Too sensitive to noise, im too frustaded with my father

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foxant
Snowy Owl
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31 Jan 2018, 2:57 pm

my room is in the center of the house. the walls are very thin. the living room is in front of my room. my father insists to watch a old CRT tv from philips, 20 inches. i have several problems with it. i tried to explain with him about my autism and how the filter of my brain works, and that any noise can distract me. he always just walk away from me without saying nothing. thats so cold! i try to encage a conversation with him to explain how is to live with my problem and he dont give a single f**k!
My problem is, i get too easily distracted with noise. that tv, a old crt, has that buzzing noise, that i can hear from like 15 metters away. so it get me insane. i tried several times to just change the tv location cause its torture to me. its simple, just change from living room, to the dormitory, and then see tv with the doors closed. problem solved! but he dont want it. and we have this talk almost every day for almost 2 years at least. in the dormitory, we have one of those modern hd tvs with LED! better colors, contrast, everything. and in tv theres the same channels he watch on the living room and he dont want it. omg, i cant bare this anymore.

when hes on living room often the put the tv loud enough to enter my room, and i have to ask him several times at day to lower the volume. also he has the habit to talk or play with my old dog(that dont even bark anymore, thank god) and it distract me as well.

i know, i sound selfish, its his life, he pay my bills, hes like the master of the house. but no no no, it still annoys me. i feel extremely frustaded because he putted a son with mental problems in the world and refuses to understand a little bit. its so selfish. and yeah, i use muffers, even then i can still hear the buzzing of the tv thanks to the thin walls.

when we have visit, the visit watch tv in the dormitory, and i cant hear a single word or sound from tv.

what you guys think? theres possible a solution to this? how can i convince such a stubborn person to change a years habit of watching tv in the same spot. he would literally change my life if he did that. when he power on the tv, all i can do is torture my self listening loud music(to try to isolate me from the noise) and play videogames with loud noise, until he power of the tv. then i can back to studies, reading and more produtive things.
that s**t is ruining my life. :cry: im so frustaded. i can only do things at night or dawn when hes sleeping. or in the morning(that he dont watch tv) but from 1pm to 10pm at any minute he can power on the tv.

sorry for you have to read such a weirdo wall of text. im almost sure that this over sensitive to sound is thing with the minority of this forum. most of autists probably only have problems with relationships more than this kind of thing.


_________________
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 152 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 55 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)

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jadix
Tufted Titmouse
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31 Jan 2018, 5:03 pm

I have issues with sound, there is nothing I hate worse than being stuck somewhere that is too loud and/or crowded/bright and feeling trapped. I find I get irritable when I am overloaded, and also cannot focus. I am sorry your father talks to you that way. It's not a lot of solace, but there are many people out there that are nicer, and those who are mean commonly result from other cruelty in their lives. I wouldn't take it personal, I know that's easier said than done with a parent, but if you are respectfully asking him to be considerate and he is swearing, you're not the one causing the problem. Personally for me, I try to be as objective as I can with parents, you can't make them care or love you, that doesn't mean you shouldn't be loved. all you can do is love unconditionally, and try to get your own space and keep yourself protected. I really recommend sound cancelling head phones with ear plugs underneath, I am going to school myself, and very grateful I don't live in a dorm, lol. Also if you have a restaurant with wifi near by you could try to do your homework there, your headphones should cancel out the talking, and if you are like me and don't like crowds try for a time or location that isn't crowded. Good luck



jadix
Tufted Titmouse
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31 Jan 2018, 5:16 pm

I'm sorry I misread your post, he doesn't give a * was a description. Have you asked him why he ignores you? That fact that he disregards it, sounds hostile, but maybe you could reach him. I am just throwing out ideas, good luck. :-)



BitterCoffee
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31 Jan 2018, 6:28 pm

Maybe start doing little things to get back at him. For example putting mayonnaise in his coffee. I’m joking that’s probably a bad idea though tempting.