Being disliked hurts

Page 11 of 15 [ 238 posts ] Go to page Previous 1 ... 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15 Next

Joined: 3 Dec 2016
Gender: Female
Posts: 755

16 May 2019, 6:49 pm

Marknis wrote:

How can I "build myself"? My mind keeps telling me everything is too late and I could never overcome the obstacles I faced with the things I wanted to be good at. I still can't play a guitar solo or complex songs despite having a guitar since 2002 and I haven't written any songs despite how I used to hope I would be a professional musician one day. I don't have any books published and I am turning 31 soon. I struggle to draw despite my age as well to the point I don't even try at all these days. I reached adulthood only because I figuratively sat around and my brain stopped growing physically before I could develop special talents.

Then for god's sake DO SOMETHING ELSE. Lots of people can't play guitar. Lots of people can't draw. Lots of people don't really have a talent. Neither do you. Congrats, neither does MOST of the population of the world. But Jesus Christ FIND SOMETHING ELSE TO FOCUS ON. Part of being an adult is having the ability to admit your limitations and DO SOMETHING ELSE THAT YOU CAN DO and be a contributing and functioning member of society. Quit moaning over the things you can't do and do something with yourself that you can.

You know why those hip hoppers and thugs and all those other guys you hate have girlfriends? Because they probably have jobs, they probably have their own places, they probably have things to offer THAT YOU DON'T.

I don't know what it's going to take to make you see that you're causing your own problems but if you don't turn this around you'll be spinning your wheels for the rest of your life and literally nothing will change.

_________________
That which does not kill us makes us stranger.

kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

16 May 2019, 6:51 pm

I can't play guitar. I can't draw. I have no special talent.

Fnord
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 6 May 2008
Age: 67
Gender: Male
Posts: 59,841
Location: Stendec

16 May 2019, 7:22 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:

I can't play guitar. I can't draw. I have no special talent.

You have empathy, and you like to help people. That's more than most of us.

_________________

No love for Hamas, Hezbollah, Iranian Leadership, Islamic Jihad, other Islamic terrorist groups, OR their supporters and sympathizers.

littlebee
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 8 Mar 2013
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,338

16 May 2019, 7:35 pm

I did not read the whole thread as it got so mundane, though will try to, for entertainment mainly, at this point, but a good idea is to encourage each other not to be overly sensitive to words. Encouraging this kind of over-sensitivity is imo often (though not always) a form of enabling that weakens and cripples the so-called victims.

Luhluhluh
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 3 Dec 2016
Gender: Female
Posts: 755

16 May 2019, 8:13 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:

I can't play guitar. I can't draw. I have no special talent.

Me either. I used to want to be an artist, but at some point I had to admit I was terrible. That's having self-awareness. I like doing it just for fun but I'll never make any career out of it so I found something else to do as a job. It's somewhat childish clinging to a fantasy of being a rock star or whatever past ones teenage years.

_________________
That which does not kill us makes us stranger.

Marknis
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 24 Jan 2016
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,960
Location: The Vile Belt

16 May 2019, 9:31 pm

Luhluhluh wrote:

kraftiekortie wrote:

I can't play guitar. I can't draw. I have no special talent.

I don't want to be a rock star. I just want to make my own songs and have some friends to perform with. Two former co-workers of mine had their own bands and while they aren't famous, they still play shows and put out albums. They also have girlfriends who are into the arts as well. I wish I had what they had.

kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

16 May 2019, 9:36 pm

I would like that, too. But it’s beyond my abilities.

I’ve written poems, but not songs.

I’m a stick-figure man when it comes to drawing.

Marknis
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 24 Jan 2016
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,960
Location: The Vile Belt

16 May 2019, 9:44 pm

Luhluhluh wrote:

Marknis wrote:

Are you telling me to give up on wanting love?

A lot of the hip-hoppers I know are on welfare and don't necessarily live in their own places. They also agree with rednecks on bigotry towards LGBT people and non-Christians as well as sexism towards women. They aren't people I will ever be friends with nor look up to.

I don't want people telling me I can't have a girlfriend or that I can't have any individuality.

Last edited by Marknis on 16 May 2019, 10:49 pm, edited 2 times in total.

