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beelzemutt
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11 Dec 2016, 10:26 pm

Sorry for seeming rude or angry. Nobody helps I haven't had any friends EVER I can't talk (I'm diagnosed with selective mutism but they won't f*****g bother helping me or testing for autism) I'll delete this later I just have nowhere to share my feelings and even now I feel hesistant to



slave
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12 Dec 2016, 12:01 am

You have every right to feel upset.

You need help, as you said, and no one is helping. That sucks!

If you tell us what nation u live in, perhaps we could help u find help. :D

I will try to help u if i am able and i know others here would as well. :D



ZombieBrideXD
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12 Dec 2016, 12:47 am

f**k people.

People started the holocaust

People suck, i dont care, progeria, cancer, downs syndrome, autism, cerebral palsy, theyre all as*holes.

Thats why i live with dogs. Dogs are nice. Even when theyre dicks, theyre still nice.


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Misery
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12 Dec 2016, 12:54 am

You've come to the right place at least. You can find friends here and people to talk to. Alot of us are helpful, and many have been through what you are going through. You can ask for help on here or just find people to chat with.

The forum can be a bit slow/dull at times (because people can only post so often, it's a forum after all) but it's still a good place to seek these things out.



That being said, I tend to agree with you that people in general tend to suck. I usually just hate them all by default. Normal society is just full of jerks.



wrongcitizen
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12 Dec 2016, 3:11 am

tldr at bottom

I'm often very bothered by the extreme stupidity and lag of other people. However, always try to avoid narcissism as it is the only condition of the human mind that will allow you to be both a genius and an idiot at the same time.
Anyways, to respond to your statement, I am sick of them as well. Sometimes I want to find who I truly am on an interior level because I've lost it through so many years of "faking" or "regulating" myself, and I find that rather disgusting. I often try to seek who I was by looking at things that make me happy and seeing if they are superimposed over a fictional archetypal personality or if they are truly representative of my interior desire and motive. Hopefully one day we can live in a world where these little social rules that are found in neurotypical conversation will be removed, so humanity can progress at a peaceful and purer level, and that everyone will be allowed equal social opportunity.

Much of my life I've spent alone. I have a difficulty getting with people. It's not finding friends, just staying with them, and I think you'll find yourself in a much similar scenario. The difficulty in maintaining a relationship with actual meaning is very noticeable for people like us as we lack the ability to see the fake social boundaries as "real" and we see beyond the weaknesses of others, but this strength turns into a weakness of our own.

Sorry about the length of that, I just wanted to say I agree but 1 friend seems to do the trick well.



neurotypicalET
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12 Dec 2016, 7:55 am

I know it's difficult... But can you try asking your parents if maybe they can have you diagnosed for ASD because you seem very convinced about it, and I would imagine for a very good reason....because your still within the diagnosable window for ASD...it will really help you a lot right now....unlike in adulthood when diagnosis will be very difficult....and to be honest not that much of value... :D


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Dear_one
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13 Dec 2016, 3:01 pm

"I love humanity - it's the people I can't stand." You are in a tricky situation. Kids who have had little support usually make life hard for even the best foster parents until they learn to trust. We often have unrealistic expectations of a friendship, hoping for an all-in-one. Most friends will only be able to relate to you about a shared interest or two, but that is a start, and you can keep looking for someone interested in other aspects.



Kitty4670
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13 Dec 2016, 4:05 pm

Welcome to the WP family, you come to the right place, we are here to help. Everyone here went through the same thing & we can understand each other, so you are not alone.



W91T
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13 Dec 2016, 4:16 pm

wrongcitizen wrote:
tldr at bottom

I'm often very bothered by the extreme stupidity and lag of other people. However, always try to avoid narcissism as it is the only condition of the human mind that will allow you to be both a genius and an idiot at the same time.
Anyways, to respond to your statement, I am sick of them as well. Sometimes I want to find who I truly am on an interior level because I've lost it through so many years of "faking" or "regulating" myself, and I find that rather disgusting. I often try to seek who I was by looking at things that make me happy and seeing if they are superimposed over a fictional archetypal personality or if they are truly representative of my interior desire and motive. Hopefully one day we can live in a world where these little social rules that are found in neurotypical conversation will be removed, so humanity can progress at a peaceful and purer level, and that everyone will be allowed equal social opportunity.

Much of my life I've spent alone. I have a difficulty getting with people. It's not finding friends, just staying with them, and I think you'll find yourself in a much similar scenario. The difficulty in maintaining a relationship with actual meaning is very noticeable for people like us as we lack the ability to see the fake social boundaries as "real" and we see beyond the weaknesses of others, but this strength turns into a weakness of our own.

