Board index › General Discussion › General Autism Discussion

Why do you find the word "ret*d" offensive?

Page 2 of 8 [ 115 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4, 5 ... 8  Next

Previous topic | Next topic

r84shi37
Velociraptor
Velociraptor

User avatar

Joined: 28 Sep 2012
Age: 27
Gender: Male
Posts: 448

28 Dec 2012, 6:46 pm

eric76 wrote:
r84shi37 wrote:
Noun
offensive. A mentally handicapped person (often used as a general term of abuse).


After that, you had to ask?


Because people don't find it offensive because the dictionary says it is. The dictionary says it's offensive because people find it offensive.

Thank you all for your inputs; I see the point that people almost exclusively use it as an insult, rather than a technical term. I suppose all words can evolve into something else. Languages change all the time.


_________________
Do I have HFA? Nope, I've never seen a psychiatrist in my life. I'm just here to talk to you crazies. ; - )


Jitro
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 May 2012
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 589

28 Dec 2012, 7:12 pm

The word "lame" means unable to walk. However people started using it as an insult saying to people "you're so lame!".



PseudointellectualHorse
Pileated woodpecker
Pileated woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 1 Nov 2005
Gender: Male
Posts: 188
Location: Pasadena, California

28 Dec 2012, 8:45 pm

I heard a report of a public screening of NAPOLEON DYNAMITE that was cancelled when someone remembered the word "ret*d" was used in a scene.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BxN9Mw6iQUs[/youtube]Seems to me that anyone who claims to be offended by this sort of thing is just posturing, and our modern hypersensitivity is unnatural and unrealistic and counterproductive. We're just putting social pressure on ourselves to stifle normal human expression.

In other words, we're acting like a bunch of ret*ds.



pensieve
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 18 Nov 2008
Age: 38
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,204
Location: Sydney, Australia

28 Dec 2012, 9:07 pm

I interpret the word literally. When it is used in any way, medically, or offensively, I think of the literal meaning.

There's a new medical term for it and the only people that use it now are using it to let someone know how stupid/annoying they sound etc. The only people I hear use it are aged between 13-25.

I don't really use insulting words for people because they are not factual and I'm no longer 13. I don't purposely offend people. Anyone who uses the word ret*d/stupid/idiot/moron is immature and limited in a vocabulary and not worthy of my time.


_________________
My band photography blog - http://lostthroughthelens.wordpress.com/
My personal blog - http://helptheywantmetosocialise.wordpress.com/


Verdandi
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Dec 2010
Age: 54
Gender: Female
Posts: 12,275
Location: University of California Sunnydale (fictional location - Real location Olympia, WA)

28 Dec 2012, 9:18 pm

Noetic wrote:
I tend not to find words like that offensive. If they are used as an insult towards me, then yes I find it offensive, but I never understood this NT tendency to get hysterical about meanings they impose on words and how you "aren't supposed to say that".


That's not an NT tendency - it's a human tendency. It's not hysteria, and it is frequently valid. Your description of how this happens is way off the mark.



Verdandi
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Dec 2010
Age: 54
Gender: Female
Posts: 12,275
Location: University of California Sunnydale (fictional location - Real location Olympia, WA)

28 Dec 2012, 9:20 pm

btbnnyr wrote:
I know it's supposed to be offensive, but hearing it doesn't bother me, even if applied to me.


This is how I feel about a variety of offensive words that could be applied to me. I personally am not bothered by being called these things, but I do not think it is helpful to foster an environment where people are called these things as a matter of course.



Verdandi
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Dec 2010
Age: 54
Gender: Female
Posts: 12,275
Location: University of California Sunnydale (fictional location - Real location Olympia, WA)

28 Dec 2012, 9:23 pm

PseudointellectualHorse wrote:
]Seems to me that anyone who claims to be offended by this sort of thing is just posturing, and our modern hypersensitivity is unnatural and unrealistic and counterproductive. We're just putting social pressure on ourselves to stifle normal human expression.


So verbal abuse is normal human expression? Then I am grateful that I do not qualify for your definition of "normal human."

And why do you think that it is just posturing and not genuine? That's a really bizarre motive to attribute to people, the assumption that everyone who expresses a certain opinion is just being dishonest.



daydreamer84
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 8 Jul 2009
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 5,001
Location: My own little world

28 Dec 2012, 9:25 pm

r84shi37 wrote:
Thank you all for your inputs; I see the point that people almost exclusively use it as an insult, rather than a technical term. I suppose all words can evolve into something else. Languages change all the time.


Exactly ...........the terms idiot and moron used to be technical terms for individuals with intellectual disabilities but they aren't any more...now they're insults. ret*d started out as a technical term but has become an insult and now has pejorative connotations so it has become offensive. The relationship between the series of sounds that form a word and that word's meaning is arbitrary. There is nothing inherently offensive about ANY word......it's just the way words are used in a society and the meaning they're given can be offensive. So yes, at this point in time in the English language the word ret*d, used to describe an individual, is offensive.



IChris
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 15 Dec 2012
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 138
Location: Norway

28 Dec 2012, 9:27 pm

Verdandi wrote:
Noetic wrote:
I tend not to find words like that offensive. If they are used as an insult towards me, then yes I find it offensive, but I never understood this NT tendency to get hysterical about meanings they impose on words and how you "aren't supposed to say that".


