Board index › General Discussion › General Autism Discussion

Taking an online course to avoid social disappointment

Page 3 of 4 [ 62 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3, 4  Next

Previous topic | Next topic

Fireblossom
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 18 Jan 2017
Gender: Female
Posts: 3,567

16 Jan 2020, 11:59 am

^ You're otherwise right, but aspergers is not a mental disorder, it's neurological. Same with autism.



Borromeo
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 1 Jun 2019
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,440

16 Jan 2020, 12:19 pm

I see...physical. The brain.

Quite right, but the point stands. We have got different brains, but the only thing wrong with them is most of the ones on this website have been used for moping and moaning a bit much. It sounds like incel central round here sometimes.


_________________
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 134 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 72 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)


Sweetleaf
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Jan 2011
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 34,461
Location: Somewhere in Colorado

16 Jan 2020, 4:07 pm

Marknis wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
Marknis wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
Marknis wrote:
If the TMS treatment doesn’t help me get a girlfriend, I don’t want to live anymore. I feel like most here for some reason want me to live but they don’t want me to have a girlfriend at the same time. They think I need to suffer for the sake of others and be stepped on to actually contribute to humanity instead of rising up from being bullied.


The TMS isn't going to automatically get you a girlfriend, but it could very well help your depression which in turn could allow you to enjoy whatever activities/hobbies/interests you have and which could in turn make it more likely for you to find a girlfriend(though that alone shouldn't be the focus).

Thing is if your depression is gotten under control you may end up being less fixated on not having a girlfriend, so you'll feel better which will make you healthier and in a better position to meet people. It would be a good way to rise up as you say...I've risen past some of the bullying I've experienced by getting help with my mental issues.


I just hope rising up will include finally having a girlfriend. I don’t want the bullies who said I never could have one to celebrate anymore nor do I want the people here who’ve told me to give up to smirk at me.


It very well could, but you have to let go of some of that...seems you can't do it on your own, so maybe the TMS could help.


Let go of what?


The past bullying experiences...its still taking up a lot of your head-space, and it would help if it wasn't. Those bullies don't deserve any more of your time.


_________________
We won't go back.


Marknis
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 24 Jan 2016
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,960
Location: The Vile Belt

16 Jan 2020, 5:44 pm

Sweetleaf wrote:
Marknis wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
Marknis wrote:
Sweetleaf wrote:
Marknis wrote:
If the TMS treatment doesn’t help me get a girlfriend, I don’t want to live anymore. I feel like most here for some reason want me to live but they don’t want me to have a girlfriend at the same time. They think I need to suffer for the sake of others and be stepped on to actually contribute to humanity instead of rising up from being bullied.


The TMS isn't going to automatically get you a girlfriend, but it could very well help your depression which in turn could allow you to enjoy whatever activities/hobbies/interests you have and which could in turn make it more likely for you to find a girlfriend(though that alone shouldn't be the focus).

Thing is if your depression is gotten under control you may end up being less fixated on not having a girlfriend, so you'll feel better which will make you healthier and in a better position to meet people. It would be a good way to rise up as you say...I've risen past some of the bullying I've experienced by getting help with my mental issues.


I just hope rising up will include finally having a girlfriend. I don’t want the bullies who said I never could have one to celebrate anymore nor do I want the people here who’ve told me to give up to smirk at me.


It very well could, but you have to let go of some of that...seems you can't do it on your own, so maybe the TMS could help.


Let go of what?


The past bullying experiences...its still taking up a lot of your head-space, and it would help if it wasn't. Those bullies don't deserve any more of your time.


I just really wish I could post about finally getting a girlfriend after all these years of suffering. Alliekit was going to help me celebrate by making a thread for me if it ever happened but she’s been gone since 2017 besides a single post in 2018 before disappearing again.



Borromeo
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 1 Jun 2019
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,440

16 Jan 2020, 6:34 pm

Dude, I'm pretty sure that if you can get you a girlfriend this entire forum is going to help you celebrate.

Now--it's a pleasant Thursday night. You're on the Austin, Texas time zone. Not to mention you're a cool dude who knows his music, his anime, and his own personal tastes. The rest is up to you.

