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Another_Alien
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05 Sep 2010, 7:53 am

I know this is controversial, but I don't think most people on WP have 'typical' Aspergers; just a mild version of it. For most people on WP, Aspergers is more of a quirky personality thing, rather than something profoundly disabling. The most disabled Aspies are too disabled (or too disconnected from reality) to fully understand the concept of their condition, and therefore come on WP to talk about it. Besides, anyone who's glad they have Aspergers (as many people on WP are) can't have too many serious Aspergers related issues (unless they're masochists). I also base all this on my own observations: I have personally made the journey from severe Aspergers to mild (practically non-existent) Aspergers, and I'm certain the vast majority of people on WP aren't as severly affected as I was.

Mild/Moderate/Severe Aspergers, as I see it:

Mild

You have some quirks/eccentricities, but you've basically got your **** together, and have most of the following:

- A reasonably good job, or you're on course for a reasonably good job, e.g. university
- Friends, and significant sexual experiences
- A car
- Your own place

Moderate ('typical' Aspergers)

You don't have most of the things listed above, but at least you understand the importance of having these things, and you're trying (albeit awkwardly) to work towards them. Or you want these things, but they're very difficult for you to obtain, and you've lost your motivation, and you may be depressed/anxious.

Severe (heading towards classic Autism)

Not only do you not have the things listed above, but you don't even understand why they're important. You're disconnected from reality (at least partially), and living in a fantasy world to some degree; completely unable to become a fully functioning adult.

To be blunt, I don't think anyone on WP falls into this category. If you were this bad you wouldn't have sufficient awareness of your predicament to be able to analyze it. I know this, as I was this bad myself!

And, yes, I understand these categories are loose, and there will always be atypical cases.

Please feel free to challenge my arguments here. And I'd love some answers to the following:

1 - Which category do you think you're in and why?
2 - If you're only 'Mild', and you've got your **** together, why are you on WP? I don't mean this nastily; just curious.
3 - Has anybody moved categories during their lifetime, e.g. Moderate to Mild, or Severe to Moderate. In particular, has anyone improved from Severe to Mild?

Thanks



MONKEY
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05 Sep 2010, 8:15 am

The "criterias" you have thought up to determine someone's severity are very inaccurate. I don't have a job, a car, my own place or any sexual experience past kissing (I do however have friends), but my AS is still considered to be on the very mild end. And I don't see myself as having my "s**t" together either, infact I'm all over the place.
Also, having severe aspergers doesn't stop one from posting on an internet forum so of course they will be psting here, they're still literate and have normal-above average intelligence. There are people with severe classic autism that post here, one (she hasn't posted for ages) is actually mildly ret*d but she's still capable of making contributions to threads, and does know what she goes through and explains her meltdowns and other symptoms, despite being LFA and probably very cutoff in real life if not on the internet.

Well, since you want to know why mild aspies are here. I will tell you why I'm on here, I am mildly affected but I joined this site because at the time I was very interested in the subject of ASDs and I also wanted to meet more people on the same boat as me. Now I post because I enjoy it here and I find this site addictive.
Answering the last question, I have fluctuated over the years, I have remained mild enough but I was definitely more severe at primary school age, though I changed quite a lot when I was about 12/13.


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Another_Alien
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05 Sep 2010, 8:38 am

Monkey - I hear what you're saying, but you're only 17, so I wouldn't necessarily expect you to have your **** together at your age, even if you were NT. I should have said 'assuming you've reached an age where you're expected to have those things'.

In fairness, I may be wrong about Severe Aspies not having sufficient awareness of their condition to be able to discuss it. I can only tell you that when I was your age I was virtually disconnected from reality (so a million times worse than you), BUT I didn't know I had AS (it didn't officially exist then), and the internet hadn't been invented. IF I'd been diagnosed AND had access to the internet would I have been able to participate meaningfully on WP? Hmmm, I'm really not sure. I was pretty bad.

