How do you feel about being labelled an introvert?

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BugsBunnyFan
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28 Nov 2021, 1:52 pm

I don’t care for it. When I was younger I was sort of forced to be alone because I was too weird. Now I’m scared of being judged. It’s also way easier to come across as normal and shy than normal and outgoing. Even if you’re naturally outgoing or extroverted.

I’m using the words shy and introverted interchangeably because from the outside they are. I don’t feel comfortable labelling myself as introverted. I’m forced into an introverted lifestyle and I’m not happy about it. I do a lot of things to simulate an extroverted lifestyle just to survive. If I don’t I get very depressed and antsy. Maybe I’m introverted, but I don’t have enough of a social life to meet my needs.



Edna3362
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28 Nov 2021, 7:57 pm

I was like, "uhh sure". :shrug:

Except it doesn't entirely fit me at all.
Not even during my worst years when I hated the idea of socializing.
There are simply plenty of contradictions in my subjective experience and objectively observed behaviors.

The same can be said with being labeled an extrovert, which is only more apparent.
And this culture is blatant leaning towards extroversion.
Thus why many thought why I'm an introvert.



Until I found the label ambivert. :lol: Which resonates more.
It turns out my 'introversion' leanings are more tied with my own autism -- something more to do with being prone to sensory overload and overwhelm, state of caution and moments with energy issues.


Anyways, I never associated introversion as something negative or aversive to whatever culture I landed.
I also learned the very contrast between asocial from antisocial when it comes to the informal associations of introversion.
I'm asocial, not antisocial.

Probably because I grew up with a proud, well socialized and a high functioning introvert.


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CinderashAutomaton
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29 Nov 2021, 3:33 am

It's a convenient way that allows other people to be more accommodating of you when they have the very simplistic idea and expectation that everyone should be the same, but as you and your peers grow older and more mature (for those who actually do grow) it becomes kind of a restraining expectation when people categorize everyone into two rigid behavioral profiles.

It's an oversimplification that is often proved wrong: certain people may TEND to behave closer to one extreme than the other but that doesn't actually limit a person's choice of action.

What I see now is a far more complex behavioral system where each circumstance should be assessed on an instance by instance basis. People are not so simple that they only ever have just one of two levers to pull for the rest of their life...and I can't but feel like I'm talking to children when I meet people who genuinely believe that.


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29 Nov 2021, 10:16 am

I don't think of it as a "label". I think of it as an "adjective". In my case, a very accurate adjective.

I have found it can be a useful adjective. It is a convenient, concise way to explain to someone (generally my bride) that I don't want to interact but it is not because I am angry or upset with them.

I was professionally tested for Myers-Briggs Type in 1990 (not just me...it was a corporate fad and the organization I worked in had us tested), and later in the 1990s tested again. I was consistently typed as INTJ, with clear preferences for N & J and very clear preferences for I & T.

I think extroverts are at least slightly strange. (Ditto for Allistics.)


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29 Nov 2021, 10:24 am

I have no problem with being called that. It is very accurate. I have my inner world in my head that I live in, so why does it matter? My department members nearly went crazy during COVID restrictions because they could not see each other in person. I loved every minute that I did not have to see them in person. They cannot understand why that was the case. Those restrictions were a blessing to me.



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29 Nov 2021, 10:26 am

BugsBunnyFan wrote:
How do you feel about being labelled an introvert?
It does not bother me at all, because it would sure beat being labelled a narcissist, a pedophile, or a Republican!



naturalplastic
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29 Nov 2021, 2:20 pm

My opponent, in this election is....a shameless extravert, an admitted Homosapien, and his wife is a known thespian!

As Twice said above its more of adjective than a "label". And its quite useful.

If the issues is that you think the adjective itself as having some kind of stigma then thats ridiculous. Whether you are an introvert or an extravert its like whether you're right handed, or left handed. Either way its nothing that any sane person would be ashamed of.

Being labeled a "PER vert" is something else though. But I digress.

Extravert just means you're outgoing and socially oriented. An introvert just means that you're more inward oriented, and like that.

