NT phrases or questions that drive you nuts!

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Skilpadde
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06 Sep 2016, 10:37 am

"Addicting"

no, the game you're talking about is not "addicting". It's addictive.


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BenderRodriguez
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06 Sep 2016, 1:35 pm

Any phrase starting with "you should...", particularly when no one asked for their opinion or "but you can't..."

Just watch me :twisted:


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Chromolicious
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06 Sep 2016, 2:23 pm

"Go with your gut feeling. Your gut feeling is never wrong."

What?? This is incorrect on so many levels! Firstly, what has your alimentary canal got to do with intuition?
And secondly, how can intuition never be wrong? It is a decision based on a feeling that cannot be articulated. There is no reasoning involved and you don't even know why you feel the way you do! Of course that method of decision making can be wrong!!


Another one is "over thinking"!
I mean you either make a conscious effort to think or you make a quick decision without giving it much thought. If you're going to put thought into it, you are going to go through all relevant material to ensure you make the best decision. That's just called thinking. Where even is the line between thinking and over thinking?!


All innane phrases and questions annoy me. Why would a shop keeper or stranger at the bus stop feel the need to say "the weather's getting very cold now." Why yes, it is, what's your point?
As someone on an earlier page said - I just cannot understand why the do it. Okay, to be friendly. How is saying something pointless about the weather being friendly?
Even more confusing is the "how are you?" question most people have mentioned and other similar questions.
How could it be perceived as friendly to be so blatently dishonest and indifferent? Asking someone a question which you don't care to know the answer to is illogical, unproductive, and actually kind of disrespectful! Quite unfriendly actually!


And obviously there's all the cliched phrases people say when faced with certain situations. You go through a break up, "plenty more fish in the sea". Someone repeated a prior behaviour, "a leopard can't change its spots". Something upsetting happens like you lose your job "every cloud has a silver lining".
What does any of it mean??! !!
What is the point in saying any of that? It doesn't help in any way! Nobody feels better when they hear these things! They are all just stupid programmed robotic phrases programmed into people to say at certain times!
Infuriating!! !



Last edited by Chromolicious on 06 Sep 2016, 4:12 pm, edited 1 time in total.

dianthus
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06 Sep 2016, 4:00 pm

Chromolicious wrote:
And obviously there's all the cliched phrases people say when faced with certain situations. You go through a break up, "plenty more fish in the sea". Someone repeated a prior behaviour, "a leopard can't change its spots". Something upsetting happens like you lose your job "every cloud has a silver lining".


I know I can't stand these kinds of sayings...it is not helpful at all and people usually act so smug when they say these things. I especially dislike religious sayings such as:

It's all part of god's plan
The lord never gives you more than you can handle
When god closes a door he opens a window
The lord helps those who help themselves

And worst of all, the things people say to someone who is bereaved...

He/she is in a better place now / at peace now / not suffering anymore.
At least you still have...(your children, your spouse, the other parent, etc.)
(when someone loses a child) You can always have more children.



DataB4
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06 Sep 2016, 5:47 pm

"You can always have more children?" Wow, I think that's the worst one of all 10 pages of this thread.

I also hate the fish in the sea analogy for someone whose just ended a relationship. It trivializes the feelings they still might have for their former partner. I know people don't usually mean it like that, but the phrase still stinks in that context.



Kuraudo777
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06 Sep 2016, 5:53 pm

"You'll be fine." Um...thanks, but how can you be so sure?


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dianthus
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06 Sep 2016, 8:13 pm

DataB4 wrote:
I also hate the fish in the sea analogy for someone whose just ended a relationship. It trivializes the feelings they still might have for their former partner. I know people don't usually mean it like that, but the phrase still stinks in that context.


Yeah I really hate that saying...I mean not like it's just annoying, people have said it to me when I was feeling devastated over the loss of a relationship and that was really hurtful. It's one of those things where I just don't have the inclination to assume they mean well. It comes across as a really shallow thing to say and it makes me wonder what kind of person they are to look at it that way...like do they have so little attachment or emotion invested in their own relationships with people. To me it just reflects poorly on anyone who says it...it's also very crass when men say it in reference to dating women.

Another one I really dislike is the one about kissing a lot of frogs before you find your prince...this is just so incredibly juvenile and I can't believe that grown women are so brainwashed by fairytales they can say stuff like this.



FluttercordAspie93
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06 Sep 2016, 8:19 pm

So, I guess you could say this is kind of related: 8 Things Not To Say To a Female With Aspergers.

I came across this a few days ago, and I found it pretty interesting.



CCninja86
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07 Sep 2016, 2:45 am

BenderRodriguez wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
Yep....that "what do you do for a living?" question drives me bonkers. I wish I was a teacher or something of that ilk--but, alas, I am what I am. Which is really okay with me, most of the time.


Yeah, I dislike people who act as if your job (or sometimes marital status) defines you. Nothing wrong with what you do for a living, kraftiekortie.

ToughDiamond wrote:
C2V wrote:
I hate cutesy baby speak.
I was reading an article on how to care for ferrets to prepare for getting one as a pet, and instead of just referring to them as "ferrets" you get all this putrid baby speak - "fuzzy wuzzle bums," "fur bubbies," "fuzzies."
Similarly grinding are the rhyming variety - I have a relative who does this for everything and it drives me bats. Instead of just saying she enjoyed her food, she'll say sh!t like "yummy yummy in my tummy wummy."
Just don't. We're not infants, it's not cute.

Oh crikey I hate it when people get all sloppy with animals like that. Seems rather common among American women, I've not seen it so much in the UK thank Christ. I don't even think it's necessary with baby humans.


