Do Aspies fail to be happy?

Post Reply New Topic

People with Asperger's tend to have high IQ's. People with high IQ's tend to be more unhappy and depressed than people with low to average IQ's. Ernest Hemingway said, "Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know." Intelligent people are never satisfied or content with what they have and are always looking for better. Intelligent people overthink and over analyze everything making it hard for them to enjoy the moment. They also have the tendency to look back on their past mistakes and be self critical of themselves. Intelligent people feel that the world is a terrible place and that the future of humanity is doomed. I feel that this is why I can never fully enjoy anything. I am above average in my intelligence and I just cannot find happiness in any aspect of my life. When I do experience pleasure or something I enjoy it is only temporary and it never feels like it is enough to satisfy me. I feel that my childhood is the happiest I have ever been and ever will be. Sometimes I wish I was dumb so I wouldn't think so much or give a crap about anything.

I think its also the alienation and isolation lead to depression.

You're over-generalizing. I also think it's pretty insulting to imply that if someone is happy or doesn't think the world is a terrible place, then they're not intelligent.

I never fail to be happy. I choose to be happy every day.

^^Yeah, but he also said, "Intelligent people feel that the world is a terrible place and that the future of humanity is doomed."

Anyway, Aspies are prone to depression, but that's probably because of prejudice/abuse and feeling different from others, and possibly biological factors. Not necessarily intelligence.

I am generally happy, but am saddened at times when I realize how much ground I need to make up.

I know someone who's got a 15-year-old son who is not on the spectrum but has above average IQ, and he is the happiest person I know. For a teenage boy he is surprisingly laid-back and always positive. He's good at seeing life from a positive angle, and nothing ever seems to worry him. He has always been like this. But he is very intelligent, and is in the top classes for science, history and geography (and probably other subjects too). His siblings aren't the same as him.

I've been a good match to the "depressive realist" label for a long time. It's a controversial concept that suggests people such as myself are somewhat unhappy because as staunch realists we refuse to put a positive spin on things. People generally prop themselves up with a bit of wishful thinking, it seems. They groundlessly assume that things will probably get better. However badly they behave, they usually cling to the idea that they're justified. They're not interested in their weaknesses. Whatever crap goes down on Earth, they believe there's a supreme being who will put it all right one day. Doing the lottery gives them hope of great wealth, which helps them go on, though a simple statistical analysis would show that nearly all of them will end up out of pocket. They toil for years thinking they can achieve the American Dream, though it's probably about as achievable as winning the lottery. Traditionally they've believed in a utopian afterlife, without requiring its existence to be demonstrated.

I don't know whether Aspies are more geared to diligent truth-seeking than anybody else. We're often said to be pathologically honest, so maybe there's a connection. Perhaps the problem is in thinking that the truth will set us free and lead to happiness. Personally I think it'll just make us "better" informed, but not necessarily happier.

I think we tend to live in the logical part of our minds, at the expense of the emotional side. I wouldn't expect that to lead to much happiness.

Happiness is over-rated. Usefulness, progress, satisfaction with accomplishments... those are much more important to me. Important caveat, I have alexithymia, so I could be totally wrong and happiness could be EVERYTHING! I doubt it, though.

I wouldn't say I'm pathologically honest though. I'm quite good at telling a white lie to save someone's feelings or to avoid trouble. Plus I'm more of an emotional person than a logical person.

^
I don't know, personally I sometimes get a rush of thought that feels wonderfully exciting, just for a minute, and then the elation deserts me and I feel a wave of sorrow and frustration. It's as if I've over-reacted to the thoughts with great hope and elation, then the dream is broken.