Sorry about the length of that, I just wanted to say I agree but 1 friend seems to do the trick well.


Feel exactly the same. I hate how I have to smile when I don't feel like it and fake my voice.



Noca
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13 Dec 2016, 4:19 pm

Welcome to WP. Please stick around to find you are surrounded with lots of people in the same boat as you. Let us know where you are from as another poster mentioned above and we can try and help you navigate whatever system there is what country/state/province you live to help you get assessed for ASD.



schopenhauer with a keyboard
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13 Dec 2016, 5:36 pm

i was in your exact position at your age.
6 years later, and....





i'm completely f'ed and have been isolated and forgotten about the entire time.
maybe if you get help you can get through it though. i hope so because nobody deserves this.



Dear_one
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13 Dec 2016, 9:35 pm

The other half of this is that everybody else thinks you are ignoring them. You can get started on finding a friend just by asking people how they are, and tacking on a few more questions. It helps a lot if you are talking to someone with a mutual interest. Smiling at them helps, too. If you live where people wave at each other a lot, you don't have to know someone to get a wave and smile back.



beelzemutt
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15 Dec 2016, 6:20 pm

I want to thank everybody for being supportive I'll keep visiting this website and I live in Canada I'll go set my location and everything now. It's hard to make friends when I can't even talk to anybody other than my mother and when I am able to write to somebody I just block them out and I have trouble interacting my highschool keeps sending behavioral problem notes and IEP crap which does nothing but make my parents pissed off, my parents sadly don't care/want to bother with helping me. I hope we all get some good days. Christmas is coming up soon and my family does not celebrate anything so I'll be happy for others who get to celebrate! Merry early Christmas



Raleigh
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15 Dec 2016, 6:23 pm

People are beautiful.


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beelzemutt
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15 Dec 2016, 6:39 pm

schopenhauer with a keyboard wrote:
i was in your exact position at your age.
6 years later, and....





i'm completely f'ed and have been isolated and forgotten about the entire time.
maybe if you get help you can get through it though. i hope so because nobody deserves this.


I want help so badly, I see people everyday as I'm still in school and it makes me sick I actually need breaks 10 times a day so I don't throw up or break down it's not just fear it's some odd feeling of not belonging and a feeling I get near only people I can't directly look at peoples faces and I'm always trying to block my sight with hats and s**t even though I get in trouble for wearing them. I went to a mental hospital recently they didn't bother to get to know me before saying there wasn't anybody willing to work with a loser like me who doesn't talk and I just wanted to run out and get hit by a car ( I've been in this process a lot of times and rejection now is like a punch in already gaping wound ) anyway point being I want help but it's probably not gonna happen and I'm stuck. Hope things get better for you, nobody deserves this. I'd chat with you if I could but I find it hard to even online.



wrongcitizen
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18 Dec 2016, 4:16 am

beelzemutt wrote:
schopenhauer with a keyboard wrote:
i was in your exact position at your age.
6 years later, and....





i'm completely f'ed and have been isolated and forgotten about the entire time.
maybe if you get help you can get through it though. i hope so because nobody deserves this.


I want help so badly, I see people everyday as I'm still in school and it makes me sick I actually need breaks 10 times a day so I don't throw up or break down it's not just fear it's some odd feeling of not belonging and a feeling I get near only people I can't directly look at peoples faces and I'm always trying to block my sight with hats and s**t even though I get in trouble for wearing them. I went to a mental hospital recently they didn't bother to get to know me before saying there wasn't anybody willing to work with a loser like me who doesn't talk and I just wanted to run out and get hit by a car ( I've been in this process a lot of times and rejection now is like a punch in already gaping wound ) anyway point being I want help but it's probably not gonna happen and I'm stuck. Hope things get better for you, nobody deserves this. I'd chat with you if I could but I find it hard to even online.


I sincerely hope that what I'm about to say doesn't repulse you but listen: You DO NOT want to die, EVER. The whole purpose of life is the small things, and when you are depressed or unhappy your brain begins to alienate what you find most grounding, and sets you off into a turbulent deepness of thought which you find alien and unwelcoming. Also, you have to realize that it is not yours, or in essence OUR fault, but it is the rigidity and the confusion of society which is unwilling to yield to us and our abilities simply due to fear. Most of human progress has been made by people in our position, those with "difficulties", but these cowardly people have us contribute to THEIR world, then discard us once we've contributed what THEY think is our utmost capability. You and I are both capable of many things, and perhaps you can use your emotional reaction to the situation you're in to fuel some sort of progress, something that will help ground you, like music or arts, something that can be just YOURS and something that isn't mandated by society.