I'm Not An Aspie. I Lied During My Assessment.

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If you're unsure about you're diagnosis I suggest go to a Aspie meetup and observe talk and listen to as many of them as possible over a long period of time. Each and everyone of us on the spectrum are different. Some are lower functioning others are higher functioning. I've been going to two different meetups for years. One arranged by the "municipality" (is that the right word in english? I used google translate). There I typically meet the lower functioning cases, still some higher functioning individuals drop by from time to time but they seldom comes back. The other meetup is arranged by Aspies themselves. At this one there are more higher functioning people, they have to be of course to manage to arrange something like that and keep doing it over time. Most of the people in both groups clearly are on the spectrum but just at opposite ends of it.

After being diagnosed myself many years ago I too was very unsure if the diagnosis was correct and if I had correctly and honestly answered all the questions and tests. I can just trust that the professionals that diagnosed me knew what they where doing and where able to spot any attempts by me consciously or unconsciously exaggerating some of the questions. I really don't know if I was honest or not. I also have social phobia and that might have influenced the tests somehow.

To this day I still question my diagnosis. But what I have discovered is that I mainly only get along with Aspies and I feel at home in the Aspie community and they accept me back as one of their own. I have met a lot of Aspies trough the years and many of them are very much like me, higher functioning cases. Some of them seem as unsure of their diagnoses as me. Others I just KNOW are on the spectrum because of certain obvious traits, but in most cases you could not notice the traits without knowing them well, and nobody on the street would know by looking or talking to them. It's a spectrum.

And by the way, I'm terrible at math, coding and music and seeing patterns and stuff like that. I'm descent at art stuff but by no means very good, I'm just creative with a good imagination and I'm stubborn, in time I can make stuff that is okay. I'm really bad at drawing realistically, I can't do that. I am obsessive though about my hobby's, but that might just mean that I'm a Nerd.

I didn't deliberately lie; what I said sort of popped out. The thing is, other than what the psychologist noted, I don't possess any of the quirks that Aspies are supposed to possess. I'm not interested in a subject/hobby, to the point of being anal. I'm not a maths genius. I don't fall into the three sub-sets of thinking, as prescribed by Temple Gradin, into which all Aspies. I'm not a visual thinker, a verbal/logic thinker, or a maths/musical thinker.

Given that Dr. Grandin is an expert, then if people, supposedly diagnosed as being autistic, don't fit into those three sub-sets, then how can we be autistic? If I'm not a systemiser, (my home is organised chaos - I finally got round to cleaning the bathroom sink, today, weeks after it last been cleaned), how can I be autistic? I guess I might have a problem with executive function, but lots of people put off things, or are disorganised.

I don't have perfect pitch, inasmuch as I can't tell which note is being played, as I don't read music, nor do I play a musical instrument. Admittedly, I can get obsessed with people; there is someone I like, who is way younger than me and I asked that person, if we could be FB friends. This person also said they would accept my Instrgram request, but I blocked the person concerned.

The psychologist who saw me for a follow-up questionnaire said that I had a problem with abstract thinking and central coherence. But based on what I've read: that aspies are: logical; good at systemising; have deep interests, (I get easily bored); good at maths/art/music/writing, and; can't read facial emotions, then the lie that I told, means that I've been wrongly diagnosed.

Maybe, if the psychologist had done her job properly and had given me tests, as well as interview me, then she might have said that I'm not autistic. She didn't ask me to take the Asperger's Quiz, the EQ, or the SQ tests. She just blathered on.

When I did some baseline tests for the Austism Research Centre, and I rang for some feedback, I was told that the tests indicated I might be an aspie; one of the tests was to look for patterns - I just guessed, (which means it might be easy to lie on the AQ Test), as I didn't know where the patterns were.

How can anyone be truly an aspie, if they don't have limited interests, aren't good at anything, (just bog standard), ans they don't systemise? I know I can't be.

Ok, you are not an aspie.

What do you want from this thread at this stage?

To the OP:

If you are that unsure about your diagnosis and you think the psychologist did not to due diligence, then the best thing to do is to get re-assessed by someone else. It's the only way you can know for sure.

Autism is a spectrum, meaning we can have a variety of traits at varying levels of severity. You seem to be focusing on a few traits that you think every autistic person must have. Not every autistic person is a STEM super genius or incredible organizer or has perfect pitch (which I didn't even know or think to be an autistic thing). If you're a woman, traits can manifest differently than in male aspies. If you're dissatisfied with your current diagnosis, seeking a second opinion could be a helpful option.

Are you at all inattentive? Inattentive ADD is a lot like autism.

@Black Cat: huh?
@Keladry: I can't really have a second assessment, as my Dad is dead, my Mum's in a care home and I no longer speak to my brother. I know that to be properly assessed, a family member has to be inerviewed, (I contacted the Leeds Austism Service and was informed of this). When I spoke to someone at the services, the person told me that she had no reason to believe I wasn't autistic.

