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Wtxger
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27 Aug 2019, 7:29 am

I woke up this morning tired (again), despite sleeping more than 6 hours.
My mind is racing and jumping between trying to figure myself out, how to show my wife I love her, and how to manage my life. In the end my overall conclusion is I struggle with all of it. I spent a good deal of time yesterday trying to find information about genetic proof for my ASD and lack of empathy (went through my 23 and me raw data).
My wife has told me “if you decide you want to do something you can do it, you choose what you can do and what you don’t want to do”.
It is true if I somehow convince myself that something is important I will obsess and research everything I can get a hold of, but some things seem taboo to me (organizing my closet, working on our finances, paying bills, finishing projects, basically all the “important” things, or things that “need to be done”). I usually respond “I don’t know how to do that”, that may be true, but it does not apply if I am trying to figure out how to do a valve adjustment on an engine, or research an odd syndrome or disease.
I sometimes think my obsession could be an advantage if I could just channel it the right direction, but somehow that does not work and I end up looking like a jerk who just does whatever he chooses and likes to do. I think it is the combination of ADHD and OCD in my profile, but that sounds like an excuse ( and I always “have excuses”)
I struggle, anybody else? Any ideas or suggestions?



ToughDiamond
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27 Aug 2019, 4:37 pm

Contrary to what Disney movies tell us, I don't think people can achieve absolutely anything they want to. Maybe it would be worth asking your wife what it is that she wants you to do, assuming that's what's behind her assertion about you. Then it's a matter of deciding whether you want to do it, and if so, whether or not you know how to do it. If you don't know how, maybe ask her if she knows how. Just my 2 cents.



Dear_one
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27 Aug 2019, 6:15 pm

I can direct my time into more or less productive jobs to a fair extent, but I can't turn into an extrovert, able to handle unlimited human contact. I have many unfinished projects, but I have gotten far enough into them to see the unsatisfactory end, or a problem I want to resolve before proceeding. As I work, I may think of so many improvements that I'd rather start over. Having a helper who is still keen to finish what they started is very helpful there. There is also an array of mental blocks and quirks based on the luck I've had. Those are somewhat malleable, by the usual techniques and/or logic.