But if the issue is accuracy, and not shame, then thats something else. Ive taken the Myers Brigg test more than once in my life. It judges you along sliding scales. I always get "introvert", but have gotten progressively more towards the mean (moved more towards the extravert direction) over time as scored on the test. And both things seem accurate (that I am an introvert, but gotten less exteme over time).



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29 Nov 2021, 2:24 pm

It is not a label, it is a fact of life. I don't feel anything about it.


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Fnord
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29 Nov 2021, 2:47 pm

naturalplastic wrote:
My opponent, in this election is....a shameless extravert, an admitted Homosapien, and his wife is a known thespian! ...
I hear they osculate and even masticate in public!



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29 Nov 2021, 3:34 pm

naturalplastic wrote:
My opponent, in this election is....a shameless extravert, an admitted Homosapien, and his wife is a known thespian!

As Twice said above its more of adjective than a "label". And its quite useful.

If the issues is that you think the adjective itself as having some kind of stigma then thats ridiculous. Whether you are an introvert or an extravert its like whether you're right handed, or left handed. Either way its nothing that any sane person would be ashamed of.

Being labeled a "PER vert" is something else though. But I digress.

Extravert just means you're outgoing and socially oriented. An introvert just means that you're more inward oriented, and like that.

But if the issue is accuracy, and not shame, then thats something else. Ive taken the Myers Brigg test more than once in my life. It judges you along sliding scales. I always get "introvert", but have gotten progressively more towards the mean (moved more towards the extravert direction) over time as scored on the test. And both things seem accurate (that I am an introvert, but gotten less exteme over time).

I feel like I’m right in the middle, which is more important than being an introvert or extravert. I act like an “introvert” because I find most people patronizing and annoying. Introvert is a convenient label because people can just say I don’t hate everyone and I’m just a huge introvert. When I get into interactions where things flow and people aren’t being patronizing I turn into an extrovert. Or maybe that’s just the way I naturally am and I’m forced to be an introvert. Too bad I’m too awkward to find a lot of satisfying interactions. Maybe feeling like everyone is being patronizing towards me is anxiety or paranoia. Either way that isn’t the same thing as introversion.



naturalplastic
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29 Nov 2021, 3:37 pm

Fnord wrote:
naturalplastic wrote:
My opponent, in this election is....a shameless extravert, an admitted Homosapien, and his wife is a known thespian! ...
I hear they osculate and even masticate in public!


He has even gone on TV, to ENCOURAGE the young people of our state to indulge in ...matriculation! 8O



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29 Nov 2021, 3:48 pm

naturalplastic wrote:
Fnord wrote:
naturalplastic wrote:
My opponent, in this election is....a shameless extravert, an admitted Homosapien, and his wife is a known thespian! ...
I hear they osculate and even masticate in public!
He has even gone on TV, to ENCOURAGE the young people of our state to indulge in ... matriculation!
With most of the viewing audience afflicted with peniaphobia?  Say it ain't so!



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29 Nov 2021, 4:15 pm

I would say the term introvert fits me. I prefer to be alone most of the time, and I bond deeply with a few friends and family.


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29 Nov 2021, 5:05 pm

Note that Myers & Briggs "Extraversion" is not the same as being sociable or outgoing.

A Myers & Briggs Introvert can seem to be outgoing and sociable. I am absolutely definitely a Myers & Briggs Introvert but on several occasions when I told people that they immediately disagreed. Because I was polite, reasonably cheerful, and actively talking to them they assumed I was an extrovert. What they were missing was that chatting and socializing with them was an effort for me...it was tiring, not fun.

For more information on this see The Myers & Briggs Foundation's web page "Extraversion or Introversion." When I say I am an Introvert I mean in the Myers & Briggs sense...others here might be using the word differently.


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30 Nov 2021, 2:38 am

If calling me an introvert helps people leave me alone for 23 hours a day I'm all for it.



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30 Nov 2021, 2:58 am

If you can know what you are and get comfortable with it, the desire to control what other people think of or label you diminishes considerably.


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