Were you bullied in high school, if so, what was it like?

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Si_82
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15 Oct 2012, 6:32 am

Yeah, I used to stim with head rocking movements quite a lot. That on top of all the other social and behavioural issues made me quite the choice target. I was picked on throughout primary school and found it so frustrating as I didn't understand how to fit in although I desperately wanted to. As I entered my teens secondary school became gradually slightly better in terms of bullying although the frustration from bullying became replaced with depression as I became more and more aware of there being something fundamentally 'wrong' with me especially in terms of social interaction.

It was usually not physical but I still found it very upsetting and confusing.

Although there were of course brighter moments, I would describe my childhood as quite an unhappy time in my life and one I (still, at 30) find upsetting to think back to.


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15 Oct 2012, 7:13 am

I've documented extensively how Junior High was hell on earth but surprisingly High School was fine. Part of that was likely because it was significantly larger and the bullies didn't see me enough to get satisfaction out of it. Plus, the "leaders" were moving into gangs and drugs so they didn't need to bully anyone. I was teased a bit but looking back I just misinterpreted it as bullying when it was only done in jest. After what happened to me in Junior High it took a L-O-N-G time to trust anyone at all and if I didn't push people away I likely would have had a relatively normal high school experience.

Pokelover14 wrote:
I did not actually get in trouble for that since there were others who said he hit me in the face and I did it in self deffence.

Here in schools there is no such thing. If you as much as lay a finger on anyone, even if they try to murder you you are equally at fault in the school's eyes so it's much easier for them since they have no future to lose. Still, looking back I should have broken the arm of the first person who attacked me even if it meant getting arrested. Again, the worst thing you can do is ignore a bully when they initially start because they will just escalate their actions. Luckily in High School I never had to worry about that happening.

eric76 wrote:
In fact, the bullies just don't seem to show up to our reunions. I wonder if they don't want people to see that they really aren't as tough as they pretended to be in school.

Except for one who looks like a gang leader, all the people I know never seem to show their face. I'm so tempted to walk up to them one on one and say "not so tough without the gang to back you up, eh %#%$?" Good thing I'm mild mannered as I could easily snap most of my former bullies like a twig today.



b9
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15 Oct 2012, 7:58 am

i was never bullied at schools. i went to schools in the psychiatric education system mainly, but i did spend about 4 years in main stream education.

i was never bullied in mainstream education.

in year 7, i went to a religious school for a few months. i passed the entry test to be admitted to the school, but from the very beginning, i had major problems with the people in authority (teachers, priests etc), and i dismissed them as idiots when i lost interest in what they were saying, and that sparked many confrontations (initiated by them i might add). and if they tried to tell me what to do, i became resistant to an extreme degree. i lasted about 3 months there, and while i was there, i payed no attention to the kids much except for the fact that i noted that they liked to witness my confrontations with teachers, and they laughed hysterically from the sidelines at the proceedings.

i was followed and watched i guess by some kids, but i was not ever interfered with by them.

at the adolescent units where i spent much of my high school life, everyone had their own problem, and no one saw me as strange, and i liked those schools very much and i hated mainstream schools because i had to follow rules that i would get punished for if i did not follow them, and then my reaction to being punished for not doing something i found inane and valueless was very hostile and the cycle spiraled out of control continuously when i was in main stream schools.

but i was not bullied and i do not know why. i was only dimly aware of other kids because they did not matter to me.



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15 Oct 2012, 8:19 am

A living nightmare to put it politely. I was bullied from grade 8 to grade 10. I had kick me signs put on my back on a daily basis and people would kick me, punch me, slap me and pinch me all the time. I had my bag thrown in the boys toliets and all of my belongings inside it thrown in the toliet. I was verbally abused and I was nearly raped in year 10 and my two friends beaten up so they could not help me, other people in the class were banging on the tables chanting rape her, rape her. They would write in pen all over the tables I hate Annette B which is my name, they also made a song up from Greese look at me Im Sandra Dee, look at me Im Annette B they used to sing that to me everytime I turned up at school in year 8. On camp I had all my belongings thrown out of the dorm I was in and I had to sleep on a cement floor outside. I ended up walking out of school and skipping classes because I couldn't handle the bullying the teachers didn't do anything about it and my grades went down I ended up failing Year 10. Year 11 and 12 wasn't bad due to the bullies were politely told to consider going to another school or find a job which they did and I decided if you can't beat them join them even though I did not agree with what everyone did I did anything just to be accepted. I lost weight and ended up in a big group of 30 which consisted of people who had been kicked out of other groups, beaten up and bullied like I was. I thank paster Paul for helping me at the end of year 10 if it wasn't for him I would not be here now.



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15 Oct 2012, 8:19 am

I went through this one myself, back in highschool years ago. Bloody stupid, it was.

I'd get picked on all the time, by various jerks. Never really knew why. Never CARED why. It was bloody annoying. My usual defense against this was to never say a word, and just stare at them until they shut up and went away, figuring that the stupid gasbags would eventually run out of steam, get bored, and wander off, which is usually what happened. On the very, very rare occaision that anyone was bloody stupid enough to try to get physical with me, well, it didnt go well for them. I never actually struck back at anyone or anything, but I could basically make it so they either A: made themselves look like complete idiots who couldnt deal with someone that was essentially just standing there, or B: did something or other.... totally nonviolently.... that would scare them off, or basically make it so they no longer had any control over the situation. I also knew the faculty pretty well and was on good terms with all of them, and that also helped; I'm impatient and have always believed in SOLVING problems rather than enduring them, so I would not hesitate for even a moment to take my complaints about those jerks straight to the principal or someone like that, and *I* was always the one they believed; despite that I was a pretty awful student, grades wise, I've always been an honest person, and they knew that, so that worked out well enough.


