Worrying about leaving objects in a burning house

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Joe90
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04 Jul 2015, 4:11 pm

Do other Aspies feel this way? When people talk about fire safety, the last thing on their mind is the well-being of objects that are left inside the building. I know I probably sound crazy saying this, but I 'feel sorry' for objects being left inside the building to burn. Not saying I care more about objects than people and animals, but I'd be lying if I said objects aren't equally as important as living beings to me.

Maybe replaceable objects like a settee or a table need not be as important, but losing cherished possessions that are irreplaceable is like losing a loved one to me. So whenever we have a storm, as much as I love storms, I worry about lightening hitting my house and being unable to save my precious possessions. I feel like keeping all my favourite stuff in a fire-proof box near the window so it can quickly be saved, but that is going a bit extreme.

I've read about having a lightening protection thing installed, but apparently it's expensive and I can't afford to pay for it myself, and my family won't want to because they think that it won't happen to our house. But I always like to prepare for the worst, then I can relax and enjoy thunderstorms.

Does anyone else feel so attached to objects like you do your family, that you want to be one step ahead from house fires?


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HighLlama
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04 Jul 2015, 4:13 pm

Yes, I can relate to that. Especially since there are times I may not be able to sleep if I'm excited to listen to a new album I bought. I don't think the object is more valuable than a living thing, of course, but I tend to have better experiences with most objects :)



AuroraBorealisGazer
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04 Jul 2015, 4:39 pm

I feel the same way. I anthropomorphize my things (actually, things in general, they don't have to be mine) and get very attached to them. I often go over, in my head, my escape procedure if something were to happen. My cat would obviously be my first priority, but from there I'd grab my favorite (and lifelong) stuffed animal, my laptop and binder (since they have all of my poems/writings/drawings/and photos)...and then I lament all of my other things that I likely wouldn't have time to grab.



BirdInFlight
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04 Jul 2015, 4:50 pm

I feel exactly the same way, the same set of fears.

And yes, my pets and other people would be a priority, but I'm almost equally sh!tting myself whenever I contemplate how to save my most meaningful belongings too. I too don't care about replaceables like the couch or kitchen gadgets or stupid things, but I do care about family photos, my journals, books that belonged to my late mother, and other deeply sentimental items.

There was a thread recently about whether or not you attach emotionally to objects, and while many responded that they did not, I'm one who strongly does. I have worried about "what if there's a fire" pretty much as far back as I can remember.

It may help to ease your worries if you write out a plan for that scenario even if it may never happen. It probably will never happen, but it may help you feel more power over your fears if you form a plan anyway. Write out what to grab first and where that's located, that kind of thing. Formulating what you would actually do and where your most important things are located might set your mind at rest on a practical level, because having a plan gives you control should the worst happen, and if it never happens there's no harm done.



Callista
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04 Jul 2015, 4:59 pm

Even NTs do.

When a person "loses everything" in a fire, even if they and their families survive completely unhurt and have insurance or savings to rebuild, their communities often feel quite sorry for them and come together to support them. People know that losing all your personal possessions represents a major loss even though those possessions are technically "just things". Whether it's a photograph, a child's stuffed animal, or your favorite pair of jeans, losing them is like losing a little bit of yourself, and that's true for NTs, too.

You aren't alone. Worrying about losing your possessions is something many people do, and perhaps because you are autistic, your connection to your possessions (which are objects and so are easier to understand than people) may be stronger than most people's.

Just like with any loss, people who lose their possessions in a house fire may grieve that loss--but grief ends, and people recover, and rebuild. If you did lose your possessions in a fire, you would do the same. You would feel sad; but then you would recover your equilibrium and rebuild your life.


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04 Jul 2015, 5:29 pm

Three days ago a person from the "fire-safety" (I hope it is the right word) came to check my place.
It is unsafe as there is only one exit and he explained that I needed smoke detectors and a fire-extinguisher.
And my place is small, but devided over two floors and I have three cats and I was very worried about the cats in case of fire.
He said that I had to get an outside-attached ladder from 2nd floor where my bedroom is.
And that I have to climb it down in case of fire to get myself into safety.
And I said "What about my my cats?" as they sleep in my bedroom every night.
He said that the regulations do not care about cats but only humans but that I would have to rescue the cats via the ladder,
So I concluded: I have to go down the ladder to bring myself into safety, and then I have to go back up to safe the first cat and then the second and then the third.
He started to laugh, that I first go out to bring myself into safety and then return to get the cats.
He said, that he had an autistic daughter who was reasoning the same way I did.
To me my cats are most important in case of fire.
I am attached to my objects as well, but my cats are most important to me. (also the little Steiff-toy-cat I got at age 2).


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Eloa
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04 Jul 2015, 5:46 pm

My friend said that I just had to throw the cats out of second floor out of the window, that they would not get hurt.
But is it true?
If I would throw them far enoug (1.5 meters) they would land on grass and can escape.


