MUST you do these things and why do it at that age ?

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I seem to have this idealistic perception that someone in their 20s MUST be at the height of a career in their mid twenties, have lots of money and a house and have it all sorted by 30 and that people do things at certain age as though it is what you MUST do, like at 16 and 17, you MUST leave school (I left at 18 and started driving at 28 and MUST drive a car, and you MUST leave Uni at 22 or 23 (I left and never graduated and was out of work until 26).

You already have a thread asking basically the same question.

The answer is no.

All you mention in your post does not reflect reality - all you need to do is look around you. Do you have any idea where this perceptions are coming from and why is it so difficult for you to let go of them?

Yeah maybe at the time the boomers grew up that was true...

Lol us millennials won't even get retirement when we reach old age, the way things are going.

It wasn't really the case for that many people back then either (were your parents that way?), although the pressure to make it look that way was stronger. For many, probably most people, life is messy.

I'm a boomer, and I didn't even begin my current career until I finished the degree that led to it at age 25.

Also, if you do any research, you'll find out that a shockingly high per cent of boomers are financially unprepared for retirement and are or will soon be in a desperate situation once they become to old or infirm to earn a living. In fact, I would say the generation least likely to have a problem financing their retirement is Generation X. If you want to envy another generation, envy them.

I'm a Gen X. I finished my degrees, bought my first house at age 23, had a career and all those wonderful things in my 20's. I have a pension and everything should be great. Even for people of my generation, I was moving a little faster than the norm.

The walls came tumbling down in my 30s because I was undiagnosed autistic and I had a breakdown which nearly killed me.

In my 40s I had a stroke from all the stress.

I wish I took things more slowly in my 20s and realised what my limitations truly were.

@Isabella very sorry if my post made you feel bad.

As I see it, Gen Xers have an advantage over boomers for a couple of reasons which you should feel free to dispute:

1.) At least in the US, they were born too late to be influenced by the anti-materialistic bullcrap being popularized when boomers were young, so to a much greater extent they began life with the desire to accumulate material wealth and to act on that, without any of the guilt felt by many boomers at being materialistic or greedy.
2.) There are far fewer of them. When they enter retirement, the trust funds on which government old age benefits are drawn will be under less financial pressure than now as the more numerous boomers are retiring.
3.) When they were entering the workforce i.e. beginning early/mid 1980s they faced quite a long period of economic expansion, at least in the US, so were probably better able to establish themselves financially at a young age than either boomers or millennials. Also (again US example) tuition for post-secondary education was probably much more affordable when they were students and their silent-generation parents were probably better able to pay for it than millennials' parents (who are mostly boomers) so they are less likely to have a big tuition debt load than millennials.

Of course individuals' situations can be quite different. My brother-in-law is Gen X, he was living high on the hog until the Recession and has struggled since to recover, but he has his own personal situation to consider.

Your post didn't upset me in the least, MaxE! I thought you made a good point about Gen X, so I just wanted to reassure Chris all that glitters isn't gold.

I don't know very much about socioeconomics so I can't really add much to your three points, but I'll try.

1) I was a teenager in the 80s. I'm the John Hughes generation (Breakfast Club, Ferris Bueller). I'm not American but I did move to California for my final two years of high school, in the mid 80s. It was the Valley Girl period of time, with Reagan as US president. I hated that lifestyle to say the least, but it was my culture until I moved back home for Uni and escaped. Yes looking back it was a very consumer-centric period of time. I know nothing about economics but I assume it was a time of affluence and commercialism.

2) Yes. I think you're right. I have a healthy long-term disability package as well as a pension from my career, and I will get government pension money as well. I can retire in the next couple of years if I switch from Disability to Pension, but my income will go down a little being retired instead of LTD. At least I don't have to worry that the well will run dry on my pension.

3) My tuition was much, much more affordable than what kids pay today. I never had any student debt despite living away at a prestigious Uni for my degrees. I'll admit and be forever grateful that my grandmother helped with tuition fees. Regardless, the cost of one year of school has risen about 1000% where I attended.

My nephew and his friends are in their 20s now as Millennials and I acknowledge that there's no way they could accomplish what I did, at their age.

The only thing I see having improved for this generation is the interest rate. The interest on my first mortgage in the early 1990s was about 4x higher than interest interest rates today. Of course minimum wage is higher now too, but all things considered the cost of living is disproportionately higher now than it was for my generation.

Last edited by IsabellaLinton on 16 Feb 2020, 1:28 pm, edited 1 time in total.

At this point, I think that the only adequate response is that which King Arthur delivered to the Black Knight in Monty Python's Holy Grail quest. It was still not convincing, but Arthur and Patsy got to continue on with their lives.

While it may appear that way, it is not reality. Many people struggle in their 20s just trying to figure out with what to do with their lives. I see it everyday in the classes that I teach at a university. They are just beginning on the road through life’s journey.

According to your perception, I have failed at life. I did not finish my doctorate degree until I was in my mid 30s. I still do not own a home even though I am well into my 40s. I will be paying back my student loans until I die, so I am not rich. Many of my former students make more money than I do.

Yet, I have not failed at life because of what I do. I enjoy teaching others and seeing their progress towards what they want to do in life. Not every success in life can be tied to a dollar sign.

Re: MUST you do these things and why do it at that age ? 'NO'

Where all brain washed at an early age to be a slave to this corrupt capitalist system.

Hence,we become programmed into a sheep like mentality and follow as everyone else is doing and think this is the right way.

Right planet,wrong society,don't conform to lies and the illusion.

When you start thinking you must be living by someone elses ideology,this in turn leads to internal misery and feeling torn.

Be the master of your own destiny,live it,without comparing apples.

This.

There are people who do very well in their 20s—but burn out or screw up. I’ve met some of these people. And one doesn’t have to be autistic.

That describes me exactly. I burned out, because I screwed up by doing too much too quickly. I had no friends so there was no one to model after, and I assumed that when school ended it was time to leave my parents, work 24/7, own a house, and fall in love with a series of "Mr Wrong".

I wish I had someone to guide me through those years. I'm still recuperating from the burnout and my breakdown.

These days people have reasonably good health in their 70s and beyond, so why the rush?

Indeed. The course of Life is a marathon, not a sprint.