How do people act when they think you're autistic/awkward?

Page 1 of 1 [ 12 posts ] 

DevilKisses
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Jul 2010
Age: 25
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,067
Location: Canada

01 Apr 2017, 12:41 am

When I'm having an awkward/bad hair day I notice people approach me more. I always push those people away. Here's my reason why.
Imagine I'm a straight guy who fooled around with another guy once. If a girl approaches me in a suspiciously friendly way and she knows I fooled around with guys I'll assume she wants a gay best friend. Instead of showing genuine interest in me as a potential boyfriend or at least a friend. I feel the same about people approaching me when they think I'm awkward or quirky. They don't see me as a real equal or friend. They just see my behavior as entertaining instead of actually seeing me.


_________________
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 82 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 124 of 200
You are very likely neurotypical


Xardas
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 26 Oct 2016
Gender: Male
Posts: 70

01 Apr 2017, 9:29 am

DevilKisses wrote:
When I'm having an awkward/bad hair day I notice people approach me more.


Some people like "fancy" and "messy" hairstyles, some don't pay attention to hair. Correlation is not always causation. I doubt that they approach you more because of "this hair" or "that hair". Most people don't focus on hair. Maybe it is your impression because you are preoccupied with thinking about hair when you have a "bad hair day"?

Maybe you are worried about having "bad hair", and associate it with peoples' reactions?

DevilKisses wrote:
I always push those people away. Here's my reason why.
Imagine I'm a straight guy who fooled around with another guy once. If a girl approaches me in a suspiciously friendly way and she knows I fooled around with guys I'll assume she wants a gay best friend. Instead of showing genuine interest in me as a potential boyfriend or at least a friend. I feel the same about people approaching me when they think I'm awkward or quirky. They don't see me as a real equal or friend.


In my opinion, you are probably making wrong assumptions about what people want.

DevilKisses wrote:
They just see my behavior as entertaining instead of actually seeing me.


I disagree. Awkward behavior is not really entertaining, so I doubt that they see it as such. Quirky behavior is entertaining, but if they see you as quirky (definition of quirky: "unusual in an attractive and interesting way"), then it means that they are genuinely interested in you, and not just in your behavior. So they are seeing you.

Quriky people are seen as attractive and interesting, because this is the very definition of quirky. And if someone is unusual in an unattractive and boring way, then we will not call such people quirky.



idonthaveanickname
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 5 Feb 2014
Age: 41
Gender: Female
Posts: 163
Location: Chicago, IL

01 Apr 2017, 1:50 pm

People just look at me like I'm from another planet, like "What the hell's wrong with you?" But you know what? I don't care what they think because that's on them.



ASPartOfMe
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 25 Aug 2013
Age: 64
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,849
Location: Long Island, New York

01 Apr 2017, 2:56 pm

Bully me, talk to other people as if I am not there


_________________
Professionally Identified and joined WP August 26, 2013
DSM 5: Autism Spectrum Disorder, DSM IV: Aspergers Moderate Severity

“My autism is not a superpower. It also isn’t some kind of god-forsaken, endless fountain of suffering inflicted on my family. It’s just part of who I am as a person”. - Sara Luterman


antnego
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 22 Mar 2017
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 134

01 Apr 2017, 3:02 pm

DevilKisses wrote:
When I'm having an awkward/bad hair day I notice people approach me more. I always push those people away. Here's my reason why.
Imagine I'm a straight guy who fooled around with another guy once. If a girl approaches me in a suspiciously friendly way and she knows I fooled around with guys I'll assume she wants a gay best friend. Instead of showing genuine interest in me as a potential boyfriend or at least a friend. I feel the same about people approaching me when they think I'm awkward or quirky. They don't see me as a real equal or friend. They just see my behavior as entertaining instead of actually seeing me.


That's a whole lot of assumptions with little to no proof.

If your brain is wired like mine, then you're probably prone to negative thinking and assume the worst. That's something to be aware of. I can be my own worst enemy if I get stuck in stinking thinking.


_________________
My neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 155 of 200

My neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 82 of 200

I am very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)


antnego
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 22 Mar 2017
Age: 42
Gender: Male
Posts: 134

01 Apr 2017, 3:04 pm

People who continuously doubt themselves or beat themselves up are more likely to project as depressed, creepy, desperate or awkward. But most people could care less how you look, because they're too wrapped up in their own lives to bother.