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04 Jul 2015, 9:10 pm

I have tons of cartoon drawings and hand-made mini comics and illustrated stories I've made over the years. If they got destroyed in a fire or any kind of disaster it would be like losing family members. Stuff like furniture and clothes can be replaced (as long as you have money and insurance, anyway). There is no way I'd be able to rewrite and replace them all. I hardly ever even feel like making new comics or stories any more. Sometimes I wish I had something fireproof to store them in, like a safe. My own little personal Disney Vault. :)
Except it wouldn't be that little, more like the size of a refrigerator.



Callista
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04 Jul 2015, 9:55 pm

Eloa wrote:
My friend said that I just had to throw the cats out of second floor out of the window, that they would not get hurt.
But is it true?
If I would throw them far enoug (1.5 meters) they would land on grass and can escape.
Cats are small, and are more likely to survive such a fall without injuries than a human would be. Landing in grass would help. If you cannot get your cats into a carrier and get them out, it would be a reasonable option to get them out the window that way. In fact, it's a reasonable option for you, too. If you have no ladder, climb out the window, hang from the sill, and drop from there. You would survive the fall, though minor injuries are likely.

As for the cats, always have as many carriers as you have cats, and be able to get them into those carriers in case an evacuation is needed.


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Eloa
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05 Jul 2015, 5:14 am

Callista wrote:
Eloa wrote:
My friend said that I just had to throw the cats out of second floor out of the window, that they would not get hurt.
But is it true?
If I would throw them far enoug (1.5 meters) they would land on grass and can escape.
Cats are small, and are more likely to survive such a fall without injuries than a human would be. Landing in grass would help. If you cannot get your cats into a carrier and get them out, it would be a reasonable option to get them out the window that way. In fact, it's a reasonable option for you, too. If you have no ladder, climb out the window, hang from the sill, and drop from there. You would survive the fall, though minor injuries are likely.

As for the cats, always have as many carriers as you have cats, and be able to get them into those carriers in case an evacuation is needed.


Thanks.
I have carriers, one double and one single, but they really hate going into them and by trying to get them inside I might cause them to panick.
Now I think too that the window would be the best flight-option.
And when I have smoke detectors (technically I have already bought two, but I cannot fix them to the ceiling, my friend wants to do it, but I wait already for 2 weeks for him to do it), the high-pitched sound of it would make them flight immediately out of the cat flap, which is built in into the wall ground floor, and as this place is small and when the smoke detectors detect early fire development I think they might get out on time through the cat flap.
I can get from the sill onto the roller shutter box 1st floor, but there is also a ladder next to my window, but it is not attached to the wall and a bit short, but it might serve as well.


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AuroraBorealisGazer
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05 Jul 2015, 10:57 am

Eloa wrote:
Callista wrote:
Eloa wrote:
My friend said that I just had to throw the cats out of second floor out of the window, that they would not get hurt.
But is it true?
If I would throw them far enoug (1.5 meters) they would land on grass and can escape.
Cats are small, and are more likely to survive such a fall without injuries than a human would be. Landing in grass would help. If you cannot get your cats into a carrier and get them out, it would be a reasonable option to get them out the window that way. In fact, it's a reasonable option for you, too. If you have no ladder, climb out the window, hang from the sill, and drop from there. You would survive the fall, though minor injuries are likely.

As for the cats, always have as many carriers as you have cats, and be able to get them into those carriers in case an evacuation is needed.


Thanks.
I have carriers, one double and one single, but they really hate going into them and by trying to get them inside I might cause them to panick.
Now I think too that the window would be the best flight-option.
And when I have smoke detectors (technically I have already bought two, but I cannot fix them to the ceiling, my friend wants to do it, but I wait already for 2 weeks for him to do it), the high-pitched sound of it would make them flight immediately out of the cat flap, which is built in into the wall ground floor, and as this place is small and when the smoke detectors detect early fire development I think they might get out on time through the cat flap.
I can get from the sill onto the roller shutter box 1st floor, but there is also a ladder next to my window, but it is not attached to the wall and a bit short, but it might serve as well.



They sell these baby rescue sacks on Amazon, that you could fit 2-3 cats in. That way you could all get out in one trip. Here's what it looks like: Fire Escape

For their carriers, I always leave mine out so that my cat doesn't associate it with unpleasant activities like going to the vet. I've done this with previous cats and I have friend who does it too, and the cats willingly go into their carriers.



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05 Jul 2015, 11:07 am

I have a bug-out-bag which includes my flash drives with computer backup files (including all my financial and genealogical records). I have my firearms and very few must-take items. Unless my house is fully involved, I could easily gets these things together in 15 seconds. The more time I have, the more I can gather. Plan ahead with realistic goals.


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05 Jul 2015, 11:16 am

Well, you won't miss those objects if you don't make it outside in one piece.


