Do you feel like you make people uncomfortable...

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hellhole
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01 Nov 2017, 7:30 pm

... with your presence?

It doesn't apply to all people, but I have noticed that when I'm around certain people they seem to be a bit 'put off' by me, which they show in their facial expression, that's usually sort of scrunched up when they're looking at me.

Apparently I look fine, so I don't think it's that; I think it's the subtle, yet slightly awkward quirks that I have that make people uneasy around me. Or, it could be due to the fact that I'm quite shy/reserved; if you've ever been around someone like that you'll know what I mean by making them uncomfortable.

...


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01 Nov 2017, 9:50 pm

That's pretty observant on your part. I try to be low-key and put people at ease and it works with some people, but not infrequently I'll suddenly notice signals that the other person is uncomfortable, like crossed arms or terse replies to friendly chit-chat or looking off into the distance. I think I may sometimes not be displaying the right non-verbal communication in terms of posture or eye motions or possibly tone of voice, but it's hard to know.



HighLlama
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02 Nov 2017, 3:48 am

People tend to cross their arms. They stay friendly in tone and facial expression, but take a defensive stance. I think to them it looks like I stare.



EzraS
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02 Nov 2017, 5:28 am

I'm the kinda misfit people cross the street to avoid.



hellhole
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02 Nov 2017, 7:59 am

EzraS wrote:
I'm the kinda misfit people cross the street to avoid.

Same. I'm also I'm same sort of guy that kids walk up to when I'm standing somewhere by myself, then stare at me with that awe-stricken look in their eyes, only for their parents to give me a dirty look then pull them away from me...
:?


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Last edited by hellhole on 02 Nov 2017, 8:02 am, edited 1 time in total.

Masakados
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02 Nov 2017, 8:13 am

I know I make people uncomfortable because I've been told.
Most people make me uncomfortable though so it's a mutual feeling.



EzraS
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02 Nov 2017, 8:27 am

hellhole wrote:
EzraS wrote:
I'm the kinda misfit people cross the street to avoid.

Same. I'm also I'm same sort of guy that kids walk up to when I'm standing somewhere by myself, then stare at me with that awe-stricken look in their eyes, only for their parents to give me a dirty look then pull them away from me...
:?


Holy s**t we must be twins.



underwater
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02 Nov 2017, 9:54 am

EzraS wrote:
hellhole wrote:
EzraS wrote:
I'm the kinda misfit people cross the street to avoid.

Same. I'm also I'm same sort of guy that kids walk up to when I'm standing somewhere by myself, then stare at me with that awe-stricken look in their eyes, only for their parents to give me a dirty look then pull them away from me...
:?


Holy s**t we must be twins.


Same here. Small kids are extremely interested in me, and their parents give me ugly looks and pull their kids away.

I'm better at analyzing social interaction than actually showing the 'right' sort of facial expression, I think. I often catch people acting strange around me, and in those cases I can often feel that my face is sort of 'frozen' - I can't for the life of me come up with an appropriate expression.


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elbowgrease
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02 Nov 2017, 10:05 am

I'm kind of on both sides of it. I make some people uncomfortable, but other people seem to be very comfortable with me. I've been told I look mad a lot. Also that I'm really instense. For the most part, people won't talk to me, or usually even look at me. Which I'm basically ok with. For the most part I don't want to talk to anyone.
On another hand, sometimes people are really comfortable with me. Will come up and just start talking to me, sometimes I get trapped and can't get out of the conversation. And I've had two incidents recently in which people have told me something they've never told anyone else in their life.



CharlesRooster
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02 Nov 2017, 11:32 am

I feel like I do because the very few conversations I have with people have them responding with brief responses and moments of awkward pausing with blank facial expressions, usually I break it off at that point b/c why bother?


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raw83472
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02 Nov 2017, 12:39 pm

hellhole wrote:
EzraS wrote:
I'm the kinda misfit people cross the street to avoid.

Same. I'm also I'm same sort of guy that kids walk up to when I'm standing somewhere by myself, then stare at me with that awe-stricken look in their eyes, only for their parents to give me a dirty look then pull them away from me...
:?



Do you dress like SpongeBob or something?



raw83472
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02 Nov 2017, 12:43 pm

No, because they usually quickly realize i'm offbeat and they see that I'm friendly so... I was always the type of person that can be friends with anyone (for better or worse)... but I think people realize I can't do the eye contact thing, and they see that it is because i'm monoprocessing (they realize I'm not making eye contact because I'm thinking), and I'm not really anti-social (once I'm talking to someone) so they quite quickly realize that I'm friendly (even though I'm not doing the normal eye contact thing). I also dress completely normal, so in that regard I don't appear "different" and so people don't realize I'm offbeat until they get to know me a bit. I never understood why people always had to "dress different than the rest" (i.e. goth look)...



hellhole
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03 Nov 2017, 10:17 am

raw83472 wrote:
Do you dress like SpongeBob or something?


No it'd likely just that lost and/or 'evil' look I have in my eyes all the time.


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03 Nov 2017, 10:29 am

hellhole wrote:
EzraS wrote:
I'm the kinda misfit people cross the street to avoid.

Same. I'm also I'm same sort of guy that kids walk up to when I'm standing somewhere by myself, then stare at me with that awe-stricken look in their eyes, only for their parents to give me a dirty look then pull them away from me...
:?
I'm the kinda person people stare at in public. [/color]


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