When did you start rocking / other stims?

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Personally, I believe that I was about ten years old when I started rocking back and forth as a way to calm down. I have a memory of being overwhelmed back then and rocking in a toilet stall.

However, I do remember getting overwhelmed before then. I have memories of being seven, covering my ears in the classroom, and talking to myself/singing/humming to block out things.

As for the hand flapping, that started later on, during my teenage years. I remember being either 13 or 14 and hand flapping.

However, for a while I was under the impression that I didn't usually hand flap in public. Until someone mentioned that they could always tell whenever I was stressed because of my tendency to hand flap. So maybe I'm not the most accurate of sources when it comes to reporting on my own body language.

I have rocked and swayed in public during times of stress or discomfort before. Usually I try to avoid doing this, but sometimes I don't even fully realise or I just give in to the urge to do so.

Mom says that I would twirl my hair around my fingers incessantly when I was 2-3.

I think my mom got me to stop doing that because she found it annoying, but I eventually just switched to other stims.

Truthfully, many little girls do that.

Yeah, but not to the extent that I did it.

It is a common stimming behavior in girls with long hair who are on the Spectrum.

6-7yrs listen to same piece of music (song) over and over for Approx3 HRS at a time. Still do but
Much more like months to years now. Even now. Mostly driving.
Mom cut my hair short do would not twerl it. When young .

I started clicking my joints including my back and neck at about 9. Thinking about it now, that's pretty odd.

I was a blatantly autistic young child.

Oddly, I don’t remember stimming. I was more the shut-in, destructive, screaming type.

From the get go.

^^ Seconded. My mother instinctively knew how to keep me happy ...

Earlier this year I would say I don't rock. A support group member was rocking and I thought to myself: "I don't do that." Except now I see that I do. In my 20s, I rocked bigtime (and hummed) on a very stressful road trip. I remember in childhood rotating my hips in bed... interestingly my AS-like daughter started doing this (age . This summer I "caught" myself rocking at an amusement park (I was sitting away from everyone). Last week I "caught" myself rocking while reading online. Other stims: In private, as I child I stuffed fuzz up my noise and to this day I smell my hair constantly. I bit(e) my nails. In public I twirl my hair and rub my earlobes and ears. My favorite one: STIM DANCE. I have tightly controlled myself for many decades and my friends and family would say I have no stims.

I would do this as a little one, but I would also put my hair in my mouth and chew on it. In kindergarten mom gave me an ultimatum: either stop the hair chewing or I get a haircut. Well, I couldn't stop, so for most of my childhood I had hair not long enough to reach my mouth. Much later I grew it out, but by then all of my friends knew how to braid and style their hair themselves without their parents' help. All I knew how to do was brush it and do a loose ponytail (my hair is pin straight so stuff slides out easily). I was too embarrassed to ask for help. I was also worried they'd cut it again if I was honest about my inability to care for it.

I'm in my 30s now, and I still don't have these long-hair styling skills. I usually just keep it short, because this is what is familiar for me, even if it was originally a punishment.

I've stimmed consistently from the time I was an infant, sometimes in the classic ways, but they've always changed, and at some points, it's hard to tell the difference between OCD compulsions and stims. My most aggressive stims/compulsions began when I was eight or nine. From that time, one of my funnier (in retrospect) childhood memories is chewing/sucking on my clothes and simultaneously being terrified because adults had warned me that the fibers would collect in my gut and eventually kill me. Maybe stories like that are why I switched stims so often.

my first clear memory of it is age 4.

the only thing that made me conscious was at age 6 when my dad told me to do it in front of them is fine, but other people wouldnt understand and might treat me badly.

they had to repeat this once in a while to remind me.

then i started knowing how to wait to be alone, hide it, or find simpler ones, alternatives, etc.

it was all very natural, no harshness..
because my parents never said anything until the age that they realized i could get in trouble or bullied for it.

and they explained their reasoning in a simple clear way that a small child can understand. no trauma associated with it. i actually tried to teach one of the stims to my cousins, and explain to them how it helps you relax. then my mom walked in and was surprised to see all of us rocking on chairs.

I can't imagine it any other way.

I stopped being paranoid of being made fun of, or treated badly, or thought of badly..(which later comes out in people's behaviour)

My BetterHelp dot com therapist (Karlee is her name and she is the best person)-- said 'have you tried stimming?' when i told her oftentimes the techniques she taught (e.g 'square breathing', visualizing, etc) were unhelpful.


She said stimming without fear of what people think, if it's not harming or distracting them badly, obviously (courtesy), is important.

Now I stim like crazy all the time during the day and it mitigates my anxiety significantly. Being still and NOT stimming can increase the anxiety. Stimming is not to be ashamed of as long as you are courteous and respectful.
SHE said... it's an important tool that your brain gave you for a REASON.

I think it was necessary to write that (i might have done so before, cannot recollect everything I spew out).

Another person might have been made to feel bad about it, ashamed/fearful. A professional psychologist, even though she doesn't specialize in ASD, recommends it strongly.

Interesting. I'm so tightly controlled and so anxious as a result. If I start to let loose, I'm pretty sure my NT friends are going to think I'm making myself ASD. Of course if I am less anxious as a result that could "justify the means".