Does this forum help or hurt?

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What I find odd is how members rarely talk about their underlying condition.

An autism diagnosis is based on behavior.

However, there's an underlying condition causing this behavior.

For me, it's brain functioning problems (brain damage).

Just as the rich get richer, there is a division in the absorption of help. One old proverb concerns a conversation between a wise man and a fool. You might expect the fool to gain more information from the exchange, but the reason he is a fool is because he has not been absorbing information all his life, while the wise one is always noticing new details.

For me personally, this forum does both. There was a point when WP was a very hostile enviroment so I left for a while (well, I also left to save time, but without the hostility I would've found myself some other way to save time), but since it did some good too I came back about half a year later to see if things had gotten better. The site is still rather poisonous on some parts, but has gotten less hostile... or maybe I'm just ignoring the right posts and people.

As for the advice, well, if you ask for advice or tell about your life in general on a forum like this, it's very likely that someone will comment on it. This is a forum after all. If you want professional advice, ask it from a professional. If you just want to rant, get a diary or write a post about it, but don't read the comments.

It has been an incredible help to me. One of the biggest helps I have had for a long time.

^^ 2 People are notoriously bad at distinguishing luck from skill or self-importance. Good point on the proliferation of bad advice, now that there are no publishers to filter out the dross. I see a huge number of instructional videos showing someone's first success, and almost none by those with years of experience. There are also professional instructions that assume mastery of the craft, and focus on how to achieve huge volumes.

When I first started reading threads here I was confused by the communication style. Also that new members spoke as freely as long term members, people spoke directly and no one got preferential treatment, there weren't any paid professionals to give free advice.
I held off on posting as I was having a lot of difficulty communicating at that point.

When I did ask for advice I found that although I got signposts from replies, I did not usually get the answers I was hoping to and realised what I needed at that time would only come from a paid professional. I wasnt in a position to afford this.

So I read old threads and found WP to be an encyclopedia of lived autistic experiences. At this time I learned more from searching old threads than I did from active threads, as each persons autism is unique to them and the likelihood of connecting on multiple levels with current posters was and still is slim.
If you've met one autistic person, that's exactly and all that has happened... you've met one autistic person.

This realisation means that instead of internalising the ignorance about autism that perseveres in general society, I aim to tolerate as a minimum standard, if not accept the spectrum of presentations and experiences of people with autistic spectrum conditions.

The key to effective participation on this site became clear to me shortly after I first joined, we are peers, we remain equals or the whole thing erodes.

My space to participate in this community, as I am, is just as valid as anyone elses... with any community to remain viable there must be balance regarding give and take.

The Forum helps me.

The conflict is hard, but is interesting to me to "practice" (from afar).

I find far more good apples than bad apples here and of course I think of the bad apples as good apples with sometimes hurtful viewpoints. It's hard to see a very vulnerable person being accosted with hurtful viewpoints, but I can lend my voice also and hope that vulnerable person knows enough to take what they need and leave the rest. If I felt the hurtful outweighed the helpful, I would leave, b/c I do not have time or energy for that. I need my spoons.

(And there's the Haven for the very vulnerable, which I've seen peers helping to keep safe.)

This forum has proven helpful. Putting difficult to express concepts to written words is important e.g., the lessons of those awesome creative-writing instructors (some of us experienced) love their students to learn, and retain over a lifetime.

I've found it extra helpful to learn of those rare like-minded WP members who are receptive to grappling with those difficult issues in new and refreshing ways e.g., issues on developing and maintaining friendships.