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skibum
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23 Feb 2019, 5:53 pm

Those of you who are familiar with Elisabeth Kubler-Ross's work and other studies describing what happens to someone as his or her body approaches death and prepares to die, I have a question for you. Have any of you gone through that super intense cycle that she describes, or any part of it and survived? Well, obviously you would have survived if you are reading this, but I am wondering if any of you have experienced that pre-death preparing for death cycle that the mind goes through. It is extremely intense and it is not comparable to anything else.

I have gone through it, I believe four times in my life and the reason that I believe that I have is that I have compared my experience with the experiences that are written about in these studies. The studies were done in hostels.

I am wondering if this it is common among the Autistic community to have this happen or if it is a more unique experience to myself and to my Autistic friend in real life whom I know has also experienced this and a very few others who might have as well. The experience is what people go through at the actual moments that their minds are preparing for physical death. It is a human experience that apparently everyone, according to these studies, experiences. It usually ends in the actual physical death of the body.

I don't want to say too much more about it because I want people to respond from their own experiences if they think they have gone through this. So what I will say is that when I have gone through it and when my friend has, it is literally the most emotionally intense thing I have ever experienced and I cannot compare it to any other experience. It is completely involuntary and it feels like an actual literal suicide expect that you are not physically dead. That is the best way I can put it. I have had a lot of suicidal thoughts and feelings throughout my life and they are always very intense. This is way more and way beyond that. It feels like the mind is actually carrying out the suicide and there is nothing I can do about it. It is the most painful emotional experience I have ever had. Nothing else can come close to comparing to it. Is there anyone who can relate?


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skibum
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23 Feb 2019, 9:15 pm

I see that out of 37 views no one has responded. Is that because no one who has viewed this has had this experience? I am trying to understand if this is a very rare phenomenon or if it is common in the Autistic community. If you guys don't mind, please let me know with a yes or no if you have experienced this and if you have, what it was like for you. That would help me very much. Thank you.


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Zinnia86
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23 Feb 2019, 9:38 pm

I'm trying to figure out what you're asking for. Are you asking about whether anyone has gone through the five(+) stages of grief as one approaches death? Or do you want to know more specifically about near-death experiences? Or are you asking even more specifically about suicide attempts?



skibum
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23 Feb 2019, 9:55 pm

I am asking if anyone has actually gone through the five steps or as many steps since not everyone goes through all five equally, and if they have, what is was like for them. But not just normal grief, anger, depression, bargaining and acceptance but the actual intensity of the steps as the body is literally preparing to die.


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24 Feb 2019, 12:57 am

I have read Kubler-Ross, and various NDE accounts. I have had about a dozen amazing paranormal experiences, but none that match pre-death.
People who do attempt suicide get a rush of chemicals from their body telling them not to do it. Perhaps your mind is similarly telling you to trash part of your life to change direction, not the whole thing.



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24 Feb 2019, 6:18 am

If you want to get feedback on a subject like suicide and that kind of extremely personal stuff, don't post a thread in the open part of the forum.

Dear_one wrote:
Perhaps your mind is similarly telling you to trash part of your life to change direction, not the whole thing.


^ That.


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skibum
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24 Feb 2019, 6:18 am

Dear_one wrote:
I have read Kubler-Ross, and various NDE accounts. I have had about a dozen amazing paranormal experiences, but none that match pre-death.
People who do attempt suicide get a rush of chemicals from their body telling them not to do it. Perhaps your mind is similarly telling you to trash part of your life to change direction, not the whole thing.
That is a really interesting thought. I wonder if that was the case and I was experiencing it in an extreme way. I had three of these cycles after a single traumatic event and I believe that they were a direct result of that event. I was abandoned in a brutal way by the family member that I am completely attached and bonded to at a four year old emotional level. (my emotional capacity caps at four) and when he left and disappeared without any warning or preparation or explanation, my four year old emotional mind could not handle it. Because I have such a young emotional capacity, he is the only person in my entire life who fully accepted that part of me and that I was able to really completely bond with emotionally. My Autistic friend who also has had these types of episodes had his first one when he lost his family. My Autistic friend is the other person with whom my emotional self is very close but we have never physically met because he lives all the way on the other side of the country. So my family member was the only person ever whom the four year old part of me knew intimately as a physical presence. He was "her" best friend and almost like a loving parent. He was the only tangible connection "she" had with humans, he was in essence, "her" only human connection that she could see and touch. In my entire life which spans over 50 years, the emotional part of me, my youngest persona, has only fully bonded with two people, that particular family member and my Autistic friend who lives in a different state.

My family member and I have since reconnected and he understands now what his leaving did to me. He had no idea that I would be affected by it. We are super close again, but just at a distance because he moved to another state when he left. But I was permanently neurologically, mentally, and psychically changed by experiencing those death prep moments. My Autistic friend was also mentally and physically permanently changed after he went through his first one. We believe that the grief and the intensity of emotions that we experienced during those times would have literally killed many people.


