I can't really relate to that, I suppose. I was just mistreated as a child and in my teens so much that people not liking me became the norm; it just doesn't raise up any emotions anymore. Actually, it's the opposite: if someone says they like me or seem to like me I start wondering what they want, what they think I can give them, what use they think I'll be to them. And if I get convinced that they really do think I'm nice and just enjoy my company, as in my company is the thing they want from me, then I start wondering what's wrong with them since they consider someone like me good enough to spend their time on. What's so wrong with them that they can't get better friends? Of course, logically thinking I know that this isn't how it goes all the time, but sometimes it's very hard to be logical.
kraftiekortie wrote:
I would say most bullies back off if you fight back. They acquire a sort of "grudging" respect for you.
The more you don't fight back, the more ammunition the bully has at his/her disposal in the bullying of you.
I'm not saying there are not exceptions. But I'm saying this as a general rule.
Back at school, we who got bullied were usually told to ignore the bullies since reacting in any way would just "add fuel to the fire."
A friend of mine, a bit unskilled socially for his age, always got in trouble for fighting back. He was clumsier socially than the bullies, so the bullies got off easier with the teachers 'cause they knew what to say.
In junior high, I kept getting in trouble because I was bullied. I told the teachers, the teachers scolded the bullies and made them apologize, and then
I got in to trouble for not saying "I forgive you." Why would I have said it when I didn't really mean it? That would've been lying... plus it never took long for them to start bullying others again. Some of my clothes even got ruined by them, I got no payment for it yet the teachers were
still mad at
me for not saying I forgive them.