anyone content and satisfied with their lives ?

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chris1989
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30 Jan 2019, 4:21 pm

I seem to feel that I am not completely content and satisfied with what I've been doing in my twenties. At 20, I was still at college finishing my BTEC diploma in art and design, at 21, did volunteering before University, at 22 went to university but after 3 months I left due to stress of work there and never graduated at 23, 24 and 25 I was out of work and attending employment courses and been working now at 26, 27, 28 and 29. But I still feel unfulfilled particularly between 22 and 26. I seem to envy those who left school when they were 16 or 17 and went on to university, graduated and got there degree by the time they are 20, 21 or 22 and have fulfilled their lives already with a dream career and job and feel really satisfied with their lives whereas I did do that as I left school at 18 and didn't go to uni until 22. Am I the only one feeling dissatisfied ? my cousin is 23 and is a lawyer and it makes me think why didn't I achieve something like that. I feel like everyone right now in their 20s has had a degree, has a great job, plenty of money, in a relationship, has many friends to hang out with, has a car, and enjoying every single day of their lives.



jack1992
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30 Jan 2019, 4:59 pm

The trouble is, we don't all have the same advantages which enable us to succeed. For example, the vast majority of people don't have autism (or at least most aren't on the high end of the spectrum) and this gives neurotypicals advantages such as better social interactions and rapport with potential employers and work colleagues. It is much more of a challenge to succeed when you are faced with these drawbacks.

All of my cousins are in successful careers and have healthy relationships and yes, it hurts to see them get on in life while I'm stuck at home with no friends and no relationships with autism/social anxiety/depression/depersonalization but then I remind myself it isn't my fault I have these conditions. It was much easier for my cousins to get where they are because they didn't have the problems I had. I don't have any brothers or sisters so I don't have them to compare myself to.

Unfortunately, life is not fair and to be frank, it downright sucks right now and I am far from satisfied or content. I am in a place mentally where I have no motivation, nothing really matters and I just feel dead inside, and I have felt this way for over 10 years, sometimes have been worse than others, but the good times are short lasting as of late.

If you can get into a positive mindset and somehow not let unfortunate circumstances get to you, then that is a great achievement. Sadly, I have not yet managed this myself!

But the fact you OP have actually been to college, university and have held down a job is a great achievement and just remember, you could be a lot worse. You could be like me, who left school at 16 and just became a recluse and gave up. So just remember when you feel like you're not good enough where you are, that you could be much worse!



Joe90
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30 Jan 2019, 6:09 pm

I am satisfied with my life, but not with who I am.


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EpixAndoid
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30 Jan 2019, 6:20 pm

jack1992 wrote:
All of my cousins are in successful careers and have healthy relationships and yes, it hurts to see them get on in life while I'm stuck at home with no friends and no relationships with autism/social anxiety/depression/depersonalization but then I remind myself it isn't my fault I have these conditions. It was much easier for my cousins to get where they are because they didn't have the problems I had. I don't have any brothers or sisters so I don't have them to compare myself to.

Unfortunately, life is not fair and to be frank, it downright sucks right now and I am far from satisfied or content. I am in a place mentally where I have no motivation, nothing really matters and I just feel dead inside, and I have felt this way for over 10 years, sometimes have been worse than others, but the good times are short lasting as of late.

Wow, I feel the same way, however I’m only 22. Annoying as that is, I am at a point in my life where I have a pretty good idea of what I want to do, but have a lot of anxiety in not only expressing said idea for a career path, but my parents are realists who tell me things as they are, whereas I am an idealist, and see the world and how it could be.



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30 Jan 2019, 7:30 pm

I have a job in my special interest, own my own home, and have enough saved up for retirement.
And I had a LTR until it was ended by a nasty illness.

So, yes, I'm pretty satisfied with how things are turning out.



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30 Jan 2019, 8:06 pm

I have a husband and two cat children, as well as our own house and an upcoming volunteer opportunity at the botanical garden's library. The only things I feel that need improved is self-confidence, as well as how to handle finances. Luckily, my husband is an expert in that field, and I hope to improve in that area too.


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Edna3362
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31 Jan 2019, 2:42 am

I'm satisfied with my life and those around me. Everything else is just a really good bonus. I have no real problem towards my own circumstances, what I'm granted with or attained so far.

But never with myself. Not as I'm now, but not as much as I had been then. I'm my own biggest problem and that's just all. :lol:


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31 Jan 2019, 7:43 am

I was satisfied and content for about 15 years, during which time I felt all of the bad times I'd gone through prior to that and the problems I'd brought upon myself had been worth it. Now that things have gone wrong again, I'm once again back to lamenting my distant past.

Career wise, I don't give a toss, it's past relationships and friendships (and the current lack of) that is the source of my dissatisfaction with life.



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31 Jan 2019, 7:51 am

I have a warm bed to sleep in, under a dry roof; there's ample food in the larder, I'm (relatively) pain-free, and I have a mate who dearly loves me, and who I delight in loving in return. None of this has always been so, and all of this will one day pass. What do I have to complain about?

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31 Jan 2019, 12:49 pm

I'm certainly not satisfied with my life, but should I even be satisfied with it?
I'm still young, and as can go with that I haven't yet had much of an impact on anything. If I was content perhaps I never would.


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AceofPens
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31 Jan 2019, 4:00 pm

I go back and forth. I've missed out on a lot because of autism - school, friends, relationships, independence. I haven't been able to do hardly anything at the typical rate or in the normal way. It is frustrating, but I'm extremely lucky in some regards. Even though I'm on the lower end of high functioning, I think it likely that I'll be employable in some form in the near future, maybe even within the next year or two if it's only part time. My independence skills are growing steadily, I have access to accommodations and a family that's (mostly) willing to help me along even after I've turned eighteen. I've never had the desire to be exceptional, as you express. The prospect of achieving the normal standard of independence and base-line success (house, job, and family by fifty) is daunting enough. And while I am very sensitive to the fact that I'm behind my peers, I have to accept that this was unavoidable due to my circumstances. This past year things have become a little easier for me, and I'm extremely grateful for that, too. I think it's fair to say that I'm mostly contented at this point in my life (knock on wood).


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31 Jan 2019, 5:03 pm

I was a late starter on a lot of things (except for education), so I have a long way to go yet.



Prometheus18
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31 Jan 2019, 6:30 pm

I'd say I'm about as satisfied with my life as I can be.



Ichinin
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01 Feb 2019, 1:23 am

I don't have a problem with self confidence (rather the opposite), as an analyst i do more, i write my own tools to accomplish tasks and recently i wrote a program to accelerate report writing. I have my own place in a high class area, i make a decent living (not as much as i should but i'm working on it) and my bank account is satisfying, i have the techgadgets i want and if i want something i can just go and buy it. I am never hungry and i can go and eat what i want. I do what i want on my free time, i have traveled the world and i live in a democracy with freedom of speech, the right to roam in nature and all that.

The only thing missing is love.


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EzraS
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01 Feb 2019, 8:49 am

I'd say I accept it.



Bustduster
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01 Feb 2019, 9:20 am

I wouldn't say I'm content with every single aspect of my life, but objectively I doubt anyone is. I'm not unhappy about like I was when I was in my early 20s though, which is good.

Also, in response to the OP - it may look like everyone around you has a more active and fulfilled life that you do, but many people have private issues that they don't broadcast to those they know, which means they're probably not as content as they appear to you.