Page 2 of 3 [ 37 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3  Next

edgewaters
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Aug 2006
Age: 47
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,427
Location: Ontario

04 May 2012, 9:16 am

Shadewraith wrote:
I hate shaking hands with people, or even touching people for that matter. I'll usually wash my hands or use hand sanitizer right after, even if they're in front of me.


There was a big public health campaign here against hand-shaking, trying to make it more acceptable to refuse, a few years ago when they had the swine flu. It's mostly vanished now, I haven't seen any of the ads or posters in a long time.



AScomposer13413
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Feb 2012
Age: 27
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,191
Location: Canada

04 May 2012, 9:23 am

Kurgan wrote:
They're either shocked, offended, both of the aforementioned or they think it's extremely funny that I just said that.


MeshugenahMama wrote:
FishStickNick wrote:
I don't know if it's things I say that get me in trouble so much as it's things I don't say that make me come across as rude at times. I've also gotten flack at work for seeming to not pay attention in meetings and such.


I get in trouble on both ends. I say things that I am not supposed to and don't say the things that I am supposed to. It is not unusual for me to be in a situation where I know that there is something that I am most likely supposed to say-but I don't know what, and generally guess wrong.


I get a mix of the quoted passages. The odd time out, I'll get an explanation as to why it was rude, but for the most part, I'm left in the dark about it :?



Rascal77s
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Nov 2011
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,795

04 May 2012, 11:38 am

I guess my avatar is considered rude, I don't see it that way. In general my 'rudeness' is either honesty or lack of political correctness.



Wandering_Stranger
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Apr 2012
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,316

04 May 2012, 1:04 pm

Kurgan wrote:
They're either shocked, offended, both of the aforementioned or they think it's extremely funny that I just said that.


I remember a few years ago, an Aspie friend of mine said something which really upset me. Originally, I said nothing, thinking I was overreacting. A few days later, I told him he upset me. To which he replied with "I know what I said to you. But that's how it sometimes feels". I was a bit shocked and was hoping for an apology.

if I have upset / offended anyone, they've not said anything.



League_Girl
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 23,827
Location: Pacific Northwest

04 May 2012, 2:29 pm

One time my husband told me the story about when we first met at a coffee shop and I told him he was fat. I was shocked I said that and I wondered if he was mistaking but he told me I really did tell him that. I started asking for details like how did it come out of my mouth, what we were talking about, how soon did I say it, and he told me when he asked me what I thought of him, I told him "you're fat." I stopped laughing and said "oh no wonder I said that, you asked for my opinion" and he told me I was not supposed to say that to him and I told him he asked me what I thought of him, what was I supposed to say and he told me "you were supposed to say 'you're okay.'" He said that was how he knew I was innocent and there was something different about me because I didn't understand why he got upset. I asked him "what?" when he had an expression on his face.

Another time not too long ago I was trying to be politically correct but my aspie friend knew what I meant. I told him maybe the reason why depends didn't fit him right was due to his size. He goes "I am not fat Beth." I asked him how did he know what I meant and he told me I have told him before he is fat and I asked him when and he said when we first started talking in 2004, he showed me a photo oh himself and I said he was fat. I was shocked with myself again. Do I really tell people they are fat?

Sometimes I shock myself. It's as if I get my moments or something like a tic where I say something wrong and I full well know it's wrong but it comes out. Then I am back to censoring myself again until I have my moment again. I once caught myself telling my aid how fat she is in high school so I stopped talking but I got a lecture about it anyway from another student. Then in my senior year of high school, mom was saying how thin this boy is and I blurted out "No he's fat" and then I realized what I had just said and he was right there in the room. Instead mom burst out laughing and the boy wasn't hurt so I moved on and got over the embarrassment. Mom told me he was not fat and it's all muscle and asked me to feel. She said he was crying but he was laughing. My habit of correcting people and it just slipped out of my mouth.


Mom used to get mad at me for telling people they are fat but now she laughs about it. She tells me I really need to think before I speak. I think it's more of an ADD thing because I still act on impulse sometimes so things come out of my mouth before I even think. It was worse when I was a kid and needed therapy for it so I could control it better. If I know something is wrong to say and I say it without helping it, ADD. If I say something and had no idea it was wrong to say it, AS. That is the difference between those two.



Matt62
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jan 2012
Age: 58
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,235

04 May 2012, 2:43 pm

I get in trouble because I could not be politically correct if they paid me to be.. and that is only one thing. Of course, I grew up in the "me" decade of the 1970's so...
Oh, and I have a bad time NOT speaking truth to power to supervisors at jobs. Hey, if you did not want an honest opinion, you would not have aske *ME* because that is all I ever give. I have stepped on toes in the past, by making observations on buying parrots (for example) when a bird shop/breeder owner was five steps away. However, it was sound advice, in general..
These conversation rules are so confusing. Most people think I am rude because I tend not to talk that much anyway..

Sincerely,
Matthew



bumble
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Mar 2011
Age: 44
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,112

04 May 2012, 4:27 pm

PaintingDiva wrote:
I have told some hard truths in my time and people either welcome it or they put up their shield and write me off...

No one and I do pretty much mean no one in the NT world wants to be told that Emperor is not wearing clothes.....



