Can you tell someone else is also on the spectrum?

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Brainiac42
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17 Jun 2021, 3:35 pm

Fnord wrote:
So, at best, anyone with "aspiedar" can only perceive traits that may be caused by autism (among other things), and that autism may only be suspected until confirmed by the person or a close relative.

THAT makes sense.


I’m sorry, I thought that was obvious as there’s no way to know if you’re right with no confirmation, so the question therefore cannot accurately be answered without it.



Fnord
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17 Jun 2021, 4:21 pm

Brainiac42 wrote:
Fnord wrote:
So, at best, anyone with "aspiedar" can only perceive traits that may be caused by autism (among other things), and that autism may only be suspected until confirmed by the person or a close relative.  THAT makes sense.
I’m sorry, I thought that was obvious as there’s no way to know if you’re right with no confirmation, so the question therefore cannot accurately be answered without it.
Ahh ... nice to know.  I rarely assume parameters beyond the literal interpretation of a question as it is stated.


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Brainiac42
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17 Jun 2021, 4:32 pm

Fnord wrote:
Brainiac42 wrote:
Fnord wrote:
So, at best, anyone with "aspiedar" can only perceive traits that may be caused by autism (among other things), and that autism may only be suspected until confirmed by the person or a close relative.  THAT makes sense.
I’m sorry, I thought that was obvious as there’s no way to know if you’re right with no confirmation, so the question therefore cannot accurately be answered without it.
Ahh ... nice to know.  I rarely assume parameters beyond the literal interpretation of a question as it is stated.


I understand. It was an interesting discussion.



kraftiekortie
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17 Jun 2021, 4:38 pm

I can certainly tell when someone has "classic" autism. I was good friends with the sister of a person with "classic" autism when I was growing up.

And I had some of the symptoms as a young toddler/preschooler, too.

It's harder to distinguish one with Asperger's from one who is just "quirky."



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17 Jun 2021, 5:21 pm

Yes I can tell, but my reaction to that can be on the opposite sides of, khem, spectrum....

Sometimes I am drawn to those people because of similar topics to talk about, similar view on life, we are just on the same wavelength somehow. It feels easy to be together.

And other times they irritate me as if I was an NT - they stand too close, they follow me around when I give cues that I want to be alone, they stare in my eyes and dont notice when I am not listening, meanwhile I notice disregard for other people, for example when they park in the middle of two last parking spaces, or dont move out of the way when someone wants to pass. In these cases I feel ashamed and responsible for all the trouble caused.

Weird huh. Considering that I myself have more social than sensory problems.



Brainiac42
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17 Jun 2021, 5:24 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
I can certainly tell when someone has "classic" autism. I was good friends with the sister of a person with "classic" autism when I was growing up.

And I had some of the symptoms as a young toddler/preschooler, too.

It's harder to distinguish one with Asperger's from one who is just "quirky."


I am unsure myself if I have Aspergers. I am undiagnosed but I have special interests that are all consuming, and are all I want to talk about in discussions. I also feel different from other people, don’t understand social cues and I am bad at talking about feelings/emotions. I also stim in private or secretly. I often just come across as socially awkward/quirky to others though, I think anyway.



kraftiekortie
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17 Jun 2021, 5:31 pm

I believe there's actually a vague line between someone who is "quirky" and someone with Aspergian-like traits.

I certainly wouldn't be able to tell whether or not you have Asperger's based upon just casually meeting you. I'd have to get to know you over time. And certainly not online!

What sort of difficulties do you experience as a result of your "quirkiness"?



Brainiac42
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17 Jun 2021, 5:52 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
I believe there's actually a vague line between someone who is "quirky" and someone with Aspergian-like traits.

I certainly wouldn't be able to tell whether or not you have Asperger's based upon just casually meeting you. I'd have to get to know you over time. And certainly not online!

What sort of difficulties do you experience as a result of your "quirkiness"?


Just difficulty maintaining conversations, eye contact.. mainly social issues. I also have sensory issues with smells, textures, and sometimes noise. I tend to hear everyone in a room instead of 1 person and it makes it hard to communicate.

I also have OCD traits which causes a lot of anxiety and can go hand in hand from my research with autistic traits. It’s hard to say really.


I see where you’re coming from about the fine line between quirky and HFA.



kraftiekortie
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17 Jun 2021, 6:36 pm

If you're in the US, and you want a diagnosis, it's possible to get a free diagnosis if you participate in a research study pertaining to autism. Otherwise, it tends to be very costly.

Do you feel an autism diagnosis would provide some sort of "closure," in a sense-----make sense of why you experience things the way you experience things?

If an entity is still using the ICD-10, it's possible to get an Asperger's diagnosis.



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18 Jun 2021, 4:09 am

I have had some suspicions (I don't like this word but cannot think of a better one) about boys I knew when young confirmed by later diagnosis.

I wondered about the behaviour of some girls about 25 years ago but the reading I did then convinced me I was wrong. I have since become aware that autism can present very differently in girls and I regret not being able to help them due to the incorrect/incomplete information I had at the time.

My diagnosis came after a long time friend with whom I played online games most days took to calling me 'Sheldon'. A few other online friends made similar subtle indications but I didn't work those out until after I was diagnosed. After a few years of this and some reading about how autism presents in women I sought a diagnosis for myself.



kraftiekortie
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18 Jun 2021, 6:41 am

In women, autism often presents like male autism — but sometimes there is a “female presentation,” owing to social conditioning.

The 4 to 1 male to female ratio for autism is bogus in my opinion. Women are certainly under-diagnosed.



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18 Jun 2021, 7:08 am

Brainiac42 wrote:
Fnord wrote:
Again, how did you confirm your suspicions?


In my case, I was told. In two cases by the parent. In the other by the person themselves.

** Their answers were not suspicions, but formal, proven, diagnoses. **

You can dive deep into anything if you want to. You could say the psychiatrist was just giving an educated guess, so even they don’t know for sure.. making me possibly less accurate. You could create a formula removing accuracy percentages depending on the psychiatrists years in the field. Maybe the parents were lying, you could dive deep into their backgrounds.. if they’d cheated on their spouse their probability of lying is higher, therefore remove accuracy percentages.

But it isn’t that deep. I do see where you’re coming from though.


Well said.



SandWitch
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18 Jun 2021, 3:48 pm

Yes, because I usually strongly dislike them. Lmao...

But seriously, no.. I cannot..



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19 Jun 2021, 12:45 am

I can tell when some other people are on. The most remarkable one was a guy I only knew from a BBS and a bit of private email. He had a successful business and a family, but when I suggested he also had AS, he had an Aha! moment just like mine, understanding his struggles.