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Ettina
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28 Jun 2012, 11:34 am

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I'm just wondering if it, as the psychologists summary had read, is something that may occur with specific types of objects, depending on the interests of the person, and if they have tendencies to collect items.


Yes, among the subset of autistics who steal things, chances are most will steal things of interest to them. That just stands to reason.

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Perhaps, maybe, something that could be triggered by a nagging voice that keeps reminding you that something you like is in the other room...and, some, though obviously not all, will end up giving in.


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Hearing voices is not an aspie trait either


I don't think he meant it literally. I think he meant an inner voice, a stream of thought that keeps popping up over and over.



SpiritBlooms
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28 Jun 2012, 11:47 am

aspienewbie22 wrote:
Anyhow, ramble and not the point. The point is...I have had this guy at my home LOTS. Sometimes even alone. I have NEVER had anything stolen, or if so, I have yet to find what he took.
Keep this in mind. I buy nearly all my electronics online, never enter a store for it, and I'm low-income, but I manage to buy what I need. Something so small ... the other people could easily have misplaced it and jumped to conclusions about theft. I've done that myself at times, and regretted it.

Theft is a serious charge to make against someone without proof, and could ruin your friendship. He has never stolen from you, so take that as your evidence until/unless you learn differently.



2wheels4ever
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28 Jun 2012, 11:50 am

Lying and stealing are learned behaviors, which I never fully developed. I tried to take things I was interested in only to try lying to explain how my new toys got there, I think the longest I ever got away with something was 3 days. My FBA half-brother was 'stealing' crayons to flush them down the toilet, so it's pretty much down to an interest thing if 'we' take things not in 'our' possession


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aspienewbie22
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28 Jun 2012, 8:16 pm

haha. the "hearing voices" comment cracked me up, because taking things literally is what started me down the path to figure out his deal...and after reading more and more about aspergers, there were more and more things about him that id found peculiar that suddenly had a common cause. we have gotten into some pretty HUGE arguments/fights over stuff...and now we are at a "if it is important, wait until it can be discussed in person" place.

so...no...it was not literal.

ugg...so torn. having JUST gone through the lying bit with him, and working through that, im really sensitive about dishonesty. but, i DO know he was arrested for shoplifting, he was accused of stealing from some previous roommates and banned from their house...and now this. anyhow, TBH its not the stealing per say that bothers me...its the situation. These were my friends, we were guests in their home. They filled our bellies with food and alcohol, gave us a place to stay, and even let him...a total stranger...hang out during the day while the rest of us were taking care of our own business.

i know this guy...he does not forget ANYTHING. well, not true. once he forgot which t-shirt he left at my house and didn't remember to remind me to grab something at the store. but, honestly...thats about it. i WANT to trust him. but i also dont want to be gullible, naive, and hide from the truth.

and as for checking the files? its empty, save for something i had him download from a file sharing site for me.



SpiritBlooms
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29 Jun 2012, 10:32 am

aspienewbie22 wrote:
ugg...so torn. having JUST gone through the lying bit with him, and working through that, im really sensitive about dishonesty. but, i DO know he was arrested for shoplifting, he was accused of stealing from some previous roommates and banned from their house...and now this.
That does make it more suspicious, and combined with the fact that he's said (was it bragging?) that he hasn't purchased anything in two years, you have to wonder. And yes, if you were both guests and he stole while you were there, that's bad.

It is a dilemma. It seems you might have to confront him in order to resolve it, and I think if I knew someone was stealing, especially from friends while we were guests in their house, I'd not want to associate with that person any longer, unless maybe they sought help for it, such as if it was some form of kleptomania.



Rudin
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13 Dec 2015, 7:50 am

I used to steal things, only when it had to do with my special interests.

When I was in grade 1 I got overwhelmed by the classroom so my teacher assigned the job of straightening everyone's boots. During that time, I rummaged through people's stuff to look for things related to my special interest at the time.

When I was a bit older (perhaps 7 or 8 years old) I stole things from my classroom and the local play center related to my special interest.

I also stole multiple things related to my special interest afterwards.

I am not a very good liar. I do hate when people say, "I can tell you're lying just by the look on your face.", that just shows how flawed their system is because often when they say that I am telling the truth.


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Starfoxx
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13 Dec 2015, 9:38 am

If I was you I'd let it go or just outright ask him how he got it or if he took it. Don't be judging when you ask just ask.