Do you hate sarcasm when you don't understand it?

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artrat
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10 Feb 2012, 6:23 pm

I can only understand sarcasm when it is painfully obvious but don't really like it.
I see it as a way to indirectly insult another person. I thought that this was an aspie thing but WP is very sarcastic.

It makes me feel stupid when I don't understand it. Then I ask the person to explain it and I become humiliated.
I try not to use sarcasm when speaking to another person because it is impolite and insulting.

I have trained myself to understand some sarcasm but it is still hard and hurtful.


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OliveOilMom
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10 Feb 2012, 6:35 pm

I understand it most of the time, and I enjoy sarcasm. It's not usually meant to be insulting towards me, and sometimes it's jokingly insulting towards me or someone else. I don't see why you should be humiliated on here by asking what someone's sarcastic remark means though. Lot's of us AS folks don't get sarcasm much at all, and of those that do, we don't always get it.


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League_Girl
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10 Feb 2012, 6:36 pm

I wasn't aware there was lot of sarcasm here. Could you be interpreting it that way?

Sarcasm used to upset me but it doesn't much anymore. It upset me because I didn't know someone was being sarcastic until I read aspies are upset by it so I realized I was just making it worse by being upset by it so I stopped so I could be less aspie.

Only time it upsets me if the person uses it too much because I feel they aren't taking me seriously and everything I say is a joke to them. Some sarcasm is very hurtful and it's hard to even think of examples. But what's even more frustrating is when the person who is doing it doesn't even get how hurtful it is so they think something is wrong with you and you need to toughen up. Must be the lack of TOM on their part.



mackieG13
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10 Feb 2012, 6:41 pm

Yeah, I hate sarcasm



CockneyRebel
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10 Feb 2012, 8:39 pm

Being a sensitive soul, I'm very bothered by it because it seems like a lack of respect in a world where there's not very much respect any more. I've tried very hard not to let it get to me, but I can't seem to be able to do it.


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emtyeye
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10 Feb 2012, 8:41 pm

I don't like sarcasm in interpersonal dialog either. Also, I have not been aware of there being a lot of it here on WP, so maybe I'm not picking it up (?).

Verbal irony is another thing I miss all the time. In fact, I only really learned what it is and began to notice people using it very recently. Then to my horror, had to wonder how many times I had said something being completely honest, and had it taken as being ironic. How ironic, I guess.


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SammichEater
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10 Feb 2012, 8:49 pm

I love sarcasm. I mean, hell, how else do you respond to statements like "It's really nice outside today?"

"No really? Gee, I thought it was snowing."


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artrat
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10 Feb 2012, 8:58 pm

League_Girl wrote:
I wasn't aware there was lot of sarcasm here. Could you be interpreting it that way?

Sarcasm used to upset me but it doesn't much anymore. It upset me because I didn't know someone was being sarcastic until I read aspies are upset by it so I realized I was just making it worse by being upset by it so I stopped so I could be less aspie.

Only time it upsets me if the person uses it too much because I feel they aren't taking me seriously and everything I say is a joke to them. Some sarcasm is very hurtful and it's hard to even think of examples. But what's even more frustrating is when the person who is doing it doesn't even get how hurtful it is so they think something is wrong with you and you need to toughen up. Must be the lack of TOM on their part.

What was said to me in the art/writing and music forum was sarcasm. I have seen a lot of it especially toward people that are not very well liked.


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10 Feb 2012, 9:02 pm

I don't use much sarcasm and almost none directed at others. The only sarcasm I occasionally use is directed at myself. I often don't pick up on sarcasm directed by others at me.



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10 Feb 2012, 9:34 pm

Sarcasm on WP...may as well enter a blank post.
Most of the arguments here happen when someone misinterprets sarcasm.

I either don't do it or make it painfully obvious.

I agree though, some sarcasm is a way to directly insult someone. Or even when a person thinks it's gone too far they just say 'I was just joking.'

I usually do interpret it as an insult if I don't get it.


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Alexender
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10 Feb 2012, 9:44 pm

I can use sarcasm, I have been told that it is completely obvious when I use it (I don't use it online almost at all.

But if someone else uses it even if I get it I usually ask if they were joking.



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11 Feb 2012, 1:50 am

SammichEater wrote:
I love sarcasm. I mean, hell, how else do you respond to statements like "It's really nice outside today?"

"No really? Gee, I thought it was snowing."



If I agree with them, I usually say something like "f**k yeah it is! This rules! Let's go do something!"



justalouise
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11 Feb 2012, 1:51 am

I could go either way with sarcasm, although I am getting better at picking it up since moving to Canada.

Sometimes it bothers me because it's so insincere in nature. I think sincerity and earnestness are both sorely lacking these days.



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11 Feb 2012, 1:53 am

It's hard for me to understand people, but it's not hard for me to understand sarcasm. My earliest memory is sarcastic. I prefer men to women because women are sometimes not so expressive for different reasons, and I found males more likely to use humour and sarcasm in communication.


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kestrel
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11 Feb 2012, 5:05 am

I get irked when I miss sarcasm - online, I think, it's harder to pick up because there is no vocal intonation. I've gotten rather good at picking that up, but not everyone has any inflection to their voices when they're being sarcastic. When I miss sarcasm and respond normally, I just keep talking even after realizing my mistake and try to pretend nothing weird happened. :P This might be why many people get annoyed with me. That, and the fact that I'm just plain boring.

Whenever I try to use sarcasm, I think I do it wrong - I put it as dryly, and as true to the thing I'm attempting to criticize as possible, and people often think my sarcastic statements are actually my positions, which just confuses everyone including me. :? So I should probably stop doing that.



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11 Feb 2012, 5:32 am

People mistake my sarcasm for seriousness as well, but I don't want to *have* to note my sarcasm in a special way for them.


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