If I've got a girlfriend as an undersized celibate who looks like a concentration camp escapee, drives a terrible car, obsesses over Aristotle and Catholic theology, then you have nothing to worry about. It's about your attitude. Maturity in a young man makes women want to hang out and chat. The friend zone is the right sort of landing zone: if she's in it for the long haul she will want to select from among her best most reliable friends! Go get 'em, Marknis!


_________________
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 134 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 72 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)


Dog1
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 18 Apr 2019
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 137

18 Jan 2020, 3:29 am

Borromeo wrote:
Dude, I'm pretty sure that if you can get you a girlfriend this entire forum is going to help you celebrate.

Now--it's a pleasant Thursday night. You're on the Austin, Texas time zone. Not to mention you're a cool dude who knows his music, his anime, and his own personal tastes. The rest is up to you.

If I've got a girlfriend as an undersized celibate who looks like a concentration camp escapee, drives a terrible car, obsesses over Aristotle and Catholic theology, then you have nothing to worry about. It's about your attitude. Maturity in a young man makes women want to hang out and chat. The friend zone is the right sort of landing zone: if she's in it for the long haul she will want to select from among her best most reliable friends! Go get 'em, Marknis!


The ball is in Marknis's court, now. :D



Borromeo
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 1 Jun 2019
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,440

18 Jan 2020, 3:22 pm

As it is for each one of us.

Have we got the balls to deal with it? Depends on us. It's free will in action and a lot of Aspies like sitting round talking about how tough it is when things don't go their way, but they're plumb terrified of making a decision. Been there, done that, it sucked.


_________________
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 134 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 72 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)


Beluga
Emu Egg
Emu Egg

Joined: 18 Jan 2020
Gender: Male
Posts: 2

18 Jan 2020, 3:37 pm

I prefer to learn by myself, it is more efficient as far as i'm concerned.
But i take group courses so i can meet other people and socialize.



Marknis
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 24 Jan 2016
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,960
Location: The Vile Belt

24 Jan 2020, 1:59 am

Right now I am struggling to even read the three chapters in my text book for the first quiz. The text book is also bringing up learned helplessness which is something others claim I have bought into.



Mona Pereth
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 11 Sep 2018
Gender: Female
Posts: 7,811
Location: New York City (Queens)

24 Jan 2020, 2:44 am

Marknis wrote:
If the TMS treatment doesn’t help me get a girlfriend, I don’t want to live anymore. I feel like most here for some reason want me to live but they don’t want me to have a girlfriend at the same time. They think I need to suffer for the sake of others and be stepped on to actually contribute to humanity instead of rising up from being bullied.

I doubt that anyone here specifically wants you to NOT have a girlfriend. Various people, including myself, have warned you that being too intent on finding a girlfriend can be counterproductive. But I think we'll all be happy for you if/when you do find a girlfriend.

Anyhow, it seems to me that the kind of woman you are seeking (the nerdy type) would likely prefer a college-educated man (and NOT just for his earnings potential), so that's ONE good reason to continue with college. BUT it's important to have a career goal in mind too, and to choose most of your courses with that career goal in mind. Otherwise you will have sunk a lot of money into very little accomplishment.


_________________
- Autistic in NYC - Resources and new ideas for the autistic adult community in the New York City metro area.
- Autistic peer-led groups (via text-based chat, currently) led or facilitated by members of the Autistic Peer Leadership Group.
- My Twitter / "X" (new as of 2021)


Last edited by Mona Pereth on 24 Jan 2020, 3:21 am, edited 1 time in total.

Mona Pereth
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 11 Sep 2018
Gender: Female
Posts: 7,811
Location: New York City (Queens)

24 Jan 2020, 3:00 am

Rainbow_Belle wrote:
Life never gets any easier when you have Aspergers. Learning social skills are waste of time when people are still going to reject you, bully you and ignore you. There is no therapy or cure Aspergers. Aspergers is strongly linked to chronic loneliness and not being accepted by people. I doubt people have Aspergers, when they claim how easy they find it to make friends and fit into social situations. There are no benefits to having Aspergers. You can be intelligent and achieve high marks in STEM and you will still not be socially accepted because of your Aspergers.

