self absorbed

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greetings all,

i have been told that i am too self absorbed... i tend to be inward most of the time. i self analyze, obsess, and talk about myself to great extent. the thing is, that when able, i would do anything for most, however, i live in my mind and have a very difficult escaping from it or its hold over my being. i don't feel as if i am selfish, in fact am quite selfless most of the time.

i want so much to think outside of my own self, however nobody else lives in my mind or knows, sees, or feels as i do.
anyone else know what i am saying?

with peace,
JanusOne

Yup, same here.

There's so much going on in my head; how am I supposed to focus on the outside world? It's too confusing!

I feel that I live in my mind while other people live in the world around them.

I'm in the same boat, my friend. I wish I knew something to say to help, but I haven't figured it out either, yet.

I think I'm like this too because I get caught up in my own world and analyze things about myself, but I'm not a selfish person.

I know a guy on the spectrum like that, it gets quite tiring.

Ive been told i talk too long about a single topic but never about myself. Althouh i even believe i can be pretty self absorbed, ive been told my sister is worse though.

Some NT's think that being quiet is somehow selfish. The NT's that hold this belief are usually the super social ones. If they're overly social, they tend to think conversation is the sole purpose of the group, therefore they see quietness as a failure to contribute to the group-- that's why you're selfish to them. Personally I would ignore those comments, unless the people making them are having a negative impact on your socialization, then I would explain to them that I'm just a quiet person and I contribute in other ways they may not understand-- obviously pointing out those contributions.

I myself am also a fairly quiet person, but I'm generally not thinking about myself. If my mind isn't solving a problem I tend to feel depressed. When I have nothing interesting to ponder I'll go through math problems, review music composition techniques, or review all sorts of other data I know to keep it cataloged correctly. Interestingly I'm pretty good with that stuff, but if a person asks me what we were talking about an hour ago, I couldn't tell you-- my mind just doesn't catalog personal information all that well, even when I focus on it. I eventually remember, but it's this weird thing where I have to trace back steps in the conversation to remember, whereas my data memory is pretty much instantaneous. So yeah I get the selfish thing sometimes, even though it's unintentional. That's why I just ignore when someone says it, it's not something I can change so I'm not going to waste energy worrying about it.

Don't do that, lol. The less you do, the better you'll feel, and you'll have a lot more time to do other things you like.
Too much self analysis can lead to an erosion of confidence, which can lead to depression, which can lead to the dark side of the force...

edit: typo that turned into the wrong word and made me feel really stupid. It happens.

Last edited by Aristophanes on 29 Jun 2016, 9:26 pm, edited 1 time in total.

This is a problem for me, too. Self-obsession.
But it's a problem because I get so caught up and just repeat the same things over and over and over and it gets properly obsessive. All about myself and my own issues. I don't talk about them, because I'm embarrassed and don't talk much anyway, but they're there in my head all the time.
I find that is it likely due to having a very active mind, and if you don't provide a mind like that with stimulus, it must attack something and the only thing left is you. So, I find having things going on in the exterior world to take that attention off yourself is helpful, and provide something else for your mind to work on. Maybe that's where special interests come in? To provide over active autistic minds with something to worry at?