What is you general attitude towards humans?

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Is your attitude towards humans (other people as well as yourself) in general/overall more positive or negative?
My attitude towards humans (other people as well as yourself) is in general/overall more positive than negative. 43%  43%  [ 32 ]
My attitude towards humans (other people as well as yourself) is in general/overall more negative than positive. 57%  57%  [ 42 ]
Total votes : 74

hyperlexian
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12 Mar 2013, 8:35 am

qawer wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
i understand that you might not be capable of being altruistic in that way, but that doesn't mean that everybody else is the same way. we are all different.


Actually I am. Probably because of my autistic side. It has back-fired on me a lot. I have helped people a lot and received nothing in return. Acting truly altruistic is a sign of mental illness. I have a hard time accepting it.

it's not a sign of mental illness, it's the central feature of certain religions and philosophies. it would not "backfire" if you did not expect anything in return, so you failed at being altruistic.

i would flip this around and instead assert that people who see social interactions and relationships as a series of transactions, where they are expecting to get something in return for their efforts (even internally), will be highly unlikely to be happy. i don't see how they have a very good chance of being happy if they are always expecting to have reinforcement for their actions or if they are ultimately self-serving. i think they could alienate other people with their selfishness and could become jaded and unpleasant. they might think that everyone else is out to get something, or that everyone else is self-centred too.

i think it is possible to understand that people are sometimes imperfect, yet to accept them as they are. i think it is possible to see that flaws exist in other people, yet to be happy nonetheless. i think that also by being the best person that i can be, and by noticing some of the very best characteristics in others, i can hope that other people will be just as good.


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qawer
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12 Mar 2013, 9:00 am

hyperlexian wrote:
it would not "backfire" if you did not expect anything in return, so you failed at being altruistic.


But actually I did not expect anything in return. But the more time you spend on serving the interests of others, the less time you have to serve your own interests. The less time you spend on serving your own interests the less happy you'll be. Acting truly altruistic makes you more unhappy.

But the thing is: people who are fine with acting 'altruistic' usually have a self-interest involved in the action, so it really is not truly altruistic. Helping others may very well be a self-interest.



hyperlexian
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12 Mar 2013, 9:10 am

qawer wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:
it would not "backfire" if you did not expect anything in return, so you failed at being altruistic.


But actually I did not expect anything in return. But the more time you spend on serving the interests of others, the less time you have to serve your own interests. The less time you spend on serving your own interests the less happy you'll be. Acting truly altruistic makes you more unhappy.

But the thing is: people who are fine with acting 'altruistic' usually have a self-interest involved in the action, so it really is not truly altruistic. Helping others may very well be a self-interest.

you did expect something in return because you said being altruistic "back-fired on me a lot. I have helped people a lot and received nothing in return". that means that you expected to get rewarded (either externally or internally) and you didn't.

and i already explained that not everyone has a self-interest involved. different strokes for different folks. once again, simply because your brain works one way doesn't mean that everyone else's does.

i answered the other issue as well, which you did not address. i disagree that altruism makes a person unhappy, i believe it is acting in self-interest that is more likely to lead that way:

hyperlexian wrote:
i would flip this around and instead assert that people who see social interactions and relationships as a series of transactions, where they are expecting to get something in return for their efforts (even internally), will be highly unlikely to be happy. i don't see how they have a very good chance of being happy if they are always expecting to have reinforcement for their actions or if they are ultimately self-serving. i think they could alienate other people with their selfishness and could become jaded and unpleasant. they might think that everyone else is out to get something, or that everyone else is self-centred too.

i think it is possible to understand that people are sometimes imperfect, yet to accept them as they are. i think it is possible to see that flaws exist in other people, yet to be happy nonetheless. i think that also by being the best person that i can be, and by noticing some of the very best characteristics in others, i can hope that other people will be just as good.


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qawer
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12 Mar 2013, 9:20 am

hyperlexian wrote:

i would flip this around and instead assert that people who see social interactions and relationships as a series of transactions, where they are expecting to get something in return for their efforts (even internally), will be highly unlikely to be happy. i don't see how they have a very good chance of being happy if they are always expecting to have reinforcement for their actions or if they are ultimately self-serving. i think they could alienate other people with their selfishness and could become jaded and unpleasant. they might think that everyone else is out to get something, or that everyone else is self-centred too.


I see your point. But social interactions and relationships really are nothing but a series of transactions. If you for some reason don't like to have someone as your friend anymore, you simply stop having contact. The relationship is no longer beneficial to you. Life is not romantic (unfortunately!).

