Do Your Parents Prefer You to be a Terrible Person?

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I am undiagnosed, and my parents prefer to think that I am simply a terrible person, rather than contemplate that I might be ND.

Times when I have not realised that people are upset cause my parents to tell me I'm 'heartless' and 'uncaring' and 'selfish'; times when I have not known how to interact with people, so have not talked to them cause my parents to say that I 'think [I] am superior to everybody' and that I am rude; times when I have misinterpreted their non-obvious questions as statements and have not answered cause them to call me 'passive-aggressive' and 'lazy' and 'acting stupid'. They tell me these things all the time. If I protest that I really did not know what to do/say etc. they say that I'm lying.

When I have (once) approached them with my suspicions about ASD, both parents have shouted at me, saying that I'm not like that, and suggesting that I stop playing dumb. This is after they kept me down in preschool for lack of social skills.

Did/do you have similar experiences? Did/do your parents persist in the belief that you were normal but badly behaved/rude? Do you have any suggestions as to what I can do about it?

My parents don't think I'm terrible. They usually have good and positive things to say about me. I feel like sometimes I'm the only person here whose parents do.

My mom and my sister both want me to be a bad person because I am not female. They both believe that all men, Aspie or not, are stupid, self-centered pigs who think more with our genitals than with the brain!

Mine never wanted me to be terrible. In fact they wanted me to be normal so they gave me a normal childhood and made me feel normal. But unfortunately that couldn't be avoided elsewhere, not with my school and other kids.

Not sure which poll option to choose.

I don't think my dad considers me a terrible person now or ever. He also doesn't seem to care what I am dx'd with one way or another. He's supportive, I guess. He's never been jerky to me.

My mother, on the other hand, is a different story. She's called me a lot of not so nice things over the years. Not sure if it's an autism thing for me though... my mom is an addict and was not even close to okay when I was growing up, so any flaw with me she takes personal and then turns it back around on me to try to act like she's a victim or saint. She did say at one point though how glad she was I had a dx so that they could give me a pill to finally fix me. Other times she says I do not have autism and it's all in my head and I need to quit thinking about myself so much. She's an odd one... drugs and booze will do that to ya...

My parents thought I was a perfectly normal but intentionally difficult child.

Sort of, but not my parents exactly. It was my grandmother who raised me, and she does believe in the diagnosis, but only as far as things like stimming and harmless awkwardness go. She refuses to believe any rudeness on my part is unintentional. She was always yelling at me over something I said or did (not that she'd ever tell me what I did wrong) and often tells me I'm "hateful" and "a bully." Whenever I apologize and ask her to help me understand what went wrong, she accuses me of hiding behind my diagnosis and using it as an excuse to be a lazy jerk and avoid self-improvement. I've learned to just apologize for being deliberately hurtful and promise to try and control my sadistic impulses in the future.

3 years ago my mom decided that my problems must be caused by my atitude, not my disabilities. It didn't help that this was a time when my anxiety was so bad that I could barely get myself to go to school and I myself didn't know much about my disabilities. It was very frustrating for me, I tried as hard as I could yet was told that I was being lazy and I didn't really know what was wrong with me. it was by far the worst few months of my life. Since then she has become more understanding and I have learned more as well, my anxiety has also gotten significantly better.

Thank you all for taking the time to cast votes and reply. It makes me happy . To those who had/have similar experiences to me, I'm sorry to hear that it is a more general problem than just my family. To those whose relatives are supportive and understanding, I'm happy for you!

No. My parents think my AS makes me a good person. I like to think the same way, but sometimes I give myself way less credit than I should.