I'm of the belief that there should be list of traits, that people should have to be diagnosed has having aspergers. The list would include: being good at maths/music/art/writing; not able to read people's emotions; not able to hold eye contact; must be a good systemiser; must be a visual/verbal/maths/music thinker; must have meltdowns; have a special interest, which is all consuming; have overloads of all the senses, (not just one), and; speak loudly/softly/quickly/monotone. If the traits couldn't be ticked off, then a person wouldn't be considered an aspie. It's a pity that there isn't a blood test for autism.

Almost all of your examples are wrong. The answer to almost all of them is that it's a question of degree, certain things are learnt through practice, we are just slower at them than NTs, most people have some traits but not all.

Your list would exclude a huge number of autistics that are clearly autistic enough to be impaired.

I agree with underwater here.

OP, you sound a bit like I felt some years after I was diagnosed, I highly recommend going to some meetups. That helped me a lot to realize it was a spectrum.

But I lied, during my assessment. Two psychologists have said that I'm on the spectrum. I can tick off most of the traits associated with female aspies, but the fact I told a lie, is bugging me.

But was it really a lie? I mean, did you already have a different, simple and true answer but decided to tell something else?
Or maybe you just have very high standards for honesty and going with not-absolutely-precise, or sometimes even random because of confusion, answers is equivalent to a lie for you?

I agree with Magz here. She makes a good point. I had a similar thing when I read the report from my psychologist who diagnosed me, where it seemed some of the information was not 100% accurate to my degree of precision. I did not lie or try to mislead, but somehow it got communicated inaccurately. After thinking about it and discussing it with my therapist, really the points are very minor and inconsequential. Meaning that the psychologist did not make the diagnosis off of one or two specific things that I said, but really rather was looking at the big picture which was a combination of things I said, results from diagnostics, and her own observations. The big picture is something that is much harder for aspies to see. I too got caught up in the details of those specific statements and it plays on my mind too - does this mean that my diagnosis is wrong? Or, I don't meet X trait, etc. so it's wrong. But that's just us focusing too much on the details and not the bigger picture.

Unless you were intentionally lying on every question, I wouldn't question the bigger picture viewpoint of the person who diagnosed you. One or two small inaccuracies is not going to change that at all.

This brings up a question that I wasn't going to bring up:

The people at PPR are convincing me that I can't tell an Asperger's person from an NT. Supposedly many, most or all of those people were diagnosed Aspergers's, but they could have fooled me!

Though I'm not into politics, you can observe rampant NT sheep-like herd-behavior in the political posts.

In philosophy-discussion, one can observe the usual typical NT aggressive arrogance there. ...including people whose signature says that they're diagnosed Asperger's or Autism.

If those are Asperger's people, then I admit that I can't tell an Asperger's from an NT.

Michael829

@Magz: I over exaggerated. I knew that aspies can be rude/offend people with things they say. I've only offended people a couple of times, (when I was at primary school, on one occasion I was talking to a teacher, after school had ended and I said something and she told me off for being sarcastic).

I'm overly polite and can honestly say, that, in the 20-odd years, since asking a lecturer, if she thought about wearing make-up, I've never said something that has offended anyone. I might have said things, to people, that I worry about afterwards, but not things that might offend.

I did ask someone, that works, for one of my clients, if she was South African, (as over the phone she sounded as if she came from South Africa), and I was worried that I had offended her.

The problem is, I don't possess any traits, such as being a systemiser, good at a particular subject, etc, that ever other aspie has. If I'm supposedly an aspie, why don't I fit in with one of the three groups of thinkers? Why don't I have a special interest? Why am I able to read people's emotions? Why did I change my Asperger's Quiz questions, so I would have more ND traits, than NT traits, (originally, both sets of traits were equal)? Why can't I guess correctly which pattern comes next in a sequence?

There is a sticky in the Women's Forum with lots of reference resources for women who are or might be on the spectrum.


Women Specific

The Pattern of Abilities and Development of Girls with Asperger Syndrome by Tony Attwood –
http://www.tonyattwood.com.au/index.php ... Itemid=181

Asperger Syndrome in Women: A Different Set of Challenges? By Catherine Faherty -
http://www.autismtoday.com/articles/Asp ... _Women.htm

An Aspie in the City by Carlin Flora -
http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles ... n-the-city
http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles ... ity?page=2
http://www.psychologytoday.com/articles ... ity?page=3

So, you sometimes offend people not meaning to and have to be careful not to do it. +1 to aspiness.


You are just systemising. Anyway, what are they? I don't know about it.


Your special interest is overthinking your behaviors and the feelings of other people, IMO.


You learned. By <see above>


Are you confused by the lack of precision in the questions, maybe?


It's not your superpower.

It's okay, it seems you are the camoufleged "female-type" aspie. Exaggerating one answer is nothing close to lying. But your black-and-white, all-or-nothing thinking is clearly hinting you are on the right planet here