Language Abilities(Tony Attwood1)

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Ok, because I find Tony Attwood's tome on Aspergers to be very interesting and relevant to myself, and no doubt, to others, I have decided to focus on some of the things that stood out to me particularly and which I underlined as I think they might make good discussion starting points.

Writing is the ONLY way I can express myself. If I have to verbalize something, I come across as a complete idiot because I can't get the words out.

I, yes.

That's very true of me although I can talk about work matters. I never "speak" of anything personal, but on the rare occasion someone gets me to actually write about myself, they usually just say, Wow. That's because I come across to everyone as completely emotionless in the real world. I am also awkward and inept at speaking about emotions or even myself. My eye will start twitching, I twist my hands, I rock from foot to foot and I look away. In NT speak that means I'm lying and I haven't even said anything.

I think part of that is that I can't tell how people are reacting to what I am saying so that unnerves me and part is because for some reason emotional display overwhelms me. If I type it, I can feel disconnected and still say what I feel. Or as one co-worker said, I can be disembodied text.

I can relate to that...

That quote holds true for me sometimes, but it really depends how im feeling about the topic.

Very true for me when I had speech, but not just about emotional things, about anything. (And speech wasn't just inexpressive, but often expressive of the wrong thing by a longshot.)

I express myself far better in writing than I do with the spoken word, unless I am talking about my favorite things, especially cats.

It's very true for me. I think it's a natural part of having predominantly non-verbal thinking, regardless of whether one is autistic or not. It's difficult translating imagery into words, and even more difficult when there are no images, just silent emotions in an otherwise "empty" mind. I constantly find myself stumbling over my words, searching for the right ones because they don't come easily, and often failing to find them. Because of that, my sentences are usually not too coherent, and I sometimes use gestures to fill up the gaps and make it easier to get my meaning across. (It's especially true when I talk about things which I can visualize very vividly, usually some objects. Say, if I'm talking about a triptych, my hands naturally start showing the shape of it - palms against each other in front of me, then moving away from each other, and sideways at an angle; when I'm saying "holes in the board" describing a board game, my finger will draw circles in the air in front of me, or on the table, and when I say "those plants, with winding stems", my hands will twine showing the shape of the plants. It's somehow easier that way, when my hands trace the outlines of the image I have in my mind).

With writing, when I have time to think about what I'm saying, and can correct it as much as I like, it is a lot easier. I also noticed one thing. I'm often not sure how to describe the mood I am in, that is, to me it's very clear but I hardly know what it's called - it usually happens with emotions that cause a physical reaction (anxiety, panic, fear, worry, etc), which I have difficulty telling from each other almost all the time, but sometimes I can't even say for sure if I am cheerful or sad. But, once I work through it deliberately in writing, and think carefully how to describe my state of mind and the way it makes me see the surrounding world, I realize what the feeling is. That's why I find keeping a journal very useful - it is a great help in defining my own feelings for myself.

Absolutely true for me!! No doubt about it.

YEEEEAAAAH!! !! ! i sometimes feel that i cant talk to a person unless i write it, or unless i know that person well enough. but other than that its only a minor trouble for me to look at someone and talk.

MakazeAkumaBatsu

Totally true, Graelwyn.

I've learned to express myself well verbally on nonpersonal, nonemotion-laden topics.

I've noticed, to my embarrassment, though, that still, after all these years, when I try to talk about
my feelings to even my dearest friends, I get overexcited, jittery, repeat myself, and don't speak at all up to my abilities.
However, when I write about them, I am usually highly articulate, eloquent even.

DD

Thought I should add this: That's when I even manage to verbalize anything about the feelings at all....

DD