Thanks for your response anyway.



yukari
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05 Sep 2010, 8:57 am

Another_Alien, I fully don't like your criteria, because they are from outer point of view, from material world, from society.
I study in the university. Languages is my obesession :wink: In the future I will be teacher, or writer, or both.
I earn enough money to live, but I am not rich.
I don't have a car, and don't plan to have. I really don't need it. I don't understand, why many people see car as symbol of success. I prefer other kinds of transport, especially tram or subway. But, if something will change (but I cannot imagine what should happen) maybe I will change this opinion.
I don't have my own place but want to have as soon as possible.
I have many friends and about three or four close friends. I didn't have sexual experience yet, although sometimes I was in love. I don't understand, why this things is so important by many people. There are some people, which are very close from spiritual point of view, and it's more important for me, than real sexual contact.

So I will let you decide, is it mild or not or what else. I can only add, that as I was child, I had more severe aspergers symptoms, and I still have some problems, like facial blindness or trouble understanding body language. I wonder you not mentioned such things in your criteria.

This site is for me a place, where I can discuss my psychological problems not having fear to be considered deceased. Like Monkey, I was very glad to find people, who are in same boat with me, and I like to read about their experience, this gives me new ideas and helps to solve own problems. To meet people like me is source of inspiration.



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05 Sep 2010, 9:38 am

Another_Alien wrote:
I know this is controversial, but I don't think most people on WP have 'typical' Aspergers; just a mild version of it. For most people on WP, Aspergers is more of a quirky personality thing, rather than something profoundly disabling. The most disabled Aspies are too disabled (or too disconnected from reality) to fully understand the concept of their condition, and therefore come on WP to talk about it. Besides, anyone who's glad they have Aspergers (as many people on WP are) can't have too many serious Aspergers related issues (unless they're masochists). I also base all this on my own observations: I have personally made the journey from severe Aspergers to mild (practically non-existent) Aspergers, and I'm certain the vast majority of people on WP aren't as severly affected as I was.

Mild/Moderate/Severe Aspergers, as I see it:

Mild

You have some quirks/eccentricities, but you've basically got your **** together, and have most of the following:

- A reasonably good job, or you're on course for a reasonably good job, e.g. university


Actually, I work as a janitor and can't really get a education due to my learning difficulties. I can maybe still go but I don't know if I make it through college. I know it be a struggle again.

Quote:
- Friends, and significant sexual experiences


I have a husband and not many friends. Just support groups and one other group I hardly go to now.

Quote:
- A car


My parents got me one when I finished high school and I still have it. No car payments.
Quote:
- Your own place


I rent.

Quote:
Moderate ('typical' Aspergers)

You don't have most of the things listed above, but at least you understand the importance of having these things, and you're trying (albeit awkwardly) to work towards them. Or you want these things, but they're very difficult for you to obtain, and you've lost your motivation, and you may be depressed/anxious.


Here here.

Quote:
Severe (heading towards classic Autism)

Not only do you not have the things listed above, but you don't even understand why they're important. You're disconnected from reality (at least partially), and living in a fantasy world to some degree; completely unable to become a fully functioning adult.


I prefer to be alone, does that count? But the rest doesn't apply to me.

Quote:
To be blunt, I don't think anyone on WP falls into this category. If you were this bad you wouldn't have sufficient awareness of your predicament to be able to analyze it. I know this, as I was this bad myself!


I think that is a pretty ignorant statement. I wasn't aware of my differences as a child because I didn't know what I was missing. I knew I was different but didn't know why. Undiagnosed aspies know they are different but don't understand why and they may believe they can be normal if they try harder. They might not know they are missing out on stuff other people can do. Then when they read about AS finally, they are like "Holy s**t, I didn't know people can do that."

Quote:
Please feel free to challenge my arguments here. And I'd love some answers to the following:

1- Which category do you think you're in and why?


Because I was told so and I don't relate to other aspies and I don't have their difficulties. I am not extreme as they are. I'm no textbook.