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Last edited by skibum on 24 Feb 2019, 6:24 am, edited 3 times in total.

skibum
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24 Feb 2019, 6:20 am

Ichinin wrote:
If you want to get feedback on a subject like suicide and that kind of extremely personal stuff, don't post a thread in the open part of the forum.

Dear_one wrote:
Perhaps your mind is similarly telling you to trash part of your life to change direction, not the whole thing.


^ That.
I posted the thread here because I am doing research on how many people go through this type of experience. This is not a suicide thread. It is a particular phenomenon that occurs completely involuntarily.

We also talk about extremely personal stuff on the open forum all the time. it's not a problem because we are all anonymous.


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24 Feb 2019, 10:52 am

After my worst loss-of-faith episode (in people) my counsellor gave the usual advice about seeing things differently. Years later, they still look about the same, but life has improved because I see far more related facts. The advice might better have been to see more things, broaden my perspective, or develop new talents.
Life is full of surprises, both good and bad. Like a business, you should try to avoid dependence on any single source. Variety is good for both parties.



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24 Feb 2019, 1:13 pm

skibum wrote:
We also talk about extremely personal stuff on the open forum all the time. it's not a problem because we are all anonymous.


No, we're not anonymous, an alias does not work that way. And there are things people does not talk about. My real name for example, can be found in less than a minute and so can anyone else who is as open as me on the forum. And how YOU perceive something is not how EVERYONE ELSE percieve it.

You may ask well ask something like: "Hey, who was raped as a child? Please post it here openly on Wrong planet". "Uh, i get no responses"... #Duh

Regardless, i have nothing to contribute to this tread anyway, just wanted to build a little empathy and understanding in your brain, wasted effort as usual on these forums...


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skibum
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24 Feb 2019, 4:09 pm

Ichinin wrote:
skibum wrote:
We also talk about extremely personal stuff on the open forum all the time. it's not a problem because we are all anonymous.


No, we're not anonymous, an alias does not work that way. And there are things people does not talk about. My real name for example, can be found in less than a minute and so can anyone else who is as open as me on the forum. And how YOU perceive something is not how EVERYONE ELSE percieve it.

You may ask well ask something like: "Hey, who was raped as a child? Please post it here openly on Wrong planet". "Uh, i get no responses"... #Duh

Regardless, i have nothing to contribute to this tread anyway, just wanted to build a little empathy and understanding in your brain, wasted effort as usual on these forums...
I am very sorry that I caused you stress and trouble


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skibum
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24 Feb 2019, 4:11 pm

Dear_one wrote:
After my worst loss-of-faith episode (in people) my counsellor gave the usual advice about seeing things differently. Years later, they still look about the same, but life has improved because I see far more related facts. The advice might better have been to see more things, broaden my perspective, or develop new talents.
Life is full of surprises, both good and bad. Like a business, you should try to avoid dependence on any single source. Variety is good for both parties.
Yes, that is true. Unfortunately unlike a business, a little child's bonding does not really work that way. But it is good advice none the less. Thank you


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skibum
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24 Feb 2019, 4:12 pm

I think we'd better lock this thread now


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24 Feb 2019, 4:47 pm

Skibum,

October 5, 2014 an ascending aortic aneurysm ruptured with great damage to my entire aorta. I thought it was a case of food poisoning from dinner and just went to bed, this was Friday evening. Saturday I felt a little better and drove to the drug store and purchased the largest bottle or Pepto that I could find unaware of the internal bleeding. Slept all day and when I awoke on Sunday I felt pretty terrible, called my daughter who when she saw me told me to get dressed and drove me to the hospital. By that time I could not walk from the car to the hospital entrance and required a wheelchair to finish the entrance. I could feel my body breaking down. After the initial examination I was transferred by ambulance (siren blaring all the way) to the Mpls. Heart Institute Hospital where I had emergency surgery and treatment; kidney and liver failure, extensive blood loss, blood clots, among other issues. I was strangely calm feeling my body shutting down and dying. Two surgeries, three resuscitations, and an NDE I woke 36 hours later. That experience has dramatically changed me and intensified the asperger's and OCD aspects of my psychology.


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skibum
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24 Feb 2019, 5:17 pm

Wow. That is really intense. I am so glad that you are alive and that your daughter was there to help you. Thank you so much for sharing this experience. How was your Autism and OCD changed from it?


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24 Feb 2019, 6:10 pm

skibum wrote:
Dear_one wrote:
After my worst loss-of-faith episode (in people) my counsellor gave the usual advice about seeing things differently. Years later, they still look about the same, but life has improved because I see far more related facts. The advice might better have been to see more things, broaden my perspective, or develop new talents.
Life is full of surprises, both good and bad. Like a business, you should try to avoid dependence on any single source. Variety is good for both parties.
Yes, that is true. Unfortunately unlike a business, a little child's bonding does not really work that way. But it is good advice none the less. Thank you


"It takes a village to raise a child." By age four, kids are usually poking around, and trusting several people. Your first experience was awful - like falling out of a boat, but eventually, something like that will happen again, so it is time to learn to swim as well as you can. Sometimes, practice helps more than anticipated.