Am I the only Aspie who likes being touched?

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Joe90
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13 Mar 2018, 3:48 pm

Being touched or hugged doesn't bother me one bit. A hug makes me feel emotionally connected to people. I love to be hugged when I'm having a meltdown. It always helps me feel better.

And people touching me as they talk makes me feel socially accepted, like a friendship. I don't mean in a sexual way, although I love being sexually touched and cuddled and kissed, etc, by my boyfriend. Doesn't matter what mood I'm in, I always welcome his physical contact.

Even as a child I loved being touched. I loved it when other girls wanted to play with my hair, I let them do it for as long as they could. Also, this may sound gross, but I remember I liked getting headlice as a kid because it meant my mum would put me in front of the TV to watch cartoons for ages while she combed through my hair to get rid of the lice. Ahh, heaven it felt!

Is anyone else like me?


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elsapelsa
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13 Mar 2018, 3:50 pm

My daughter is a very cuddly aspie, but only with me and only on her own terms. She wouldn't like having to cuddle a relative or greet an unfamiliar person. I myself find excessive psychical greetings in particular kissing on both cheeks fairly hard work.


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auntblabby
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13 Mar 2018, 3:52 pm

I like kind touch as well :heart:



aspergersman
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13 Mar 2018, 4:03 pm

I love being touched by attractive women :lol:



naturalplastic
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13 Mar 2018, 4:18 pm

Don't mind being touched, and had no problem going along with the camp culture and giving/receiving hugs at at a "touchy-feely" church retreat I stayed at for a while.

Not all aspies are like that kid on the Parenthood show.



Spiderpig
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13 Mar 2018, 4:21 pm

I’m not that fond of being touched, but I treasure to this day the memories of two specific instances from my teenage years that felt like pure heaven, wishing I could experience something like that again, but knowing it’s rather unlikely. I can’t even tell if that counted as sexual touching on my part—I’m pretty sure it didn’t on theirs, and they’d probably be grossed out if they were to hear me tell this, if not feel retroactively raped.


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sunshinescj
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13 Mar 2018, 4:23 pm

I like touch as well. Not my hair/scalp I'm tender headed but I love hugs and I will often end up touching family members/close friends when talking to them. I also like flabby skin e.g. When I was younger I would grab and pull my parents' cheeks and play with the skin on my grandma's hand/arm. Nice to find other Aspies/ASDers who like touch. It's always frustrating to see "dislikes touch" near the top of any symptoms/signs list.



DaughterOfAule
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13 Mar 2018, 4:42 pm

I generally do not like being touched.
Though I've had two people that were exceptions. They could cuddle, hug, and whatever me and I had absolutely no problem with it. I actually like it and wish I felt that way about other people because the physical contact really is nice, but it's just not the same with anyone else. (Shhh... you didn't just read an admission that introverted show-no-feelings me actually enjoys cuddling :P)

Also, for some strange reason, anyone can play with my hair and I completely don't mind (as long as their hands are clean). I find it relaxing. I think part of the reason I am okay with it is that they aren't directly touching me.

So I suppose I could say: I like touch but only if I am completely comfortable around you (only ever happened with two people) or you are only touching my hair.


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Spiderpig
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13 Mar 2018, 5:15 pm

My hair is such a tricky thing,
As clean though it may be,
And clean as well your hand at first
Shan’t stroke the top of me.

For if you were to disobey,
Your fingers you’d soon find
Anointed, dripping oily filth
That seeps out fore and hind.


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elbowgrease
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13 Mar 2018, 5:34 pm

My feelings about it are varied.
I can do handshakes and hugs with just about anyone, and they're rather numb on my part. I don't like any kind of excessive touching during average interaction. I don't like being touched when I'm feeling down, although I do like having my head rubbed then.
But then there's the sort of hypersexual side of me that just can't get enough physical contact.
It's hard to differentiate sometimes.



ZombieBrideXD
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13 Mar 2018, 6:00 pm

of course not! the "dont touch me" thing is a stereotype. i for one, as a child would randomly hug strangers, it was cute until i was 13 and then it got a little inappropriate so i was told to stop. i dont mind hugs just i dont like cuddling. espeicially with someone romantically it just makes me uncomfortable and bored.

i like firm hard touch. not soft touch.


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WitchsCat
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13 Mar 2018, 6:04 pm

For me, it depends on who is touching me. If it is my husband, friend, or family member, then I pretty much enjoy the feeling, whether it be a hug or even a pat on the head. However, when it's someone I don't know too well, I tend to be uncomfortable, but I still shake their hand. I don't like it, however, when I get startled by a touch (such as shoulder taps)


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ltcvnzl
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13 Mar 2018, 6:11 pm

i don't like being touched if it's unexpected, but i guess most of people are like this?

once a random guy on the street grabbed my arm and it was so terrible, i spent a long time taking a longer way to work to avoid going to the place where it happened because i felt really bad.

if it's someone i know and touch me but i wasn't expect the touch i feel a bit annoyed and i feel very hard to give it back (like a hug or a kiss), i just feel clumsy. but it's nothing really serious. ok, even with people i expect to be touched by i often feel a bit awkward on answering the touch but i don't feel annoyed or bad about it, but i don't feel good about it neither, it's most neutral.

although i didn't felt any of it with my ex-boyfriend and i guess that is one of the reasons i love him a lot. it was very nice and comfortable whatever physical contact we had. there is also a girl in the university whom i like the hugs, we are not really close, but i feel comfortable with her somehow.



TracyLou
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13 Mar 2018, 7:35 pm

My husband doesn't like to be approached, but he loves to give hugs and hold hands. It took him a couple of years before I could approach him, sometimes he is still sensitive.



EzraS
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13 Mar 2018, 9:10 pm

I am comforted by touch from family members. But I don't initiate it and I don't return it.



Dear_one
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13 Mar 2018, 9:28 pm

There was almost no physical contact in my family of origin, and no bonding with my parents. My first peer group enjoyed hugs, and I did too. I feel much less anxiety in a group that hugs regularly and well. The secret of a great hug, BTW, is to focus on using your hands as you would to hold an infant, adjusting for size and position. Because I find touch exotic, I give it all my attention, which inspired people to send me for some massage lessons. Later, I so impressed a friend that she got me a job at a spa, where I got good tips and comments. For me, touch can make up for the lack of the reassurance most people get from eye contact and easy conversation.