But still, having to deal with such complete idiocy all day, EVERY day, in that blasted place..... very annoying.

There were some nice people there though too; there always are, if you look hard enough. But I swear, the amount of complete asshats can really make it seem like there's just no end to the torment, when you're in school.

It's sad that this crap has to happen at all, it really is.



Issit
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15 Oct 2012, 8:30 am

It was bad.
Once one boy kicked me hard to my back when I tried to be invisible sitting and reading.
From that time on I am very nervous when someone is behind me when I am sitting and can not see him.



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15 Oct 2012, 12:29 pm

Yes, secondary school as we call it in the UK was the worst. I had people start fights on me and pick on me for no known reason. I hated school and I seemed to perpetually be living in fear. I lived for the day that I could leave. I only had one friend, and she wasn't one of the 'popular' types either so I had no back up when anyone started anything on me. Bullies are always cowards though. On each occasion, the person came up behind me, once on the stairs, once from behind with a hockey stick and once lay in wait for me in the changing rooms with a gang. Then there was the being followed home by jeering groups, threatening further things. I was quiet and kept myself to myself, I didn't involve myself with others or gossip etc. so I knew I had done nothing to deserve it. I will never understand how someone can do those things to another person.


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15 Oct 2012, 12:46 pm

Yeah and sh*tty.

Ha ha I know everyone is entitled to their opinion, but I get pissed when it seems like someone is trying to downplay it. Yeah try getting picked on by teachers and other kids every year since pretty much preschool, and half the time being told its your fault or thinking it is because no one tells you any differently either because they don't want to or out of not quite understanding the situation.

And now if I feel like someone is messing with me that pretty much triggers me to go all 'PTSD psychotic' on them, or various inanimate objects.



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15 Oct 2012, 1:10 pm

Quote:
My prevailing memory of high school is of walking around the school over and over again because I had no one to the spend breaks or lunch with. My school didn't allow students inside during breaks and stopping anywhere by myself was an invitation to bullies. Of course, even though the school was large people noticed my incessant circling


Same here. School was hell on earth. People jeering me everyday, teasing me about my odd clothes, stealing my stationery, punching, hitting me, flushing my head down the toilet. I didnt really have any friends. Therre were these nerdy boys who sometimes allowed me to play card games with them but obviously they got picked on as well so werent in much position to defend me. Got picked on by certain teachers as well.



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15 Oct 2012, 5:17 pm

Yes, I was bullied at school. I'll never forget how much harm they done me.


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15 Oct 2012, 5:21 pm

High school was actually the one place people left me alone in school. I scared the s**t out of them so much they were afraid to try anything.

The damage done in elementary/middle school is bad enough, however.


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15 Oct 2012, 5:57 pm

My bullying was mostly in elementary and middle school, and high school in 9th grade. Middle school was the worst.

It wasn't until I hit my growth spurt and became one of the tallest kids at school in 10th grade that people started leaving me alone. I am 6'4" now, but as a kid I was the short skinny kid that got picked on. I was always smaller than most kids and hit my growth spurt later than most.



rpcarnell
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15 Oct 2012, 11:47 pm

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While it is very rare for me to hold grudges for long, there is at least one person from high school who I am quite happy to never see even though we only live 20 miles away from each other.

Fortunately, he doesn't show up to the high school reunions.


Really? Well, I am in Panama, where everyone that was in my school is probably less than 20 miles away (small country, I guess), and it is a miracle I haven't run into someone I dislike, given the fact that there were like 6 or 7 people who teased me back in school. Perhaps because one of them ended up in a mental hospital, the other one died of a drug overdose, and no one knows what happened to the guy who got expelled.

What a shame that the four people I dislike the most are now high middle class and get a lot of admiration from people. Bummer. At least I don't have to see them in high school reunions because I never go to those. Not interested.


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15 Oct 2012, 11:54 pm

lonelyguy wrote:
Humans can be so bloody wicked to people who dont seam to fit into their little idea of being normal
I feel sorry for all you guys that had to endure this kind of sh** for most of your life,but i always say what goes around comes around,no wonder i have grown up with a lot of problems with people.....love animals much better than people at least you get respect. :twisted:
I agree. Reading these posts breaks my heart. But, I don't believe in Karma. I have seen far too many rotten people come out ahead.



Kindertotenlieder79
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16 Oct 2012, 12:20 am

I didn't fit in anywhere. The smart kids, the rednecks, the jocks, the artsy/alternative/nosering clique, the average kids, I had bullies from every group. I think maybe two kids didn't dislike me. I suffered from bad foot-in-mouth disorder, being unintentionally offensive, or just saying flat-out weird stuff in moments of over or under-stimulation. I was a target to a handful of psychos and a couple nasty teachers. I always had hope I would fit at some point, but I never did. By my final year I was skipping school a lot and almost didn't graduate, and this was after being on the honor roll my first two years. Any "friends" I ever made turned on me due to my weirdness. I hated going to school, and the hatred and disdain of my peers made me so angry. I can honestly say I never got past it. It doesn't help that I can't evolve socially.



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16 Oct 2012, 1:14 am

I was never really made fun of in highschool at least not to my face. I was in special education since the 2nd grade so I guess I became off limits or something. I also never really had friends till my senor year. I decided I wanted to try smoking weed after reading about it for 2 weeks. I talked to a person who I was once friends with in the first grade, we played with hot wheels cars and talked about dragon ball z at recess. we talked about weed a little bit and I asked if I could buy some. after I smoked weed a few times with him a met a bunch of people as he always had people coming and going from his apartment. I end up having something in common with people. this opened tons of doors I even got invited to a few party's that year.