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Childfree Autistic Relatives

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Dear_one
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11 Nov 2018, 11:39 am

^^ Yeah, I was referring to the cohort of failed saints, but couldn't think of a graceful way to throw that it.



lostonearth35
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11 Nov 2018, 12:01 pm

I don't understand why people in this day and age still think anyone who doesn't want kids is weird, whether they are autistic or NT.



Richard_the_ Dogged
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13 Nov 2018, 5:37 pm

Being childfree goes way way back, probably to the Nazarenes. Like probably back to Samson.

Its just that usually religious celibates say that the issue is abstaining from sex. But that alone would make very little sense. Staying childfree is the real issue.

So it has always been a two faced doctrine, being childfree while preaching pronatalism.

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AnnieAnn
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21 Nov 2018, 10:14 am

imdoneone wrote:
Should autistic relatives avoid having children because it's hereditary?


It depends on the person I think. In my case, I wasn't worried about having an autistic child as much as worrying about what type of parent I would be to a child. I decided I would not make a good parent and I'm great with quiet animals. My dad is autistic and although he was great at providing for us, he has not developed any sort of caring relationship or nurturing behavior at all to his offspring although he loves us. Not really his fault or intentional but he just is not wired for that sort of thing.



kraftiekortie
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21 Nov 2018, 11:46 am

I’m that “weird uncle” who never had kids.



AnnieAnn
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21 Nov 2018, 11:58 am

lostonearth35 wrote:
I don't understand why people in this day and age still think anyone who doesn't want kids is weird, whether they are autistic or NT.



Its so true, in this day and age you would think it would be more accepted. I'm the only one in my family and cousins etc. and neigborhood who has not had and wanted children and they think it is very weird and probably feel sorry for me judging by the way they act.



IstominFan
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22 Nov 2018, 10:18 am

I'm the crazy cat lady who never married and had kids. The term "childfree" is a slap in my face. Some of us never experienced what it was like to date or be loved, let alone get married or have children. It wasn't my choice. Circumstances dictated that it would never happen for me. In childhood, I was "the weird girl." In my teens and 20s, I prioritized getting good grades in high school and college. Never getting a driver's license until my 40s, however, held me back.

I never grew up "normally." Now I have a good, active life, but still have never dated. I am beginning to think I got out there too late and nobody is left for me.



Dear_one
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22 Nov 2018, 10:27 am

IstominFan wrote:
I'm the crazy cat lady who never married and had kids. The term "childfree" is a slap in my face. Some of us never experienced what it was like to date or be loved, let alone get married or have children. It wasn't my choice. Circumstances dictated that it would never happen for me. In childhood, I was "the weird girl." In my teens and 20s, I prioritized getting good grades in high school and college. Never getting a driver's license until my 40s, however, held me back.

I never grew up "normally." Now I have a good, active life, but still have never dated. I am beginning to think I got out there too late and nobody is left for me.


Would you want a second date with a guy who kept mentioning he wished he was with Venus Williams instead?



BenderRodriguez
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22 Nov 2018, 10:38 am

lostonearth35 wrote:
I don't understand why people in this day and age still think anyone who doesn't want kids is weird, whether they are autistic or NT.


Short answer, people still love poking their nose into everybody else's business.


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harry12345
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22 Nov 2018, 10:43 am

imdoneone wrote:
Should autistic relatives avoid having children because it's hereditary?


No. Where would you draw the line?

There are lots of hereditary "issues" that can be passed on to offspring. Should one not have kids because of a history of "X" in the family?



harry12345
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22 Nov 2018, 10:44 am

BenderRodriguez wrote:
lostonearth35 wrote:
I don't understand why people in this day and age still think anyone who doesn't want kids is weird, whether they are autistic or NT.


Short answer, people still love poking their nose into everybody else's business.


8O



Dear_one
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22 Nov 2018, 10:51 am

harry12345 wrote:
imdoneone wrote:
Should autistic relatives avoid having children because it's hereditary?


No. Where would you draw the line?

There are lots of hereditary "issues" that can be passed on to offspring. Should one not have kids because of a history of "X" in the family?


Heritable traits are not good or bad by themselves. With every generation, they get combined with another set that may or may not work well together. We deplore psychopaths, but maybe we only deplore those who also lack other factors that could have turned them into a whistleblower instead. Also, who knows what the future needs?