Revisiting Poll: Who Has It Harder? Male Or Female Aspies?

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plokijuh
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17 Sep 2019, 3:46 am

It's just a non question really. One could equally ask the same question of the general population. Which female aspie compared to which male? And in what context? And on what scale?


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aquafelix
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17 Sep 2019, 4:02 am

Tim_Tex wrote:
The problem with these threads is that they turn into flame wars almost instantly.


My bad. WP newbie. Maybe my naivety was to hope everyone might actually read my starting post. I live in hope.



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17 Sep 2019, 4:12 am

aquafelix wrote:
Tim_Tex wrote:
The problem with these threads is that they turn into flame wars almost instantly.


My bad. WP newbie. Maybe my naivety was to hope everyone might actually read my starting post. I live in hope.


No problem, you did nothing wrong. I am going by past threads regarding this topic, especially when posted in L&D.


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Joe90
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17 Sep 2019, 4:46 am

plokijuh wrote:
It's just a non question really. One could equally ask the same question of the general population. Which female aspie compared to which male? And in what context? And on what scale?


Well almost every woman I have met have said that men have it easier because they don't have to go through the pain of periods, pregnancy, childbirth and menopause.


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17 Sep 2019, 5:23 am

Wolfram87 wrote:
Assuming for a moment that this could be ascertained with any reasonable degree of accuracy, what would we then do with that information?


In order to get an accurate answer, we'd have to find out what things are hard on the way. If we got those, we'd know better how to help.



Wolfram87
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17 Sep 2019, 6:14 am

Fireblossom wrote:
Wolfram87 wrote:
Assuming for a moment that this could be ascertained with any reasonable degree of accuracy, what would we then do with that information?


In order to get an accurate answer, we'd have to find out what things are hard on the way. If we got those, we'd know better how to help.


You misunderstand. I'm talking about the specific piece of information of whether or not having Aspergers is more difficult for males or females, and what will be done based on that. As in, "having Aspergers is more difficult for males/females, therefore...".


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17 Sep 2019, 8:16 am

Women have it harder in some ways. Men in other ways. C’est la vie.

Concentrate on whether Cathy has it harder than Dave. Or whether Brian has it harder than Tiffany.

Concentrate on individual people. It’s better that way.



lvpin
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17 Sep 2019, 9:28 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
There is almost certainly an under-diagnosis of females when it comes to being diagnosed on the Autistic Spectrum.


This is one of the reasons it's hard for me to decide who has it harder because there are just very different problems. I was told before I was diagnosed that girls are harder to find because they are often very good at learning how to seem more normal so even if the behaviour is not natural, it seems that way so they will be dismissed. I think that would be really harmful because those who aren't diagnosed will deal with all the same problems but with none of the support and it makes me sad to think of others going through that. Not being diagnosed was destroying my relationships with family members and friends due to frequent extreme misunderstandings going both ways. Then when I was diagnosed I had to deal with people not believing that I would be affected as bad as I am so I got less understanding and people thinking I was being lazy/manipulative. Thinking of that stretching over a life time if you are diagnosed or not seems difficult.

On the other hand males on average are easier to diagnose and are more obviously autistic. This may mean that their autism may be taken more seriously but I can only imagine how they are probably treated in school settings for "seeming weird". Young people can be incredibly cruel to people they know are vulnerable. In general being more obviously different comes with it's own set of problems so you may have people believing you but not respecting/making fun of you.

Both situations have their own difficulties but as every individual is different it's hard to say who has it harder and it doesn't really matter. Every difficulty matters and should get sympathy & help. If you break your leg I'll still feel bad for you when you are in pain, even if I know somewhere else someone is starving.



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17 Sep 2019, 9:54 am

^^^That's precisely my point. We should look at individuals, rather than whole groups of people like "men" and "women."



Joe90
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17 Sep 2019, 11:03 am

I think I'd rather be a girl on the spectrum than a guy, because it seems that sometimes guys with HFA get misunderstood and falsely accused of being shoplifters or murderers. I'd hate that. Maybe girls do have it easier than guys, in regards to being able to mask and appear normal. I'm not saying this is the case with all Aspie guys.


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firemonkey
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19 Sep 2019, 4:45 am

Fireblossom wrote:
The Grand Inquisitor wrote:
On an unrelated note, I find if interesting that, despite the aspie ratio of four men to every one woman, there seems to be close to equal amounts of men and women on this site. Based on the statistics, I'd expect to see a greater amount of male users relative to the female users.


Some people say that women are more likelier to seek comfort from groups than men. If that's true then it'd be no wonder that more women would join a support forum. Or maybe more women end up making the connection between autism and their problems than men for some reason.



I've been on mental health forums for over 20 years. There have invariably been quite a lot more female members of those forums than males.



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19 Sep 2019, 5:07 am

Quote:
Results suggest that there are no gender differences in perceived symptom severity and associated degree of concern for 5-year-old boys and girls but that there is a gender difference in perceived future atypicality at 15 years old, with boys being rated as more likely to be perceived as atypical by their peers at that age than girls.


https://molecularautism.biomedcentral.c ... 019-0266-4


I'm not sure whether this also applies to adults. Looking at Aspie tests RAADS-R : Those with ASD males average 146 females average 160