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05 Jul 2015, 11:36 am

AspieUtah wrote:
I have a bug-out-bag which includes my flash drives with computer backup files (including all my financial and genealogical records). I have my firearms and very few must-take items. Unless my house is fully involved, I could easily gets these things together in 15 seconds. The more time I have, the more I can gather. Plan ahead with realistic goals.
Very recommended. It doesn't need to be fancy; just supplies to keep you alive and reasonably comfortable for about 24-72 hours. Take into account the disasters that are most likely to happen in your area; for me, that's flooding, tornadoes, and civil unrest since I live near a big city. And remember the weather; if you are caught without shelter, you might have to cope with heat or cold.

Having small, useful preparations like this goes a long way toward lessening the impact of natural disasters. If citizens can take care of themselves for a short while, then the resources can go toward the hardest hit--the poor, the ones who weren't prepared or couldn't access their supplies, the ones with small children, those separated from their families, the disabled, etc. Being prepared yourself can actually save someone's life, though you may never know that it did.

As for firearms, I wouldn't bother particularly. Even though riots are one of the things I've taken into account, I think if I had to, I simply couldn't pull the trigger. I have too much of a mental block against hurting people, even if they pose a threat to me; since I couldn't kill someone, I have never considered carrying a gun. Additionally, since I have a history of recurrent depression, I don't like to have in easy reach anything that I could use to kill myself before I had the chance to think about it. If you're like me--either have depression or don't want to kill anyone ever--then pack some pepper spray and decide ahead of time that you will run as a first resort.

Violence between people, in most situations, is not something I worry about during a natural disaster. People instinctively tend to help each other. It's only the civil-unrest scenario that would really create that kind of a problem, and in that situation my primary plan is to simply stay put, keep quiet, and help my neighbors do the same if necessary. (That's assuming that, depending on the source of the civil unrest, I am not out there somewhere holding a protest sign and trying to keep people from throwing punches.)


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05 Jul 2015, 12:18 pm

AuroraBorealisGazer wrote:
Eloa wrote:
Callista wrote:
Eloa wrote:
My friend said that I just had to throw the cats out of second floor out of the window, that they would not get hurt.
But is it true?
If I would throw them far enoug (1.5 meters) they would land on grass and can escape.
Cats are small, and are more likely to survive such a fall without injuries than a human would be. Landing in grass would help. If you cannot get your cats into a carrier and get them out, it would be a reasonable option to get them out the window that way. In fact, it's a reasonable option for you, too. If you have no ladder, climb out the window, hang from the sill, and drop from there. You would survive the fall, though minor injuries are likely.

As for the cats, always have as many carriers as you have cats, and be able to get them into those carriers in case an evacuation is needed.


Thanks.
I have carriers, one double and one single, but they really hate going into them and by trying to get them inside I might cause them to panick.
Now I think too that the window would be the best flight-option.
And when I have smoke detectors (technically I have already bought two, but I cannot fix them to the ceiling, my friend wants to do it, but I wait already for 2 weeks for him to do it), the high-pitched sound of it would make them flight immediately out of the cat flap, which is built in into the wall ground floor, and as this place is small and when the smoke detectors detect early fire development I think they might get out on time through the cat flap.
I can get from the sill onto the roller shutter box 1st floor, but there is also a ladder next to my window, but it is not attached to the wall and a bit short, but it might serve as well.



They sell these baby rescue sacks on Amazon, that you could fit 2-3 cats in. That way you could all get out in one trip. Here's what it looks like: Fire Escape

For their carriers, I always leave mine out so that my cat doesn't associate it with unpleasant activities like going to the vet. I've done this with previous cats and I have friend who does it too, and the cats willingly go into their carriers.


These rescue sacks are awesome, hope to find them for a lower price.
Thanks for the link.
The carriers are on to op the bedroom closet, I do not have much space.


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05 Jul 2015, 4:45 pm

I'm rather unaware when it comes to fire risk, which is strange because I'm very risk-averse about most things. I think it comes from working in a place that had tedious evacuation precedures and horribly noisy fire alarms that often went off although we never had an actual fire. They also had cumbersome fire doors that made it hard to carry stuff around the building. I hate obstacles and interruptions when I'm trying to get my work done. Don't get me started on smoke detectors.

I'd hate to lose my stuff, that's for sure. I don't know what I'd do if I lost it, but I don't think it would be quite as bad as losing the people I love.

I have put some thought into backing up my millions of precious computer documents and files, and I've worked out that I need two complete, up-to-date backups of everything, and that I should locate them in separate buildings. But keeping them up to date would be very tedious and I'd probably never get anything else done if I really tried to do it right.

My home is a bit of a tinderbox, and I hope to make it safer one day, when I get organised. Oh dear.

Still, looking around, most people's homes don't burn down. Maybe I'm more likely to die from another cause? My stuff isn't going to be much use to me if I'm dead.