When your friends and family agree...

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Years ago when I asked some friends and family about AS, I got reactions like "I figured out you had that a long time ago, I didn't say anything because I assumed you probably knew already" and "OMG she didn't know!"

So I put it out there on Facebook not long ago. The reactions were like "we love your quirkiness" and "Your bird fixation makes you an excellent birder!"

Nobody disagreed... are the perceptions of friends/family usually correct?

To some extent I think that the people around you know you better and so should pick up on these things easier. On the other hand, the dynamic with them may be different.

My husband says to me that I'm probably imagining some of the stuff that worries me. "Everyone drifts apart from their friends..." is a big one. But, as I've explained to him, he doesn't see HOW I continually drift apart. He doesn't see how I interact with people when he's not around. He's always become a bit of a 'safety barrier' because he steps in when I struggle, and a lot of the time he doesn't even realise he's doing it. So, whilst he sees the most relaxed and 'at ease' me, he doesn't see the other side of the 'real me' - the me that's a social disaster when nobody is around to take over! He's probably a bit clueless about the extent to which I mess up when talking to people.

That said, when the GP asked him yesterday if he believed I could have autism, he said (and I could tell he was being genuine and not 'backing me up') "Ever since I met her, she's come across as awkward." Thanks a lot!

I think he's always known that there was something there. I imagine he was probably more aware of it when he didn't know me as well. Over time we've become comfortable together - he probably doesn't notice my odd or unusual behaviours quite as much, because he sees me every day and he knows the most relaxed and 'rounded' me. Plus, he gets to hear my explanations for why I do things whilst others just see me doing them.

I'm of the opinion that people that are close to you can be both more aware and less aware at the same time which, I would imagine, is why they didn't speak up but have said that they could 'tell'.

My own husband won't listen to anything about disorders, he stops the conversation, but he's come up with stuff like "you don't put yourself in my shoes!" and "you don't give people enough eye contact! (I thought I was)"

Therapists/docs that thought I had it all have said I'm too mild for a dx and problems like bipolar are what need to be addressed.