Happiness is simply a matter of having one's needs fulfilled. If you can accept that social interactions and relationships are nothing but a series of transactions, you can be happy in spite of this.



hyperlexian
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12 Mar 2013, 9:26 am

qawer wrote:
hyperlexian wrote:

i would flip this around and instead assert that people who see social interactions and relationships as a series of transactions, where they are expecting to get something in return for their efforts (even internally), will be highly unlikely to be happy. i don't see how they have a very good chance of being happy if they are always expecting to have reinforcement for their actions or if they are ultimately self-serving. i think they could alienate other people with their selfishness and could become jaded and unpleasant. they might think that everyone else is out to get something, or that everyone else is self-centred too.


I see your point. But social interactions and relationships really are nothing but a series of transactions. If you for some reason don't like to have someone as your friend anymore, you simply stop having contact. The relationship is no longer beneficial to you. Life is not romantic (unfortunately!).

Happiness is simply a matter of having one's needs fulfilled. If you can accept that social interactions and relationships are nothing but a series of transactions, you can be happy in spite of this.

ahhhh i see. but what you are saying is not factual - it is only your opinions. some people believe that all relationships are transactions, but others do not think that. there isn't any right or wrong answer, contrary to your assertions. the way i approach relationships makes me happy, so i tend to think that it has some merit on that basis.


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qawer
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12 Mar 2013, 9:45 am

hyperlexian wrote:
ahhhh i see. but what you are saying is not factual - it is only your opinions. some people believe that all relationships are transactions, but others do not think that. there isn't any right or wrong answer, contrary to your assertions. the way i approach relationships makes me happy, so i tend to think that it has some merit on that basis.


I'd like to still see it the way you do - and believe in it. I just don't anymore. I used to see it that way when I was younger, but there has been too much evidence that they really only are transactions.



Last edited by qawer on 12 Mar 2013, 9:48 am, edited 1 time in total.

Fnord
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12 Mar 2013, 9:47 am

(X) Other: Largely indifferent, until provoked into response.


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12 Mar 2013, 10:25 am

Meh I'm sure a dog would hate a cow if they were forced to cohabitate.

My complaint is the excessive amount of posturing that leads nt's into believe there some magical creature with a soul.

When your an aspie your somewhat forced to be aware of those things in which you perform poorly.

For many nt's there not exposed to this line of thinking enough to truly realize there just monkeys like the rest of us.



LeeAnderson
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13 Mar 2013, 5:10 am

Overwhelmingly negative but mostly pitying.



CockneyRebel
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13 Mar 2013, 7:21 am

People are a bunch of gender police who act as though I chose to be female. I identify as male on WP and other websites because that's how I feel on the inside and I go by the nickname Mick Avory, because thank God grew up to look like him in the end instead of an average woman and I'm of the same highly sensitive nature that he is. I can easily hide my true gender by wearing pea coats and I already have a deep voice. God realized he made a mistake and so he found a way to fix it, hence my facial features.


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XFilesGeek
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13 Mar 2013, 10:57 am

I think humans are imperfect creatures, with imperfect knowledge, living in imperfect situations, in an indifferent universe.

Mostly, their monkey antics make me laugh.

My view is more positive than negative because I just can't take life, or the humans I encounter, seriously enough to hold a grudge. We're all fellow travelers to the grave, and most people I've met are just trying to do the best they can dealing with the cosmic joke that is self-awareness.

Besides, they invented coffee. 8)


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13 Mar 2013, 9:09 pm

This ought define my attitude towards humans overall :D



[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VAGNRNVaGBA[/youtube]


"Drones since the dawn of time
Compelled to live your sheltered lives
Not once has anyone ever seen
Such a rise of pure hypocrisy
I'll instigate I'll free your mind
I'll show you what I've known all this time

God Hates Us All, God Hates Us All
You know it's true God hates this place
You know it's true he hates this race

Homicide-Suicide
Hate heals, you should try it sometime
Strive for Peace with acts of war
The beauty of death we all adore
I have no faith distracting me
I know why your prayers will never be answered

God Hates Us All; God Hates Us All
He F**king' hates me

Pessimist, Terrorist targeting the next mark
Global chaos feeding on hysteria
Cut throat, slit your wrist, shoot you in the back fair game
Drug abuse, self abuse searching for the next high
Sounds a lot like hell is spreading all the time
I'm waiting for the day the whole world f**king dies

I never said I wanted to be God's disciple
I'll never be the one to blindly follow

Man made virus infecting the world
Self-destruct human time bomb
What if there is no God would you think the f**king same
Wasting your life in a leap of blind faith
Wake the f**k up can't ignore what I say
I got my own philosophy

I hate everyone equally
You can't tear that out of me
No segregation -separation
Just me in my world of enemies

I never said I wanted to be God's disciple
I'll never be the one to blindly follow
I'll never be the one to bear the cross-disciple

I reject this f**kin' race
I despise this f**kin' place


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