I don't always like functioning labels because you can have some parts that are severe such as sensory issues or anxiety it effects how you function in life so it may seem like your AS is worse than it really is. Plus they can be misleading and people assume what you should be able to do or assume you can't do.

Quote:
2 - If you're only 'Mild', and you've got your **** together, why are you on WP? I don't mean this nastily; just curious.


Autism/AS is my obsession and this place is the most active aspie forum there is.

Quote:
3 - Has anybody moved categories during their lifetime, e.g. Moderate to Mild, or Severe to Moderate. In particular, has anyone improved from Severe to Mild?


I was worse as a kid but I think I have always been mild. I was even labeled as being autistic when I was two or three.


But hey interesting thread. :D



pgd
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05 Sep 2010, 9:46 am

Do feel that terms like mild, moderate, and severe are (somewhat) helpful along the lines that tall people may like to play basketball, medium people too, but midgets may not share their enthusiasm for the sport of basketball.

At the same time, the whole area of Asperger - Autism, is not that clear to me since Temple Grandlin is presented as a good example of autism (not Asperger).

So would Temple Grandin classify herself as mild autism, moderate autism, or severe autism?

http://www.hbo.com/movies/temple-grandin/index.html

Regarding those with Asperger who do post to WP, my feeling is that their visual skills and motor skills are adequate enough to allow them to do so. Persons who completely lack visual skills and motor skills simply will not visit WP it seems to me.



WillMcC
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05 Sep 2010, 10:01 am

There is no single definition of an ASD. There are many factors and everyone has different traits.

I have a limited social life (relationships are almost non-existent) and have great difficulty identifying faces/remembering names, and I someday want to get a girlfriend and/or a Ph.D (although the latter seems more realistically feasible for me and I'm not in any rush for the former), but I do have my own place, a car, and a reasonable job (I was in retail for a long time)

For a long time, I got by without a car, and for short trips a bicycle is more than adequate and in some case preferable, especially in areas like this where public transport is limited and in some cases overcrowded. Plus there are very likely to be NT's out there who could fall into your "moderate" category.



pgd
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05 Sep 2010, 10:09 am

League_Girl wrote (in part): ...I wasn't aware of my differences as a child because I didn't know what I was missing. I knew I was different but didn't know why. Undiagnosed aspies know they are different but don't understand why and they may believe they can be normal if they try harder. They might not know they are missing out on stuff other people can do. Then when they read about AS finally, they are like "holy sh**, I didn't know people can do that."
---
League Girl - Agree 100%. Many, many, many years ago I had resolved in my mind that I would learn to play a musical instrument well enough to perform. I thought at that time that music was simply an area which could be learned given enough practice. I even wrote a letter to a famous musician in the USA which asked him how he was able to memorize and perform songs so easily. (I never received a reply back from that letter which today I understand why). Years later I became aware I had a subtle hearing difficulty/glitch known as central auditory processing disorder (CAPD) - that was my shocking moment of insight - and explained why music and myself could never be a perfect match. Personally I am aware of others who had their moments of insight such as chemistry students in high school and college who became aware they had large difficulties in seeing titration points due to undiagnosed color blindness (their moments of shocking insight).



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05 Sep 2010, 10:22 am

Actually, I find this pretty insulting. I have a job and a car and my own place, but I'm fricking miserable because my personal life sucks, has sucked and probably WILL always suck because I cannot "read people" or communicate emotionally to save my life. The external appearance of moderate success is NOT all there is to life, happiness, or even sanity.

Argh...

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05 Sep 2010, 10:22 am

No sorry this criteria doesnt quite cut the mustard.

The one important fact to remember about people with an autistic spectrum condition is that their true potential can be hidden by other difficulties some of which may have no barring or relation to an ASD diagnosis. A person with ASD has many differing factors that will contribute to their development into adulthood. These circumstances are vast and can vary considerably. Autism may have a spectrum, but there is no barrier which prevents people going up or down the spectrum if you wish to measure the spectrum in terms of "functionality" and by function you mean the ability of that person to operate and paritipate in their society and community.