Oh no, I think they know the Emperor is not wearing any clothes but they are all trying not to embarrass the man by pointing it out. In a way though it is probably more embarrassing for him to let him continue on his merry way without saying anything.

Either way the poor Emperor is made to look foolish.



FishStickNick
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Apr 2012
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,298
Location: Right here, silly!

04 May 2012, 7:53 pm

MeshugenahMama wrote:
FishStickNick wrote:
I don't know if it's things I say that get me in trouble so much as it's things I don't say that make me come across as rude at times. I've also gotten flack at work for seeming to not pay attention in meetings and such.


I get in trouble on both ends. I say things that I am not supposed to and don't say the things that I am supposed to. It is not unusual for me to be in a situation where I know that there is something that I am most likely supposed to say-but I don't know what, and generally guess wrong.

Following up on this...the one thing that has gotten me in trouble now and then is that I can be very blunt at times. I don't think it helps my political standing at work.



billypony
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 27 Dec 2010
Age: 26
Gender: Female
Posts: 69

04 May 2012, 8:10 pm

I have really laughed at what people are wearing in the past and told them how ridiculous they look and then they're usually a bit upset and they don't really say anything, and then I feel bad and realise I probobly shouldn't have said it. :/ I try not to do it anymore.



MiatheMutant
Raven
Raven

User avatar

Joined: 16 Apr 2012
Age: 27
Gender: Female
Posts: 109
Location: Hogwarts, or Vegas maybe

04 May 2012, 9:33 pm

I have the lovely combination of offending others without meaning to while I'm pretty touchy myself. I can see both sides of the situation once I realize I've said something wrong, so I apologize the vast majority of times it's my fault. However, hardly anyone does the same for me. Maybe I blow things a bit out of proportion? I don't see one side as being more rude than the other. I dunno.

I usually come across as being rude because I don't talk enough or seem like I'm ignoring someone. Several people have told me that they thought I was a stuck-up snob until they finally got me to talk to them, and now they think I'm "really nice". I just want to stand up and applaud them for judging people so thoroughly without getting to know them first. :roll:


_________________
I know that, when I finally get my dream job, my patients won't laugh at me or call me a mutant.
AQ: 159/200 NT 50/200
EQ: 14 SQ: 85 AQ: 43 Other Test: 71/72
Undiagnosed: marginal costs > marginal benefits


Mdyar
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 May 2009
Age: 55
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,514

05 May 2012, 9:26 am

I have a bunch of anecdotes.

Long time ago: Some new neighbors asked me if they were too loud. I replied: " you guys are the quiet-est people I've ever heard"

She looked at me eye to eye( she was close) and said " you smart ass."



Last edited by Mdyar on 05 May 2012, 9:44 am, edited 1 time in total.

Verdandi
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Dec 2010
Age: 50
Gender: Female
Posts: 12,587
Location: University of California Sunnydale (fictional location - Real location Olympia, WA)

05 May 2012, 9:40 am

Rascal77s wrote:
I guess my avatar is considered rude, I don't see it that way. In general my 'rudeness' is either honesty or lack of political correctness.


Your avatar is rude? Weird.

I am not sure there is really a distinction between "lack of political correctness" and being rude.



XFilesGeek
Forum Moderator
Forum Moderator

User avatar

Joined: 24 Jul 2010
Age: 36
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,499
Location: The Oort Cloud

05 May 2012, 11:36 am

Rascal77s wrote:
I guess my avatar is considered rude, I don't see it that way. In general my 'rudeness' is either honesty or lack of political correctness.


Sticking up the middle finger is considered a rude gesture among humans in certain cultures.

I don't see how that could possible apply to a chimpanzee. Chimpanzees have no concept that sticking up their middle fingers is "rude" in certain human cultures.

Your avatar isn't "rude," except to people who anthropomorphize non-human animals.


_________________
"If we fail to anticipate the unforeseen or expect the unexpected in a universe of infinite possibilities, we may find ourselves at the mercy of anyone or anything that cannot be programmed, categorized or easily referenced."

-XFG (moderator)


League_Girl
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 23,827
Location: Pacific Northwest

05 May 2012, 1:43 pm

Mdyar wrote:
I have a bunch of anecdotes.

Long time ago: Some new neighbors asked me if they were too loud. I replied: " you guys are the quiet-est people I've ever heard"

She looked at me eye to eye( she was close) and said " you smart ass."



I don't get it.



League_Girl
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Feb 2010
Gender: Female
Posts: 23,827
Location: Pacific Northwest

05 May 2012, 1:47 pm

XFilesGeek wrote:
Rascal77s wrote:
I guess my avatar is considered rude, I don't see it that way. In general my 'rudeness' is either honesty or lack of political correctness.


Sticking up the middle finger is considered a rude gesture among humans in certain cultures.

I don't see how that could possible apply to a chimpanzee. Chimpanzees have no concept that sticking up their middle fingers is "rude" in certain human cultures.

Your avatar isn't "rude," except to people who anthropomorphize non-human animals.


My cousin posted the Easter picture of my son on my Facebook wall someone else took, her or my parents or her dad or mother, I don't know who took the photo, but she posted it on my wall and part of the picture was cut off so it looked like he was flipping the camera off because he had his hand out.

I decided to use it as my cover photo and this time, more of the picture shows and it doesn't look like anymore he is flipping the camera off.