That's not an NT tendency - it's a human tendency. It's not hysteria, and it is frequently valid. Your description of how this happens is way off the mark.


I do not find it so easy; the way a human use words may be hard to generalize without a bongo-bongoism. To inquire into the use of words may reveal much more than pragmatic features, and it may even reveal a NT tendency rather than a human tendency. I can not say, but I find the tendencies interesting and I do not believe that my future research would agree upon a generalization of this.



Magnus_Rex
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Oct 2010
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,704
Location: Home

28 Dec 2012, 9:30 pm

In addition to offenses, compliments also do not work with me if they are merely words. For example, many people I know have told me at some point that I am intelligent/smart/a genius. I usually disregard it. However, when somebody asks me a difficult question or asks me to solve a problem, I feel very satisfied, because it shows that they really think I am capable of doing it.

The veredict is: actions > words.


_________________
DISCLAIMER: It should be noted that, while I strongly suspect I have Asperger's syndrome, I am not diagnosed. Nevertheless, my score on RAADS-R is 186, which makes me a pretty RAAD guy.

Sorry for this terrible joke, by the way.


vermontsavant
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 7 Dec 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 6,110
Location: Left WP forever

28 Dec 2012, 9:40 pm

r84shi37 wrote:
ret*d definition:

Verb
Delay or hold back in terms of progress, development, or accomplishment.

Noun
offensive. A mentally handicapped person (often used as a general term of abuse).

ret*d definition:

Adjective
Less advanced, esp. mentally, than is usual for one's age.

Synonyms
backward - delayed

I don't find "ret*d or ret*d" offensive. I used to verbally use them; ever since I joined WP I learned that many aspergians (and probably anyone with a mental condition) hate it, so I have avoided using them. Now, looking at it from a technical standpoint, most aspergians are held back or delayed in some form or another i.e socially, motor issues, etc. I don't consider us handicapped, but some people do, and I guess from a very particular perspective we could be considered handicapped. Aspergians are generally socially less advanced than their peers, however, I think we tend to be intellectually more advanced. Aspergians are probably delayed in certain ways as well.

It's really just a word, and the meaning of the word more or less can apply to aspergians. Of course, there are plenty of types of mental conditions, I'm just using AS as my example because I'm fairly sure that most WP users are aspergians. I understand that in certain context it can be offensive, but generally. it's just a word; like "obese" or "weird".
if we go back to the original latin it simply means slowed down


_________________
Forever gone
Sorry I ever joined


deltafunction
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jun 2012
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,094
Location: Lost

28 Dec 2012, 9:41 pm

The OP's question reminds me of Ann Coulter trying to defend her use of the word on the Piers Morgan show.

It's just inappropriate and offensive and you can use other words to insult someone without offending the whole population with mental illnesses. She looked pretty ignorant herself when she refused to acknowledge that it is deeply offensive while still acknowledging that other words, such as the n-word are off-limits. It's a good video to watch if you want to have a few laughs.

I tend not to get offended when people use regular words as insults. What offends me is how the use of that word is like a strike below the belt. It's cheap and offensive. To me, it's the equivalent of fighting dirty.



noxnocturne
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 5 Nov 2012
Age: 45
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,693
Location: Harassing Muggles

28 Dec 2012, 10:31 pm

To be honest, I don't find it all that offensive.



Jitro
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 May 2012
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 589

28 Dec 2012, 10:33 pm

What about "lame"? Do you find it offensive when someone uses that as an insult? The word means unable to walk.



auntblabby
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 113,737
Location: the island of defective toy santas

29 Dec 2012, 12:33 am

Aspiegaming wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
anybody who would call another person a ret*d might as well be describing themselves.


I learned something about that in high school psychology. I paraphrased it this way. People who call others that which they are necessarily not are often that themselves.

in shakespeare's play "hamlet," there is a line about "the lady doth protest too much, methinks" which is the flipside of people who disrespect others with the R word, that they are covering up a flaw in themselves with noise and fury.



Verdandi
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Dec 2010
Age: 54
Gender: Female
Posts: 12,275
Location: University of California Sunnydale (fictional location - Real location Olympia, WA)

29 Dec 2012, 12:47 am

IChris wrote:
I do not find it so easy; the way a human use words may be hard to generalize without a bongo-bongoism. To inquire into the use of words may reveal much more than pragmatic features, and it may even reveal a NT tendency rather than a human tendency. I can not say, but I find the tendencies interesting and I do not believe that my future research would agree upon a generalization of this.


It's not an NT tendency. I have observed many autistic people online doing this. I know there's a tendency here to characterize things individuals do not do as NT, but it is not always the case that it is an "NT" thing vs. an "autistic." Most of these offensive words that apply to me do not actually prompt an emotional reaction, beyond the sense that using them as insults is inappropriate. On this forum, such insults are actually a violation of the forum rules. The ability to care about these things is not strictly an NT thing - if anything, it seems to me many NTs say exactly the same things that many autistic people posted in this thread in order to justify their use of such insults.

I will also go ahead and say that just because something actually is the sort of thing an NT is more likely to come up with, this does not make it bad or wrong or to be avoided. Often, they're not bad ideas at all. Sometimes they are, but the same is true of us.