There is this continous confusion between were autism begins and were a learning disability begins. Autism as of itself is not a learning disability, however you can express traits of what would be dubbed in a crude manor "low functioning" autism, such as appearing unable to verbally communicate which will give the impression of lower intelligence when the act of being mute is voluntary and varies in differing periods of a persons life. It has been continously established in research going back to the 1980's that IQ tests are a poor way of assessing the actual intelligence of a person with an autistic spectrum disorder. Although you can have patterns of differing outcomes when you narrow it down to Non-verbal or verbal IQ in individuals.

Labels are fatalistic and deterministic they do not take into account what a persons potential is to improve from their current circumstances. Given the right support, encouragement and knowledge to understand and overcome issues relating to theory of mind in autism there is no reason why a person with an ASD cannot achieve some kind of reasonable success in adulthood. However, when a learning disability is thrown into the mix you then have the same issues that comes with that kind of label.



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05 Sep 2010, 10:24 am

Meow101 wrote:
Actually, I find this pretty insulting. I have a job and a car and my own place, but I'm fricking miserable because my personal life sucks, has sucked and probably WILL always suck because I cannot "read people" or communicate emotionally to save my life. The external appearance of moderate success is NOT all there is to life, happiness, or even sanity.

Argh...

~Kate


I can think of many such people in similair situations to you who I have met over the years in various asperger communites I have been part of who are in exactly the same situation and come to such groups seeking to meet like minded people because their attempts to find friendship and significant others in mainstream socialisation has not met with success.



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05 Sep 2010, 11:10 am

I don't agree with your severe category. All someone has to do is tell you you have Asperger's and read about it, then you become aware that eye contact and such exist. The internet really helps being aware of things, too.

But I agree with your stance on mild and that most here seem to be mild. You don't have enough of a difference between moderate and severe once you take away the awareness aspect to say if they're right or wrong.



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05 Sep 2010, 11:18 am

Sounds like you've read the DSM-V

Mild/Moderate/Severe Aspergers, as I see it:

[b]Mild[/b]

You have some quirks/eccentricities, but you've basically got your **** together, and have most of the following:

- A reasonably good job, or you're on course for a reasonably good job, e.g. university
- Friends, and significant sexual experiences
- A car
- Your own place

1) I have a job but I'm not that good a communicating and it would sometimes get into conflict with my boss. I work very well at being alone and I don't like to be approached by a costumer because they will ask where is the item they are looking for and I can't answer it because I won't know where most of it is either.

2) I have friends and some of them are affected by Autism/Aspergers. I don't have sexual experience yet. Like Monkey I'm 17 and have a long way to get there. I have dated though.

3) I have a permit but I don't have a drivers license yet.

4) Like I said, I'm not there yet.

[b]Moderate ('typical' Aspergers)[/b]

You don't have most of the things listed above, but at least you understand the importance of having these things, and you're trying (albeit awkwardly) to work towards them. Or you want these things, but they're very difficult for you to obtain, and you've lost your motivation, and you may be depressed/anxious.

I get depressed and anxious. Anxiety is the biggest problem I have most of the time.

[b]Severe (heading towards classic Autism)[/b]

Not only do you not have the things listed above, but you don't even understand why they're important. You're disconnected from reality (at least partially), and living in a fantasy world to some degree; completely unable to become a fully functioning adult.

To be blunt, I don't think [i]anyone[/i] on WP falls into this category. If you were [i]this[/i] bad you wouldn't have sufficient awareness of your predicament to be able to analyze it. I know this, as I was [i]this[/i] bad myself!

And, yes, I understand these categories are loose, and there will always be atypical cases.

Please feel free to challenge my arguments here. And I'd love some answers to the following:

1 - Which category do you think you're in and why?
2 - If you're only 'Mild', and you've got your **** together, why are you on WP? I don't mean this nastily; just curious.
3 - Has anybody moved categories during their lifetime, e.g. Moderate to Mild, or Severe to Moderate. In particular, has anyone improved from Severe to Mild?