_________________
My neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 155 of 200

My neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 82 of 200

I am very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)


Xardas
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker

User avatar

Joined: 26 Oct 2016
Gender: Male
Posts: 70

01 Apr 2017, 4:02 pm

antnego wrote:
DevilKisses wrote:
When I'm having an awkward/bad hair day I notice people approach me more. I always push those people away. Here's my reason why.
Imagine I'm a straight guy who fooled around with another guy once. If a girl approaches me in a suspiciously friendly way and she knows I fooled around with guys I'll assume she wants a gay best friend. Instead of showing genuine interest in me as a potential boyfriend or at least a friend. I feel the same about people approaching me when they think I'm awkward or quirky. They don't see me as a real equal or friend. They just see my behavior as entertaining instead of actually seeing me.


That's a whole lot of assumptions with little to no proof.

If your brain is wired like mine, then you're probably prone to negative thinking and assume the worst. That's something to be aware of. I can be my own worst enemy if I get stuck in stinking thinking.


This! :hail: People, try to think more positively!



CockneyRebel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 47
Gender: Male
Posts: 105,223
Location: In a quiet and peaceful garden, where Mick Avory-like Sweet Peas grow

02 Apr 2017, 5:34 pm

I don't care one way or the other. I do the things that make me happy and if they act strange around me, that's their problem.


_________________
Peabody

Om Nom 2024

viewtopic.php?f=11&t=26&start=645


EclecticWarrior
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Nov 2016
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,001
Location: Cool places

02 Apr 2017, 5:56 pm

It depends. I've had people realise I'm "vulnerable" and start picking on me. At least once someone's run away from me. Fortunately, most people are okay with it.


_________________
~Zinc Alloy aka. Russell~

WP's most sparkling member.

DX classic autism 1995, AS 2003, depression 2008

~INFP~


Edna3362
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 29 Oct 2011
Gender: Female
Posts: 9,490
Location: ᜆᜄᜎᜓᜄ᜔

02 Apr 2017, 7:59 pm

According to my own experiences and experiences with the culture from where I live:

If people thinks I'm awkward, first things they'd assume has anything to do with shyness and naivety.
If not, they'd assume I'm someone from another ethnic group or 'tribe' who just happened to be a bit out of place, but no surprise from anyone else.
Said other tribe DO have odd accent, wording, body language, and such which covers up autistic related oddities that has anything to do with voice, speech, nonverbal and verbal ability. It helps that my own mom IS from another 'tribe' and inherit her physical features. :lol: Hence I do not worry about 'passing' or even try. I'm merely taking advantages of norm's assumptions.

If people thinks I'm autistic, that varies.
Strangers would probably leave me alone. Or avoid me. Or get curious enough to ask me. Regardless, I could care less as long as they're not bothering me and I don't have to bother them.
If they knew me enough, they'd under- or over-estimate my abilities, maturity, experiences, and several expectations. :x
Some would assume I'm on high sugar on certain moods or ate something, some simply think I'm just on some cycle or some sort. But none of them considers several factors why I would think or act like as I do simply because they'd assume I operate the same way as they do. :roll:


_________________
Gained Number Post Count (1).
Lose Time (n).


ZombieBrideXD
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 26 Jan 2013
Age: 24
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,507
Location: Canada

03 Apr 2017, 2:35 am

Its not something that ever occurs to me... I dont really know.. They would have to be pretty blunt and people need to tell me how they feel or else ill just assume they have no feelings. If im being awkward/ autistic (which im always autistic?) Mostly i just get "Emily, thats Innaproriate you cant say that!" Or " shhhh emily, not here! Your being too loud!" Things like that. Is that what you mean?

I do know ONE subtle thing. Sometimes if i say something that might make another person uncomfortable , the person/people im talking too will go "ehehh......yeah......" And be really quiet. I know thats a bad thing.


_________________
Obsessing over Sonic the Hedgehog since 2009
Diagnosed with Aspergers' syndrome in 2012.
Diagnosed with Autism Spectrum Disorder Level 1 severity without intellectual disability and without language impairment in 2015.

DA: http://mephilesdark123.deviantart.com

Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 170 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 43 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)


AnushkaB
Hummingbird
Hummingbird

Joined: 12 Jun 2017
Gender: Female
Posts: 24

18 Oct 2017, 8:37 am

Xardas wrote:
DevilKisses wrote:
When I'm having an awkward/bad hair day I notice people approach me more.


Some people like "fancy" and "messy" hairstyles, some don't pay attention to hair. Correlation is not always causation. I doubt that they approach you more because of "this hair" or "that hair". Most people don't focus on hair. Maybe it is your impression because you are preoccupied with thinking about hair when you have a "bad hair day"?

Maybe you are worried about having "bad hair", and associate it with peoples' reactions?


Bad hair day is an idiom. It is not actually about hairstyles.