to deal with it. It's been like that for me my entire life. Personally, I think that my obsessions have made things happier for me. Even during my hardest years, all I have to do is look back at something I was into and that always brings back good memories.



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17 Aug 2011, 8:00 pm

I know how you feel. It sucks that I dunno any other aspies other than guys who are obsessed with gaming and getting girlfriends all the time. It puts me the girl in a very uncomfortable situation of not knowing when Aspie guys are genuinely trying to be my friend or are seeking me as a potential love interest.



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17 Aug 2011, 8:03 pm

Not all aspies are obsessed with video games.

I, however, am not one of those aforementioned aspies.


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17 Aug 2011, 8:18 pm

Most teenage boys talk a lot about video games. I don't think this is an aspie exclusive thing. The problem is most likely that you are in a classroom of all males and don't share male interests.



ion
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17 Aug 2011, 8:41 pm

Kaelynn wrote:
I want to be friends with them and stuff but I know nothing about video games and stuff so I dont know what to say to them. It also doesnt help that Im the only girl aspie in the class but I still wanna be friends with them. Not really sure what to do.


Best way to get a friend is to be a friend. Talk about video games Everybody likes themselves and love when someone is willing to listen to them talk about themselves or what they enjoy. Ask them about video games, then you'll learn about video games. Listening to a lot of things that don't interest you and pretending to care is an important social skill. It builds rapport.

Also boys will also love a girl who's interested in what they like...


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17 Aug 2011, 9:13 pm

ion wrote:
Kaelynn wrote:
I want to be friends with them and stuff but I know nothing about video games and stuff so I dont know what to say to them. It also doesnt help that Im the only girl aspie in the class but I still wanna be friends with them. Not really sure what to do.


Best way to get a friend is to be a friend. Talk about video games Everybody likes themselves and love when someone is willing to listen to them talk about themselves or what they enjoy. Ask them about video games, then you'll learn about video games. Listening to a lot of things that don't interest you and pretending to care is an important social skill. It builds rapport.

Also boys will also love a girl who's interested in what they like...

She shouldn't have to settle if she doesn't want to. I was in a class with all boys three times and it really sucked so I completely understand where she's coming from.



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17 Aug 2011, 9:23 pm

SammichEater wrote:
Not all aspies are obsessed with video games.

I, however, am not one of those aforementioned aspies.


Haha, well played.

Neither am I.

buryuntime wrote:
Most teenage boys talk a lot about video games. I don't think this is an aspie exclusive thing. The problem is most likely that you are in a classroom of all males and don't share male interests.


I don't think there's really "male interests" and "female" interests. I know enough women who are as into video games as I am (which is good, as I find a lot of gamer guys to be pretty hard to get along with, usually due to their assumptions about female gamers - like, say, me).



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17 Aug 2011, 9:58 pm

Quote:
I don't think there's really "male interests" and "female" interests. I know enough women who are as into video games as I am (which is good, as I find a lot of gamer guys to be pretty hard to get along with, usually due to their assumptions about female gamers - like, say, me).


So I guess you just play the Sims and stuff?


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17 Aug 2011, 9:59 pm

Kaelynn wrote:
I started my frist day of high school today and at my school most of every one there is an aspie. I really thought I would like the other aspies but I dont. They are just weird. They talk about video games and Xbox and things like that and I dont know why. But thats all they seem to know how to talk about. I want to be friends with them and stuff but I know nothing about video games and stuff so I dont know what to say to them. It also doesnt help that Im the only girl aspie in the class but I still wanna be friends with them. Not really sure what to do.


It was only the first day right? It takes more than one day to make a friend in my experience. As time goes on you might find you actually do have some interests in common with at least a few of your classmates!


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17 Aug 2011, 10:41 pm

Kaelynn wrote:
I started my frist day of high school today and at my school most of every one there is an aspie. I really thought I would like the other aspies but I dont. They are just weird. They talk about video games and Xbox and things like that and I dont know why. But thats all they seem to know how to talk about. I want to be friends with them and stuff but I know nothing about video games and stuff so I dont know what to say to them. It also doesnt help that Im the only girl aspie in the class but I still wanna be friends with them. Not really sure what to do.


People are people first. The same idiosyncrasies are present in AS that tend towards different social behavior. I'm starting to realize being around more NT types I am a lot happier. When I find people like myself they tend to annoy and I can't connect. Someone mentioned here, it's great when your interests coincide, then the worlds we all live in become shared, and it's more comfortable but since we all have differing interests that's more the exception rather than the rule.

Are we destined to live in our own little worlds? I hope not. It gets lonely in here. I have one good friend that I swear is on the edge. She's an NT type, but man she understands me so well, and I swear she has a touch of AS in her. She has one of those quick witted personalities and she's so very brilliant. I guess I'm saying I'm lucky to have found a "professor of the humanities". She's helped me a great deal.



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18 Aug 2011, 5:20 am

Kaelynn wrote:
I started my frist day of high school today and at my school most of every one there is an aspie.

"I've told you a million times..."


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18 Aug 2011, 5:32 am

Once you learn a little more about the high school itself - the students, teachers, classes, activities, random mystery stories about what supposedly goes on in that high school! - you can start and join conversations about that. It usually becomes a topic of interested in the first couple of days when everybody new feels a little less lost and excited.


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18 Aug 2011, 6:14 am

Phonic wrote:
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I don't think there's really "male interests" and "female" interests. I know enough women who are as into video games as I am (which is good, as I find a lot of gamer guys to be pretty hard to get along with, usually due to their assumptions about female gamers - like, say, me).


So I guess you just play the Sims and stuff?


Interesting, waiting to see how this will turn out :P.

Anyway i do think the term gamer is vague. When i think of a gamer its someone who plays multiplayer on a fairly competitive level and finds singleplayer fun on harder game modes. If you play on normal/easy modes and never top the scores in multiplayer then you can still be called a gamer but there is a clear difference with the above group. A gamer has to have skill in the games he plays in my mind.