Thanks[/quote]

1) By category I would say between Mild/Monderate Autism but that dosen't mean that I will have less problems with Aspergers growing up in the real world.

2) Like the others on this thread, I want to hear from others who had similar experience like me. I even ask for help on this threads on how to get a girlfriend, anxiety, school, etc.

3) My Autism was a bit rough during my childhood. I threw tantrums, I was isolated, and I was chased around at the playground. But I never heard of Autism or Aspergers so I was unaware about my condition. It wasn't until my teenage years that I learned about my condition and had an explanation on why I was a bit different at times.

I'll end here: It dosen't matter if I have Mild/Moderate/Severe Autism, I was diagnosed Autistic by professionals and parents which means that it will be a life long condition. So I'm still considered autistic no matter the level of severity.


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05 Sep 2010, 12:27 pm

I think you need to study more on classic autism (or just ask the auties hanging around here), because most classic autistics fall into your "mild" and "moderate" categories, and many Aspies are in your "severe" category. The difference between classic autism and Asperger's autism isn't severity; it's number of symptoms. While on average Aspies are more independent than classic autistics, the groups overlap completely over the "Asperger's" range (which, as I've said, goes from needing no outside help to needing 24/7 assistance). The biggest reason they're different is that they've artificially excluded developmentally delayed people from Asperger's--it's an artifact of how the diagnosis is written.

I do not want a car, friends, or sexual experiences, for example, and I don't think that NT values should apply to me when it comes to wanting those things. I'm on my own and thinking my own thoughts about 99% of my time. What I want is to support myself and contribute to the scientific knowledge base of the world, not to be a social butterfly with an expensive car and fifteen boyfriends. Am I "severe"? What, exactly, is that supposed to mean? I'm a good deal happier than many people who do want those things. I'm well on the way to finding my own little autistic-shaped niche in the world. And I'm pretty sure functioning levels are worse than useless when it comes to categorizing us.

Edit: I'm sorry if that sounded harsh. I am being a bit blunt here, I think. Please don't assume I'm attacking anything other than an idea; I don't make a practice of attacking people.


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05 Sep 2010, 12:45 pm

Even though I'm not technically old enough to own a car, get a house, or find a job yet, I think mine would fall under mild. People don't really know I have Asperger's, so they pretty much see me as that quiet nerd who always "spoils their fun". (By they, I mean the kids in my school with barely any moral code whatsoever.)



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05 Sep 2010, 1:10 pm

Callista wrote:
I think you need to study more on classic autism (or just ask the auties hanging around here), because most classic autistics fall into your "mild" and "moderate" categories, and many Aspies are in your "severe" category. The difference between classic autism and Asperger's autism isn't severity; it's number of symptoms. While on average Aspies are more independent than classic autistics, the groups overlap completely over the "Asperger's" range (which, as I've said, goes from needing no outside help to needing 24/7 assistance). The biggest reason they're different is that they've artificially excluded developmentally delayed people from Asperger's--it's an artifact of how the diagnosis is written.

I do not want a car, friends, or sexual experiences, for example, and I don't think that NT values should apply to me when it comes to wanting those things. I'm on my own and thinking my own thoughts about 99% of my time. What I want is to support myself and contribute to the scientific knowledge base of the world, not to be a social butterfly with an expensive car and fifteen boyfriends. Am I "severe"? What, exactly, is that supposed to mean? I'm a good deal happier than many people who do want those things. I'm well on the way to finding my own little autistic-shaped niche in the world. And I'm pretty sure functioning levels are worse than useless when it comes to categorizing us.

Edit: I'm sorry if that sounded harsh. I am being a bit blunt here, I think. Please don't assume I'm attacking anything other than an idea; I don't make a practice of attacking people.


I love reading your posts. :)