Tell me why it doesn't suck to have AS.....

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Most of what you said IS right. Natural aptitude IS important, though.

I DO like that last statement though.

Steve

Immunity too be manipulated by social respons, like people, school, and advertisment...
The immunity makess you maybe alone...I cannot express it in my words, so I use those of Ibsen:

Henrik ibsen: Den sterkeste mannen er han som står alene
-------->It means: The strongest menn is he who stands alone

It is a think its a thing of personal taste, but I like too be strong then weak.

Norah the good side to AS is that its you, and its who you are. If you didnt have it, you wouldnt be the same person. Forget savant skill or genius, you dont need to have those things to prove your worth to anyone . I know having it sucks most of the time, but we would not want you any different. My advice to you would be to find as many autistic friends as you can, and gain strength from spending time with them online or IRL. Maybe you can help other people through the things you never got help with yourself, and thus help end the cycle or autistic peoples lives sucking.

You think negative terms because others do - which means they are not your true thoughts.

If society didn't crame what it wanted down your throat you wouldn't think about asking as there'd be little reason to..

Conformity is dangerous - Ask a German veteran of WW2. The ability to think for yourself is extremely important

Turn your weaknesses into strengths.

If you NEED to socialise find another way, learn all the subconcious rules, expose yourself to it in doses you can take.

If you don't need to socialise find what drives you, and kick your own ass into gear.. Learn something previously unreachable..

ie: I didn't focus on maths at school, I was obsessed with words, and working people out. Nowdays studying maths is absolutely invigorating for me..

My strengths and my weaknesses are usually the same..

Sound stupid?

Think about these things: Obsession, asynchronous development, routine...

Just those 4, you can see many strengths that can come out of them, and many weaknesses, it all depends how you direct yourself.

But what about those of us Aspies who don't have this quality?

I'm not a "him", I'm a "her".

You're assuming all Aspies lack empathy. I think a lot of Aspies would disagree with you there.

WOW, I can AGREE with you! I don't lack empathy, but I might APPEAR that way at times. Just like autistics may APPEAR selfish, but aren't.

Just look at what wikipedia says about this:




Steve

I'm not sure that everyone thinks AS is wonderful. Most people are simply happy to
be aware that they have it,as it helps them to understand and cope.

The way I see it,having AS is like living in a foreign country- your native language is
obviously different from the vast majority of the population,but it's possible to learn the
language and get by.If you take WP as an example,there are many members who are
not native English speakers but they have learned the language,so they can understand and contribute.It will never be their native language,but they learned to adapt.In fact,some can speak English better than the rest of us ! Likewise,those with AS can adapt to the so-called 'NT' world. It will never be easy but it can't be impossible.

As far as your own fears about having AS are concerned Norah,maybe you DON'T have
it anyway ? Most people with AS have known they were different from childhood and
are actually relieved to at least get an explanation.It's not logical to fight against it.
(and maybe that's at least one reason why having AS doesn't always suck.The ability to think logically !)

My apologies Ms. Norah

To norahW: I think that every aspie is alone, and he has to make a personal strenght out of it.

You can still have AS even if you don't fit all of the criteria. Maybe she is confused about whether she has AS or not because she only fits most of the criteria but not all.

Ok, this is my take on it as an older person with AS or some other PDD, maybe not even AS. I wouldn't want to be cured, because I like being different. I love writing and appreciate things in a way that NT's don't. And I don't want to suddenly care about fashion, having the nicest car, judging somebody by their looks and all that other NT crap that I hear going on around me. I'm not great at socializing, but when I make a friend, it's a true blue friend that trusts me and that I can trust. Most friends that NT's have are really just acquaintances. You ever hear them talk about one another? I knew, even as a kid, that I wanted NOTHING to do with the "popular" group. They were so mean to each other. And who cares what society thinks is positive and negative? Not every NT has great social skills, a wonderful life, a big job, and is happy with himself/herself. Your own outlook on yourself, PDD or NT, has a lot to do with the quality of your life. I spent most of my life trying to fit into a NT world and now that I don't, my world is a lot better. I am truly appalled at the values that are treasured by the majority of people in this world, and I'd rather just be me. Now that I understand autism, I'm content. Cheer up

It doesn't suck because as an aspie, I automatically have something to define myself by. I mean, just look at this message board.

The fact is, being different can be cool and rewarding as long as you don't have the as*holes in the way to mess things up. The only downside to Aspie life has to be the social skills. But that really has more to do with society than with us in general...

I read this yesterday but I needed some time to formulate the response.

I'm almost twenty-four, I've lived nearly a quarter of a century with AS and I've only known about it for the past two years. It's not that I didn't know that something was different about me or that other people didn't. I was a bully-target for years, I was hated in lower school, I was in my elementary school's excuse for special ed, I underwent seemingly endless psychological testing....so obviously I was never anything nearing 'normal'.

But I didn't fret it. The bullying I learned to avoid by avoiding the world of people when I needed to. I didn't understand what was going on for a very long time and for me it did not matter. I couldo off in my head, I still do to this day but now it's something I'm likely to do at gatherings of many people as well as in situations that bother most, like being in the dentist's chair.

I feel it to be a gift. Probably because it allowed me to survive about fifteen years of abuse, neglect and total choas (I moved out at twenty-two and I'm not counting my two years at university or the years before it got really bad) and to do so while retaining some peace of mind and enough presence of mind to leave.

When I left I really had nowhere to go and beyound my first months displaced I found refuge with a couple of people, one my current boyfriend, both spectrum.

For the record I don't have any savant skills. I'm an intelligent person but I can't do anything that any other intelligent person could not do. I do have the gift of hyperfocus so I might be able to do it in a lesser amount of time.

I don't doubt that I'll eventually be able to successfully hold a job. I doubt it's going to happen in retail. That's where many of us fail but I believe that it's because the nature of retail clashes with the nature of the honest man. The honest man will know all the flaws of what he is selling and if he wears his mind on his sleeve will be unable to hide his true feelings about what he is doing. Failing in retail didn't push me to want to be neurotypical, it pushed me to pursue a field where I would be appreciated.

Also, I wanted to say that I have a social life. I know that it is possible. I didn't get it acting more neurotypical or anything of that ilk. I got because I moved to Ann Arbor, Michigan. Ann Arbor is a college town and it attracts the very intelligent and the very odd because neither feels alone or ashamed to be as he is here. It's the nature of being amongst one's own kind. I have friends, I have a boyfriend and I am happy.

Also, you won't thrive if you continue to hate this part of who you are. And if something doesn't work try a different approach.

"The mind is its own place, and in it self
Can make a Heaven of Hell, a Hell of Heaven." -- Milton