One can look for social situations in which one is more likely to be accepted. Such situations may include:

1) An adult autism support group.
2) Various oddball subcultures. (Easier to find in large cosmopolitan cities than elsewhere.)
3) Highly multi-cultural neighborhoods with people from all over the world and no one dominant ethnic group.
4) Situations where one's particular expertise is needed and appreciated.


_________________
- Autistic in NYC - Resources and new ideas for the autistic adult community in the New York City metro area.
- Autistic peer-led groups (via text-based chat, currently) led or facilitated by members of the Autistic Peer Leadership Group.
- My Twitter / "X" (new as of 2021)


Mona Pereth
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 11 Sep 2018
Gender: Female
Posts: 7,811
Location: New York City (Queens)

24 Jan 2020, 3:24 am

Rainbow_Belle wrote:
You will face even more disappointment when the majority of recruiters and employers do not recognise your online course.

Depends on the school offering the online course. Just make sure it's offered by an accredited school with a good reputation.


_________________
- Autistic in NYC - Resources and new ideas for the autistic adult community in the New York City metro area.
- Autistic peer-led groups (via text-based chat, currently) led or facilitated by members of the Autistic Peer Leadership Group.
- My Twitter / "X" (new as of 2021)


Marknis
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 24 Jan 2016
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,960
Location: The Vile Belt

24 Jan 2020, 12:51 pm

Mona Pereth wrote:
Marknis wrote:
If the TMS treatment doesn’t help me get a girlfriend, I don’t want to live anymore. I feel like most here for some reason want me to live but they don’t want me to have a girlfriend at the same time. They think I need to suffer for the sake of others and be stepped on to actually contribute to humanity instead of rising up from being bullied.

I doubt that anyone here specifically wants you to NOT have a girlfriend. Various people, including myself, have warned you that being too intent on finding a girlfriend can be counterproductive. But I think we'll all be happy for you if/when you do find a girlfriend.

Anyhow, it seems to me that the kind of woman you are seeking (the nerdy type) would likely prefer a college-educated man (and NOT just for his earnings potential), so that's ONE good reason to continue with college. BUT it's important to have a career goal in mind too, and to choose most of your courses with that career goal in mind. Otherwise you will have sunk a lot of money into very little accomplishment.


I actually have had others tell me to give up and quite a number of people have made it clear they dislike me so even if I did get a girlfriend, they wouldn’t be happy for me.



Dog1
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 18 Apr 2019
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 137

25 Jan 2020, 3:45 am

Marknis wrote:
Mona Pereth wrote:
Marknis wrote:
If the TMS treatment doesn’t help me get a girlfriend, I don’t want to live anymore. I feel like most here for some reason want me to live but they don’t want me to have a girlfriend at the same time. They think I need to suffer for the sake of others and be stepped on to actually contribute to humanity instead of rising up from being bullied.

I doubt that anyone here specifically wants you to NOT have a girlfriend. Various people, including myself, have warned you that being too intent on finding a girlfriend can be counterproductive. But I think we'll all be happy for you if/when you do find a girlfriend.

Anyhow, it seems to me that the kind of woman you are seeking (the nerdy type) would likely prefer a college-educated man (and NOT just for his earnings potential), so that's ONE good reason to continue with college. BUT it's important to have a career goal in mind too, and to choose most of your courses with that career goal in mind. Otherwise you will have sunk a lot of money into very little accomplishment.


I actually have had others tell me to give up and quite a number of people have made it clear they dislike me so even if I did get a girlfriend, they wouldn’t be happy for me.


Why do you focus on that so much?



Marknis
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 24 Jan 2016
Gender: Male
Posts: 5,960
Location: The Vile Belt

06 Mar 2020, 5:40 pm

This course isn’t helping me at all.



chemicalsandotherpeopleswords
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

Joined: 7 Dec 2019
Gender: Male
Posts: 169

07 Mar 2020, 3:25 am

Good luck!


_________________
"The inherent worth and dignity of every human person"

"I'm not good, I'm not nice, I'm just right!"

"Congratulations to the dry eyes, and consolations to the nice guys"