I can't stand that kind of stuff either. Sometimes I swear the children or even the animals themselves look embarrassed :P


Same. I'll often call my cat "sweetie" when I greet her, like "hey sweetie!", but that's about it, everything else makes me uncomfortable.


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Skilpadde
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07 Sep 2016, 6:41 am

Chromolicious wrote:
All innane phrases and questions annoy me. Why would a shop keeper or stranger at the bus stop feel the need to say "the weather's getting very cold now." Why yes, it is, what's your point?
As someone on an earlier page said - I just cannot understand why the do it. Okay, to be friendly. How is saying something pointless about the weather being friendly?
Even more confusing is the "how are you?" question most people have mentioned and other similar questions.
How could it be perceived as friendly to be so blatently dishonest and indifferent? Asking someone a question which you don't care to know the answer to is illogical, unproductive, and actually kind of disrespectful! Quite unfriendly actually!
I really, really agree with this! To me, both of these are the very opposite of friendly or nice.


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BOLTZ 17/3 2012 - 12/11 2020
Beautiful, sweet, gentle, playful, loyal
simply the best and one of a kind
love you and miss you, dear boy

Stop the wolf kills! https://www.thepetitionsite.com/takeact ... 3091429765


Kenya
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07 Sep 2016, 9:08 am

Here are a few that really annoy the crap out of me:

"Rise and shine". To me, this saying just sounds incredibly f*****g stupid. I'm not bioluminescent so there's no way that I can "shine" or whatever the hell you want me to do. The fact that I'm not a morning person either certainly doesn't help.

"Ollie Ollie oxen free". Where the f**k did this even come from? To me, it's nothing but random nonsensical gibberish that has no place to be used.

And finally, while not really a saying, I really don't like when people do "the wave" at concerts. This mostly stems from when I used to swim for park and rec and, every swim meet we had for a while, the coach would lead us in this godawful cheer that incorporated a form of waving our hands back and forth. I've been trying to become more accepting of the wave as time has passed, but I'm still a long way off.



Chromolicious
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07 Sep 2016, 9:30 am

Kenya wrote:
And finally, while not really a saying, I really don't like when people do "the wave" at concerts.


Along a similar line of thought, most, if not all cultural actions or behaviours like this annoy me. Like clapping hands to show approval or appreciation. Standing as a mark or respect when an 'important' person enters. If you have to go to a religious ceremony, the way you're expected to do all the movements like standing and kneeling and whatever else. Shaking hands with people when you meet them. Rubbing or hugging as a show of support (well this may be at least partly related to tactile defensiveness). Smiling when there's nothing to smile about!!
I can't think of any more right now, but I know there are a lot more!!

It really is great to be able to say these things and know that others understand and agree! Any time I have ever said any of this to others, they all just give me that look. I don't know how to descibe the look. It's a baffled look I guess. With a bit of disapproval mixed in.



Dr.Pepper
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07 Sep 2016, 9:32 am

"How are you?" I've learned to say "good" or "fine," which is code for "hello" because I know when you say "how are you," you are actually saying "hello."

"It wasn't meant to be." You assume everyone you talk to is a creationist? A fatalist? You know I'm not yet you use that phrase anyway?

Making eye contact and smiling at me as we pass each other and expecting me to do the same. Why are we smiling? I just saw you earlier today. Or yesterday. Or last week. I'm not aware of anything between us that's changed.

"Let's meet for coffee." Do you really mean this or is this code for "it was nice talking to you?"

"Friend." What does this mean to you? When an NT says you're a "friend" they sometimes mean some shade of "acquaintance."

"Soon". As in "talk to you soon" or "we'll get together soon." When? You mean in an hour? A day? A week? Never?



Skilpadde
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07 Sep 2016, 12:46 pm

Chromolicious wrote:
It really is great to be able to say these things and know that others understand and agree! Any time I have ever said any of this to others, they all just give me that look. I don't know how to descibe the look. It's a baffled look I guess. With a bit of disapproval mixed in.
Yeah, I know that look. I've gotten that look.
WP has most definitely been a sanity saver for some of us. Here I can talk to people who think more similarly to me (at least when it comes to some things) and understand stuff about me that people fail to get IRL. That is possibly the greatest thing about being here; being understood and having one's experiences, reactions, feelings and thoughts validated.


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BOLTZ 17/3 2012 - 12/11 2020
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simply the best and one of a kind
love you and miss you, dear boy

Stop the wolf kills! https://www.thepetitionsite.com/takeact ... 3091429765


FluttercordAspie93
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07 Sep 2016, 1:10 pm

Kenya wrote:
"Ollie Ollie oxen free". Where the f**k did this even come from? To me, it's nothing but random nonsensical gibberish that has no place to be used.


Wait... People actually say this in real life? Just... Why? I thought this phrase only existed in fiction and cartoons... Glad I never experienced this one.



dianthus
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07 Sep 2016, 1:33 pm

Oh...here's one that really annoys the **** out of me...

"I'm down for anything"

It just makes me want to say...REALLY? 8O ANYTHING???? Sooooooo...if someone wants to tie you up in their basement, you "down" for that?

Same with the other variants like "I don't care" or "whatever you want to do" etc. it just makes me think...oh yeah you say that NOW but sooner or later you'll let it be known somehow you don't like the choice that was made...so why don't you just say up front what it is you want to do?

And what does that even mean, to be "down" for something? Didn't people used to say "I'm UP for anything"? Is this one of those backwards things like saying something good is bad?

I've heard whole conversations made up of these bizarre phrases...whut up brah? you down fo dat? and then someone might turn to me for input, I say something in normal English with fully articulated words and they just look at me like they can't comprehend what I've said. It makes me feel like screaming, and shoving a dictionary in people's faces.