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jellybean590
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05 Feb 2013, 9:39 pm

I'm 18 and I've known for awhile now that my mom is't "normal". I looked into Asperger's as a possible diagnosis for myself, then realized it fit my mom even better. I know its long but please give me you're opinions does she sound like an Aspie?

- She has no friends and has always been painfully shy. When raising me and my brothers she literally saw no one except for us.
- She's overly sensitive and super paranoid. She always thinks people are plotting against her or talking behind her back or judging her.
- She's always been beautiful and model skinny and she NEVER stops talking about it. In fact I partly blame her for my eating disorder. Starting in kindergarden she would tell me how beautiful and skinny I was going to be when I was older just like her. She said I didn't need good grades or an education because being skinny and gorgeous was enough to get a man who could. When we'd go out, she'd always say things like "oh that mom doesn't like me because I'm so skinny, and she's fat" or "Oh that girl was mean to you today? She was probably jealous because you're so pretty an she's chubby and all the boys like you!"
- She's never had a real job in her life. She can't do simple things like use the internet or the phone and refuses to learn how yet she insists she still capable of getting a job when she needs it.
- Me and my family pretty much live in a dump because she can't clean up after herself. She also wears the same outfit every day.
- She has a very strange sense of speaking and weird mannerisms that I can't really explain
- She's OBSESSED with Irish Culture, Genealogy, Antiques, and her hometown. (I swear I know more about it than MY hometown) She forces my little sister to be in Irish pageants and compete in Irish dance
- She comes off as being sensitive and selfless almost like this childlike innocent little girl. She over emphasizes her motherly role and clings on to us and tells us shes the good parent and my dads the bad guy (he kind of is but he isn't. Hes has narcissistic personally disorder and I'll save him for another post).
- My brother was diagnosed with autism but with therapy he's 16 and he's pretty much "grown" out of it.
- She's stupid. Like not in a mean way, shes incredibly slow when it comes to learning things or talking to people. She doesn't realize how weird she is or that the things she's talking about are boring or bizarre or insensitive and people avoid her because of it

Anyway thats not even beginning to explain her personality. What do you guys think?



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05 Feb 2013, 9:44 pm

To me that doesn't sound like autism. I can't even explain why, but I just don't "feel" it. But of course that's only an unprofessional opinion.


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emimeni
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05 Feb 2013, 9:51 pm

Sorry. Unless your mom comes on here and says "I think I have autism", I'm not going to believe it.


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cathylynn
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05 Feb 2013, 10:41 pm

the few friends and special interests sound like they could be autism.



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05 Feb 2013, 11:34 pm

Yeah, socially naive, special interests, awkward, everything flying right over her head... It's really a possibility.

Is she okay where she is right now, or is she having problems related to these traits? If there are problems, you probably owe it to her to have a talk with her about them, see if maybe she could find some help somewhere. You can't diagnose her of course, but you can talk to her about the concrete problems she is facing and the possibility that there might be a solution. She may have something that isn't Asperger's, but what you're describing seems to be enough to make you wonder whether she might have some sort of condition that could be identified to help her compensate for those weaknesses.

Be prepared for the possibility that she'll reject your suggestion out of hand. Many people think of disability as "something that happens to something else and usually involves wheelchairs and white canes". Don't try to push it; it'll probably take some time for her to get used to the idea that she might be different enough to give a diagnosis to. Just expose her to the idea and let her make her own decisions about it. After all, it's her life. And for all you know, she might go to the doctor only to be reassured that she's simply eccentric, nothing to worry about. Maybe she is. It all depends on the degree of those traits, how much they get in the way--whether they're impairments or just personality quirks.


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06 Feb 2013, 12:30 am

Maybe or just has traits. She also sounded like she has some narcissistic personality in her regarding how she is about her looks. I also sense social anxiety because she always thinks people are talking behind her back or judging her.


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ScottC
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06 Feb 2013, 1:34 am

She sounds she might have the "shy gorilla" type of autism. Shyness and paranoia don't normally go together except in very intelligent people who calculate things too much. Wearing the same clothes everyday and following the same pattern....lack of picking up the mood or interest of others..etc.. My tendancies are this way..and I also see very strongly in my mother as well. my father also has the narcissistic personality...he watches quietly while my mother talks stream-of-concious randomly...while he's smirking and drumming his fingers. maybe a lot of family members just give up having 2-way conversations with people on the spectrum.

Shy gorilla article:
http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt77055.html



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06 Feb 2013, 12:26 pm

But I think "chubby" girls are pretty ----- :(

I really don't belong in this world.


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