The Grand Inquisitor
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 9 Aug 2015
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,757

16 May 2019, 9:49 pm

Luhluhluh wrote:

Marknis wrote:

QFT

Marknis
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 24 Jan 2016
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,960
Location: The Vile Belt

16 May 2019, 10:01 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:

I would like that, too. But it’s beyond my abilities.

I’ve written poems, but not songs.

I’m a stick-figure man when it comes to drawing.

My former coworkers are able to succeed despite living in a culture that hates what makes them who they are. They are both in technical fields, they both play music that isn't in vogue with the culture here (Death-thrash and hardcore punk), both can beat up those who get upset with them for not being Trump fanboys, and they have girlfriends who aren't brainwashed by the Bible Belt.

EzraS
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 24 Sep 2013
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,828
Location: Twin Peaks

16 May 2019, 10:08 pm

BeaArthur wrote:

EzraS wrote:

I honestly don't understand why someone would post to threads they think are a waste of time along with the OP not wanting wanting their input.

Good point, Ez, just why did you do that doggedly with (that Canadian guy*, I forget his name right now) for so long?

Goldfish21 is someone I ague with on a verity of topics. Just as I argue with cyberdad, Kraichgauer and others.

BeaArthur wrote:

I guess you have grown up quite a bit since then, for which I commend you.

Yes I am a grown man.

BeaArthur wrote:

All the same, got any insight as to why someone keeps contributing to threads where there will never be any change of perspective from the antagonist? Threads which are undeniably a waste of one's time

It's about having a fixation of course. Being tired of someone posting same stuff over and over and wanting that person to disappear. Considering them to be a troll of sorts. Really the one I got fixated with along those lines wasn't Goldfish but rather ASS-P. However I stopped perusing him along those lines quite some time ago. My comment of "I honestly don't understand why someone would post to threads they think are a waste of time along with the OP not wanting wanting their input" was a bit tongue-in-cheek although probably only from my perspective.

kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

16 May 2019, 10:11 pm

I don’t like hardcore punk or death metal.

I like top 40 music from 40-50 years ago. The ultimate square is what I am.

I don’t admire people who go around beating up people.

If you like that music, go to places that play it. I hope you don’t get into the habit of getting into fights, though. That would be stupid.

EzraS
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 24 Sep 2013
Gender: Male
Posts: 27,828
Location: Twin Peaks

16 May 2019, 10:28 pm

Marknis wrote:

kraftiekortie wrote:

I would like that, too. But it’s beyond my abilities.

I’ve written poems, but not songs.

I’m a stick-figure man when it comes to drawing.

Are they autistic?

magz
Forum Moderator

Joined: 1 Jun 2017
Age: 39
Gender: Female
Posts: 16,283
Location: Poland

17 May 2019, 3:39 am

Marknis wrote:

Do you like them?

If I were in your situation and I knew people like that, I would hang out with them, playing the music we all like, going to concerts and enjoying our time our ways.

_________________
Let's not confuse being normal with being mentally healthy.

<not moderating PPR stuff concerning East Europe>

cubedemon6073
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 7 Nov 2008
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,953

17 May 2019, 5:29 am

Quote:

Here is my opinion. More then likely, he's been told he can do anything he sets his mind to. Everyone can develop a talent in anything. We live in a society that presents a skewed view of how things actually work when we're growing up. As a child, a number of children, are presented a disney-esque view of life.

Truth is everyone has things they're good at and things they're not so good at. Some things can be developed and some things can't be. But, some things are marketable and somethings are not. The truth of the matter is that not everyone will be able to be independent or be able to contribute in society. I wish our society would accept this.

I think you may want to look at the Bureau of Labor Statistics and the Brookings Institute. Truth is the majority of those who are disabled are not in the labor force. Telling Markinis to do for himself obviously is not working.

https://www.bls.gov/news.release/disabl.nr0.htm

https://www.bls.gov/news.release/disabl.t01.htm

https://www.brookings.edu/blog/the-aven ... -employed/

kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

17 May 2019, 5:36 am

He works part-time in a library, and has been doing this job for over a decade.

Page 11 of 15 [ 238 posts ] Go to page Previous 1 ... 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15 Next

Jump to:

Being disliked hurts Post Reply New Topic

Being disliked hurts