Misanthropy

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During the past few years I have gradually come to loathe human beings and society. I currently have 2 friends and I find it impossible to start new friendships. I do have a few acquaintances but I never really develop a friendship with them, though I usually like these people when I meet them, I start to dislike them after a while. It seems like I can only perceive their negative traits after I've known them for a certain time.

People pretty much annoy me with everything they do nowadays. They all seem incredibly stupid and self-centered to me. I am also very distrustful of their motives when I'm dealing with them. Perhaps this is because people took advantage of my kindness when I was younger. After this had happened a certain amount of times, I no longer felt the desire to be kind to people. Though I had more friends when I was still a "nice guy", I didn't really feel happier back then. In fact, severing all ties with a few friends from the past actually benefited me in several ways. Though I have less friends than ever, I'm performing better than ever in my studies. I can't help but feel that humans and society are out to destroy me (the competition) in order to benefit themselves. Not only when it comes to school, but in everyday life. People are always talking behind your back in order to make you look worse and to make themselves look better.

It's not that I particularly enjoy my isolation. I often wish I had more friends, but I simply seem to dislike everyone I meet. I do try to give every person I meet a chance, but it often happens a person makes a remark during the first conversation which makes me take an instant dislike towards them. Sometimes my hatred for other people worries me. I wonder if I'll eventually end up all alone. My family are pretty much the only people I care for. I can't even begin to imagine that I'll ever meet a girl to whom I'll be able to relate to enough to start a family with.

I have witnessed similar feelings in some comments here. Therefore I was wondering if anyone can relate to this and how they coped with it?

I go between feeling this way and liking socializing. The secret is to not expect much of other people. All humans have problems but they're all different too. I have thought it would be nice to have been born in a world with more advanced beings who were more logical, but I wasn't so I will do what I can with what I got. It's best to just accept what they are. I think of it like I am an alien here visiting alone and not to expect anything out of people. Honestly I haven't even been able to relate to other people with Asperger's. I doubt I will ever find someone like me but I have to accept that because there is no point dwelling on it. Humans are quite entertaining anyways.